


In the Arms of Another

by dragonndoggod



Series: In the Arms of Another [3]
Category: Sex Pistols | Love Pistols
Genre: Anal Sex, Betrayal, Cheating, F/M, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Oral Sex, Shirou gets tired of waiting, Uncertainty, Waiting on the sidelines, a chance of happiness, opportunity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-12
Updated: 2011-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-13 01:49:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 51,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7957678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonndoggod/pseuds/dragonndoggod
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on chapter 28, where Shirou is out with Norio and Teruhiko and says “Should I be satisfied with just the chance to be by his side?” What if that’s all he has?  And someone has taken notice after almost five years of being by Yonekuni’s side, wanting to get closer to him.  Will Shirou be lured away for a chance of happiness?  Or will he be content of just staying by Yonekuni’s side? And what if Yonekuni realizes it too late?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

‘There were times,’ Shirou thought to himself as he sighed and drowned down what was left in his glass before setting the champagne flute down to gaze about the party that was in full swing ‘that he could just disappear.’ He should be there celebrating with the one he loved and he wanted nothing more than to approach Yonekuni, hand him the present he held and be pulled close. He thought that hopefully they would be closer but as he continued to scan the party, his eyes landing on the one of his thoughts. The one who was leaning in and talking to one of the many girls who were invited to the party. Shifting in his spot, he felt the gaze of Norio and Kunimasa and if Teruhiko was there, he would most likely feel the weight of the bear’s gaze as well.

The gift in his hand becoming heavy for every minute he carried it, setting the bag on the table before abandoning his spot, grabbing another flute of champagne and headed to the small terrace that let lead out to the yard. The sound of the party dimming down the more he moved further away. Leaning against a pillar off to the side, clenching his eyes tightly shut, he bit his lip to stop all sounds that wanted to escape. He couldn’t show how much the sight had hurt him, he had to be happy with what he was given. Even if it wasn’t what he wanted, he shouldn’t be greedy.

The creek of the door jerked him from his thoughts, quickly and he hoped fully, removing all the pain in his expression. He didn’t want to share with the world of being rejected. At least, not right now. But after the creek of the door, silence as a familiar blond haired male walked away from the party. Feeling his heart jump before falling in disappointment. It wasn’t Yonekuni. Yonekuni wouldn’t chase him out here, no matter how much he hoped for it.

A heavy sigh, pushing away from his pillar and went to see what was wrong.

“Hidekuni-kun?”

Laying his hand on the younger male’s shoulder, seeing the blond lift his head and give him a weak smile. ”You’re out here to drink away your sorrows as well?” He could only look down, ashamed to be found out so easily. ”Don’t feel bad, I’m here for the same reason.” He followed the cat towards a bench, taking a seat next to him before patting his leg.

“It’s a little sad. I should be happy that he’s allowing me to be by his side-” He could only bite off his words, a hand on his back in an awkward attempt to comfort him. Turning his head, glad that it was dark enough to hide the tears that started to slip down his cheeks. He couldn’t say it, couldn’t say anything without breaking down. It wasn’t what he wanted.

“It’ll be okay, you’ll see.” The comforting words, he could hear the pain in them as the younger blond stared straight ahead all the while rubbing his shoulders. It was easy to see that Hidekuni was hurt seeing Norio with Kunimasa, that he wasn’t picked. He tried to chuckle when the blond’s hand slipped from his shoulders to his sides, tried to lighten the mood as the younger comforted him.

Resisting the urge to lay his head on Hidekuni’s shoulder as the comforting hand rubbed circles on his back, slipping away and down as blue eyes scanned the area before them before being turned to him. ”We’re just a pair, aren’t we? Can’t be with the ones we love, having to put on a brave front when talking to them.” The pain in the younger male’s voice hit him. Biting his lower lip, a sob hitching out as he quietly tried and failing to stop the tears from falling. The idea of being together with Yonekuni, dangling in front of him to lure him further. He didn’t see the widening of blue eyes as Hidekuni forced his head onto his shoulder while whispers in his ears

The party continued without them as they sought comfort with each other, never seeing the lone figure paused outside the door. The glaring look sent towards the two before spinning on his heel and returning back to the party.

Glancing at the one who sat next to him, Hidekuni couldn’t help the sad smile that crossed his face. Shirou was almost in the same boat as he and he remembered the pained look the male wore when Yonekuni walked into the party with another on his arm. It was easy to see the hurt that crossed his face and the trembling of his body. Though he was chilled, he didn’t want to move from his spot, content for now with the heat that seemed to roll off the heavyweight’s body. He never told anyone that he had planned on staying in Japan and hoped that he had a friend in the wolf.

After the holidays had ended and school picking back up, neither had time to think about each other’s situation. Exams had taken his mind off the pain he felt, Shirou didn’t have much time to figure out what was going on in Yonekuni’s mind. Content, as much as he could be, to study and pass. To graduate and get into a college that he had his eye on for some time. He had to admit that there were times he felt the hot gaze on his skin, as if the blond was undressing him with his eyes. He knew that wasn’t the case, no matter how much he wished it for. He knew he didn’t have it that bad, being welcome to join Yonekuni on outings that he would secretly refer to as dates. He did this to himself, pretending that they were a normal couple that weren’t all for touching.

There were times that he thought the blond was rubbing it in his face, he never thought Yonekuni could be so cruel. As if the blond was reverting to the way he used to be months and years before. It was only after their exams had finished, gearing up for graduation did Hidekuni show up once again. The familiar blond head peeked in, eyes glancing around the room before spotting the one he was searching for.

His eyes downcast, trying to focus and concentrate on the book opened before him, words just blurring as he read and reread the same lines. He didn’t see the figure approaching him until a shadow fell over him, blocking out the lights from above. A glance up, his eyes widening as he looked up into blue eyes, eyes that reminded him of the younger male’s older brother. Before he could say a word, his eyes took in the broad shoulders and the way the school uniform seemed to fit the younger male perfectly.

“Hidekuni-kun, wha-,” he shook his head, gesturing towards the clothes his friend wore. The jaguar must have known what he was trying to ask and grinned down at him.

“Well, I officially don’t start until the next term, but because of some upcoming projects my parents have here, it was decided that I should be enrolled here and just finish my schooling in japan.” The grin that the blond wore went from charming and friendly to series before the younger one grabbed an empty chair and pulled it to the desk that he was sitting at and took a seat. ”And since I’m here for the next couple of years, I’ve been wondering if you could tutor me in several subjects that I know I’ll need help in.”

Unable to hold back the shock he felt, he was surprised and didn’t see the glower from the doorway before the second blond approached. Eyes peering up at him through the male’s bangs, he smiled and thought about it. Licking his lower lip in nervousness, he dropped his gaze to his book as he thought before being startled by the slight touch of his hand. That grin again, looking up into pale eyes.

“So, would that be okay with you? I’m pretty well caught up and scored high on the entrance tests, but there are things that I know I’ll need help with.”

Waiting to hear any kind of responses from the applications and testing he did for the colleges he wanted to go to, he knew he had some free time. And maybe helping Hidekuni would help him get over not being with Yonekuni.

“I don’t think he’ll be doing anything of the sort to help you,” the deep drawl from behind them, startling Shirou and causing Hidekuni to from from his spot in the chair. They watched the heavyweight move from behind them to his seat before the nekomata dismissed his older brother, turning his attention back to the wolf before him.

“So, what do you say?” He didn’t wait for an answer and instead, he pulled out a pen and a piece of paper from his pocket, quickly writing down his cellphone number. Pushing the paper in Shirou’s direction, he waited and watched the canine take the paper in his hand. Hiding the pleasure he felt, a smile wanting to break through, he chanced a glance at his older brother. The frown that the older male wore, watching Yonekuni’s hands curl into fists on the desk. Interesting. Even after pushing away the male, the reptile was still possessive and jealous enough to not like the wolf to get numbers from other males.

“Please think about it, it would be a great help to me and you,” a smile at the startled look. “Who looks like you need a friend. Or a shoulder to cry on.” Pushing back the chair, he gave his brother a little smile. While he only wanted to be friends with Shirou, he couldn’t help but feel a twinge in his chest when his brother leaned in close to the heavyweight. Shaking away the feeling, he headed back into the hall and away with the plans of dropping in on Norio. Though he couldn’t be with the cat, he still wanted to remain friends with him.

Watching the door with narrowed eyes, making sure that it stayed closed and that his brother was no longer around to bother them, he turned his attention back to the wolf. The paper was still in Shirou’s hands, watching the male stare down at it.

“You’re not going to help him, are you?” He couldn’t help but ask. He didn’t like the look his younger brother gave Shirou, the touch to the wolf’s hand and the slight intimacy that seemed to grow between them. Feeling like an outsider, only being able to watch while Hidekuni talking to the male. He didn’t like it at all. Ignoring the odd look the male gave him, he dug deep into himself, looking for the words that he hoped would stop Shirou from wanting to help. But as he opened his mouth, the sound of paper being folded and shoved into a pocket, derailing his thoughts.

“Madarame,” he suppressed the shiver that Shirou’s voice created in him. ”I-I think I am going to help him.”

The soft confession startled him even more so that when he heard the nekomata’s words. The firm press of lips, watching them whiten from the pressure. The hint of teeth peeking out, as if the wolf was debating on biting his lower lip before changing his mind.

“W-what? Why?” The question was asked before he could stop himself, quietly damning himself for stuttering and blurting out a question like that. A heavy sigh, lips parting to speak.

“Madarame-, no, Yonekuni,” a deep breath at his name being spoken. How long had he been waiting to hear his name come from Shirou’s lips? ”I told you so long ago that I love you.” He tore his eyes away, checking to see if anyone was paying attention and when he found out that no one paid them any heed, he turned back to the wolf. Barely catching the hint of raw pain in eyes before such emotion was pushed away. ”And I always will. But since you seem to have more of an interest in girls and not me,” he barely caught the last words. He could see Shirou bite his bottom lip, could see him worry and hear the slight hitch in the wolf’s voice, the hidden pain as long fingers curled.

“I just want to help. He’s hurting as much as I am.” Shirou turned his attention away from him and he could only swallow hard. “So, you want to comfort him, do you?” Words slipped out, his voice harsh while his expression matched his tone. He didn’t like the feeling that was racing through him, the urge to push Shirou away and yet, pull him closer. Bring him into the circle of his arms. To show everyone, including his brother, that the wolf belonged to him and him only. Such emotions that he wasn’t used to, uncomfortable to the point that he pulled away. He didn’t look down at Shirou’s upturned face when he pushed back his chair and stood. Walking away from the broken hearted boy, he kept his back to Shirou, pausing at the door to look over his shoulder, seeing the male looking down at his desk with his eyes closed. A little shake of his head, he forced himself to move.

The slam of the door startled both him and those who stayed inside for lunch. Hands clenched under his desk while he forced himself not to cry. He was stronger than this, is stronger than to cry in the middle of the classroom. He faced more than that and gotten through the pain he felt, he had a chance to be with the one he loved. More than what others got. Forcing himself to smile when a concerned classmate asked if he was alright, waving off their concern with a false cheerfulness.

As class started once again, ignored as he used to be earlier in the year, he counted down the minutes. When the bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, he took his time putting his things away, not wanting to go home where he’d have to lay in a bed that Yonekuni had taken him so many times. To remember that he didn’t have much of a chance to be with the one he loved. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, pushing back his chair, he attempted to walk away fro the day and would have, if not for the tight grasp on his wrist stopping him. Fingernails digging painfully into his skin, ignoring the sting of pain.

Slitted blue eyes stared up at him, tugging and pulling him down, forcing him to stumble and land in the blond’s lap. A thrill of pleasure ran through him before he froze, back stiffening. He didn’t want to embarrass Yonekuni, didn’t want to cause the one he loved with rumors. A brief look around the room told them that they were alone, giving a sigh of relief when no one would watch or hear what they were doing and talking about. When he attempted to free himself from Yonekuni’s grasp, the hold on him became tighter. An arm around his back, pulling him closer and a nose against his cheek, breathing him in deeply.

“I know you’re hurt and I wish I knew how I felt,” words paused, hearing Yonekuni swallow hard before continuing. ”I want to give you reassurance. I want to wipe away the uncertainty that you feel. But right now, I can’t. I don’t know how or what I feel for you.” The nose against his cheek moved further, a lick at the lobe of his ear while warm breath brushed against his skin had him shuddering. Biting his lip to hold back the moan that wanted to rise in his throat before he pulled his body away, it wouldn’t do him any good if Yonekuni knew how turned on he was.

“All I can as is that you wait for me, please.” Words as he tried to move his lower body back, away so that the reptile wouldn’t feel what was happening to his body. Nodding his answer, mouth dry as his eyes fluttered close. The grasp on him dropped away from his wrist, giving him the room to pull away any time he wanted. He knew he should pull away, not get his hopes up as lips parted to nibble on the lobe of his ear. A painful nip by sharp teeth had him whimpering, pulling away. Eyes opening, the flushed look on Yonekuni’s cheeks had him jumping back and apologizing. Looking everywhere but directly into Yonekuni’s eyes, gaze sliding away and down, pausing at the noticeable bulge in the blond’s dark pants. He wanted nothing more than to spread Yonekuni’s long legs, nestle between them and unbutton the pants. Part the flaps and palm the hard flesh that lay hidden underneath the last layer of clothing.

He found himself moving, surprising both himself and Yonekuni. Legs parted on their own accord, dropping to his knees on the hard floor while his hands slid up and between. Nuzzling the prize that awaited him, his hands went to move, unbuttoning and lowering the zipper, relishing the groan that Yonekuni gave before the hand on his shoulder stopped him. Eyes flying open, he didn’t realize that he closed them, the expression that Yonekuni wore had him back peddling, looking away in shame. Here Yonekuni was, telling him to wait until he knew what his feelings were saying and he had to go and screw things up.

Facing heating up for many reasons, none of which he cared to explore, he made quick work redoing what he had undone. Apologizing profusely while keeping his eyes on the ground, waiting for the harsh words he knew Yonekuni would speak with. Berate him for being selfish, for ignoring what he had said earlier, but when none came, he chanced a look up. Expecting to see a furious expression, to see the disappointment that the blond normally would wear. But to his amazement, it was the opposite of what he thought. Flushed cheeks and blue eyes, slitted even more, glazed over. Hands clenched at Yonekuni’s sides, faint trembling had him scooting back a safe distance before he scrambled to his feet.

“I-I’m so sorry, Madarame.” He looked away in shame, never seeing the flinch from the use of the name. Any words that he wanted to say were stopped by the sound of the door rattling before being opened. The familiar head of the one girl that Yonekuni had flirted with at the Christmas party. The one that he had been spending time with, popped in and before he could say anything else, he squared his shoulders and gave the blond a nod while the girl rushed past him. Trying to ignore the look of triumph shot towards him and the apologetic look Yonekuni gave him before letting himself out of the classroom.

If he only looked back, he would have seen slight pleading in blue eyes, words that wouldn’t be spoken. A step away from the door, finding his knees trembling before stumbling and pressing his back against the cool wall beside the door. Closing his eyes, squeezing them tightly, forcing away the tears that were building up inside him. Pulling off his glasses, letting what tears he couldn’t push away, slip down his cheeks while pressing a hand against his chest. The familiar ache that he had known through out middle school and high school returned in full force. A piercing feeling, leaving him shuddering as he doubled over. He didn’t hear approaching footsteps that broke into a run at the sight of him, only looking up when he felt hands on his shoulders and the call of his name. Eyes blurry, making out the worried features of the younger, blond male.

“Hidekuni?” His voice low and hoarse, wincing at the tremor he heard.

The younger male didn’t say a word, barely glancing at the door before pulling the canine away from the wall and down the hall. Away from the one who seemed to cause all the problems for the wolf. He could easily smell his brother on his friend, just a hit but it was enough to tell him that the heavyweight had gotten his hopes up and had them crash around him. Reaching the stairs, the call of Shirou’s name, a smaller in stature male approached. The murmured words of the boy’s name, a friend of Shirou’s. He couldn’t help the urge to protect his friend, but when he saw the worry and pain plainly on the male’s face, he relented.

“Take him home, please.” Though he made the request, his voice held authority. Seeing the dark haired male nod before determination fixed on the man’s face. Another nod before the husky voice and an arm wrapped around Shirou’s shoulder, guiding the wolf away. Standing in his spot, watching both dark haired males walk away until he lost track of them, turning on his heels and returning to where he found Shirou. Pausing, facing the door before quietly opening it just enough to peek inside. The noise that he made went unheard by the two occupants, distracted as they were.

His eyes fell away from the scene before quietly closing the door. No wonder Shirou was upset, on the verge of panic. To see the one he wanted with another, even when he carried the reptile’s scent on him. Pushing himself away, he hurried up to catch up to the two. Taking the stairs two at a time, bursting through the heavy double doors of the school before he caught up to the two as they reached the school gates. Grinning to himself, inwardly at the look of irritation on Shirou’s friend’s face. The male didn’t appreciate him being with Shirou, more competition for the wolf’s attention and affections.

Giving Shirou the support that he needed, introducing himself to Shirou’s friend, who responded back with his name. The walk to the train station for the three, save for the mutterings that Oushou made under his breath. Laying his hand on Shirou’s shoulder, feeling the canine flinch and the deep breath that he made, waiting for the wolf to pull himself together, it was the response that took his breath away. The watery smile that the male gave them both, one flushing while Hidekuni couldn’t help the slight feeling in his chest, close to his chest. A feeling that he hadn’t had a chance to feel since summer. Not since he experienced his first rejection. Finding his hand moving on its own, brushing away a stray tear that made its way down the pale cheek.

Unaware of the scene he was created, he gave the wolf his reassurances while nodding over Shirou’s head. The wait for the train, amongst the other students heading home, was short and with the train being crowded, the three stood together. Cramped and hot, the nekomata couldn’t help but be distracted by the pheromones that the wolf was giving off. A curious look around, those who were of madararui blood seemed to be entranced by the scent, wondering and curious. Inching closer, crowding around them to get a better whiff and view while the one they were interested in seemed obvious to their attempts and their attention.

A sigh of relief when their stop came, following Oushou and Shirou out and away from the station, not knowing the way. A little uncomfortable with following instead of leading, he trailed a few steps behind, over hearing the pep talk that Oushou was giving Shirou. Telling him to chin up, that he should have more pride in what he was, that he shouldn’t mope and didn’t want to see him from. Only wanted to see him smile. He picked up on the barely there tremor in the male’s voice, the nervousness that the male must have been feeling. Unable to hear what was being spoken, he heard the light chuckle coming from Shirou, it must have been good. It felt nice hearing the canine laugh, even if it was only a small one. Sadness didn’t suit Shirou at all, not when his lips could be smiling at him.

Laughing, parted and moist from a rather quick lick to them. Licking away various things that drip down onto them, pale fluid that was almost clear enough. Covered in his scent.

They didn’t see him stiffen at the thought, the wave of heat that ran though him at the thought of lips parting. A pink tongue peeking out, licking at the finger that rubbed against lips. It was the call of his name by the two that pulled him from his ridiculous thoughts of his friend. Catching up to the two that waited for him, apologizing and pushing away the thought of Shirou’s lips like that. He never entertained such thoughts about the canine and he wasn’t about to start now, not when he still had Norio on his mind.

The silence between them grew once again as they slowed and came to a stop in front of a house. ’No doubt belonging to Shirou and his family’, he mused to himself before following the two through the gate and up the short walk way, the few steps and stopped before the door. Shirou fished for his keys in his bag, he kept his gaze away from the canine and instead, watched Oushou, who was watching Shirou.

‘He has it bad,’ a thought before the startled sound Shirou made when he found his keys. Door unlocked, the two following Shirou inside, shoes removed before following their host up the stairs. The two ahead of him knew the way, leaving him to trail behind once again, not that he minded. It gave him a chance to take in the different scents that assaulted him. Monkeys with an underlining hint of the canine, that belonged to Shirou alone. Finding himself licking his upper lip in a way to taste the air, trying to taste the scent that lingered in the air. He didn’t see the dirty look Oushou shot to him from over his shoulder, only the possessive sound from the older male’s chest.

“There’s no need to get so possessive of him, I’m not going after him.” He kept his amusement to himself, watching dark eyes narrow at him before entering after Shirou.

Oushou watched the younger male give him a smile, infuriating, as if his goal in life was just to taunt him with what he didn’t have. Just like Madarame. He didn’t believe a word that Hidekuni had said to him, wouldn’t trust a word coming from the blond’s mouth when he denied being interested in Shirou. He saw the look that the younger male had given Shirou, saw the way he licked at his upper lip, tasting the air for more of the scent that Shirou was giving off. He knew Shirou’s secret. knew and though he was hurt that Shirou never told him, he kept it to himself. Unwilling to let on that he knew. Oh, Madarame had tried to chase him away and almost successfully too. But when Madarame screwed up, he was there to take advantage of the situation and pick up the pieces of Shirou’s broken heart.

He didn’t like the competition that the blond presented him, didn’t want to give another male a chance to sniff and take away the one he loved. A glance around the familiar room, devoid of Madarame’s scent, leaving behind only the scent that belonged to Shirou and his family. Taking a seat on the bed, like he normally did when he came over, enjoying the way his friend’s scent seemed to wash over him as he shifted to get comfortable. Hoping to hide the shudder that ran through his body at the teasing the scent gave him. Just a hint, just enough to get him riled up and get lost in the memories he had of sharing this bed when they were kids when he’d sleep over. Promising himself that he would make his best friend his bride and nothing his mother would say would stop him.

he still thought that way and with Madarame screwing things up for himself, it paved a way to make his dreams come true. Still, a glance at the chatting blond, the laughing smile and the way Shirou seemed to be taken with him left him with a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. As if he was going to regret knowing the younger man. Not wanting to feel left out, he spoke up.

“Shirou, have you heard anything back from the colleges that you applied to?” An innocent question, one that would ease the tension he felt. Looking up to see a small smile on his friend’s face before the sadness that had been filling up Shirou’s gray eyes disappeared.

“Yes, two of the three that I interviewed for sent letters to let me know that I’ve been accepted.”

When Shirou rattled off the names of the two universities, he couldn’t being a little shocked. His eyes widened and gritted his teeth with Hidekuni spoke up.

“That’s really close to where I’m staying.”

He didn’t like Shirou turning his attention to the younger male, didn’t like seeing his friend give attention to others while he had the urge to monopolize the male’s attention. But what he really didn’t like, couldn’t stand the sight of Shirou’s expression lighting up with excitement and the words that he over heard.

“Did you think about what I asked you earlier?”

He leaned in closer, wanting to know more. Eyes that were lit up just a minute before looked away, a silent sigh leaving Shirou’s lips. ”Despite what Madarame says, I am going to help you, Hidekuni-kun.” Though Shirou’s words were soft, almost in a hesitant way, it was easy to hear the finalization in his words. Frowning at this, he didn’t know what Shirou was talking about and leaned in even further.

“What are you helping him with?” He couldn’t help but asking, tired of leaning in and got off the bed, moving closer to the two that sat on the floor.

Shirou turned to his friend and could see the hope that Oushou carried, still carried after confessing his feelings so long ago before seeing the nod that Hidekuni gave him, giving him permission to tell him. After all, it wasn’t a secret.

“Ma-Madarame didn’t want me helping Hidekuni-kun in school, but I decided to help him. He’s staying here for several years and needs help with several things that he doesn’t know just yet.” Mentioning what Yonekuni talked about hurt more than what he thought it would. He wasn’t as thick as others thought he was, he knew what Yonekuni and the girl were doing in the classroom after he left.

When his words trailed off, the silence thickened to the point of being uncomfortable, making him want to get up and distract away from the silent pain he was feeling. Making a move to get to his feet, it was the hands on his shoulders, one from both of them that stopped him. The presence on each side of him, his friends offering and giving him their silent support while he closed his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

He watched the door close behind Shirou, wanting nothing more than to call out to the wolf, beg him to stay while he pushed away the girl he had fucked after the Christmas party. Wanted so much to have Shirou kneeling before him, to continue what he had started. But the middleweight dog that she was had dug her claws into him, refusing to let go, no matter what he said. A heavy sigh when he felt the delicate hand of the girl on him, remindg him of how much he had screwed things up so far.

His lips parted when his heated flesh hit the cool air of the classroom, hissing at the moist touch to his skin. Eyes closing, imagining that it was Shirou on his knees, like before. Would the wolf’s mouth be as hot as he imagined? Would his boyfriend give him teasing touches? Trail his fingers along his skin while he was taken inside, tormenting him with different feelings. Or would Shirou dive straight into it? Silently cursing himself for pushing the heavyweight away when it could be the wolf doing this to him right now. With his eyes closed and his head bowed, he didn’t see nor did he hear the door open, so caught up in the fantasy of Shirou doing this to him, he didn’t realize that he had groaned out Shirou’s name. He could only imagine, in his mind’s eye, the pleased look Shirou would wear. Cheeks dusted with a blush and a smile twitching at his lips.

Aching with want. Maybe his body would tremble, waiting for a relieving touch from him. Would Shirou wait for him to touch him or would the canine take matters into his own hands? Sliding hands down, unintenionally giving him a show that he would enjoy. It was the strong sting of a hand against his cheek, knocking his head to the side and pulling him from his daydreams of Shirou blowing him and of wanting him. A glare down at the girl who knelt between his legs, her hand still raised while she trembled with anger.

“How dare you utter another’s name, let along a guy’s name, while I’m doing this to you?”

Closing his eyes, he couldn’t argue with what she said. Though he didn’t like it, she was right but that didn’t mean he had to admit it. In a gentle tone, he tried to calm her as much as he could.

“You’re not my girlfriend. You’re sweet, I’ll give you that, but we’re not together and we will never be.”

The silence that followed his words became thick with tension, watching as the blond girl swallowed hard at his words, shaking her head. “That can’t be true! You gave me so much attention during the party and now that you’re saying that we’ll never be together? NO! I won’t accept it!”. Swallowing the sound of frustration, he wouldn’t have this sort of problem wtih Shirou, ignoring the pang he felt from the thought. If he told the wolf something like this, the canine would sit back. Disappointed, sure. But he would follow his words, would leave him alone if it was ordered of him. Watching the girl get up off the floor, a dirty look shot towards him and clothes rearranged, stalking out of the room while muttering under her breath, he could only catch a few words, wincing at the slam of the door. Glancing down at his now limp flesh, tucking himself back into his pants before zipping his clothing close and standing, grabbing his bag while pushing his chair to his desk. Rubbing away the perspiration off his forehead, making sure that things were settled back into place, the way they should be before walking out of the classroom.

The small hope that Shirou would have waited for him outside the door died when he looked around, the hallway empty save himself. With his bag over his shoulder and his hands shoved in his pockets, he walked down the hall and to the stairs, down the stairs, one step at a time while fingering the phone in his pocket, willing the device to ring. Down at his shoe locker, easily slipping his school shoes off and his outside shoes one, jacket pulled out and slipping it on, his bag returning to his shoulder. Fingers encircling the phone as he pushed past the double doors of the school and into the courtyard. Despite the heavy jacket he wore, he could feel the chill of the wind as it blew through him and by the time he reached the stairs to the apartment he shared with Kunimasa, the cold had finally taken hold of him. The walk up the stairs seemed to take longer than usual, each footstep a struggle and as he reached the landing, the front door opening up startled him out of the stupor that he was in.

Heat of the apartment seemed to welcome and call him, urging him inside and the one glance his brother gave him before hauling him inside, the front door slamming close. Wincing at the sound and the loud grumbling his brother gave, the curses under his breath. Words he didn’t understand, being taken towards the large couch in the living room before the sound of the heater being set higher and a blanket wrapped around him. Almost reminding him of when he woke up in the infirmary with Kunimasa and Noririn.

“How the hell did you get like this?” A voice from behind. His brother, the agitation in his voice was easy to pick up. ”And why isn’t Fujiwara with you? If it’s this cold out, he should be by your side to keep you warm.”

Ahh, that’s right. Kunimasa had no clue what was going on between them. He still thought that he and Fujiwara were dating and though they were, it wasn’t as intense as it used to be, when he wouldn’t leave the wolf’s side. Times like this, wishing that he hadn’t left the male’s side for another. ”He’s-, well,” he cursed himself for stuttering before telling his brother what was really going on between him and Shirou, since the nekomata would figure it out later and scold him enough later on. ”We’re not really “Together” right now. I’m not exactly sure how I feel about him, about him being the wrong gender.”

The click of a tongue, a sound that the jaguar made when he was annoyed with him. A sound that annoyed him, though he didn’t voice his annoyance, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from saying what was coming to his mind. ”I can guess what happened, Yonekuni. You’ve been around that dog again, haven’t you?” His back stiffened, knowing that his brother was right. And he knew that Kunimasa would most likely tell Noririn about what was going on with him, ever since his brother caught him with the girl a few weeks ago. Though he told his brother that he wouldn’t see her again, he did see her and got caught once again, by Shirou no less. With his brother telling Noririn, he would get an ear ful from the lightweight, especially when Shirou and Noririn had become close friends.

“Don’t you dare tell Noririn.” He managed to say, pulling blanket closer while his brother pushed away from him, a blank look on his face. ”You should be getting warm enough, now.” His brother offered as he gather his things, hand on the doorknob. ”Yonekuni, I’ll support you no matter what, you’re my brother. But if you continue to treat Fujiwara this way, you’ll lose him and you’ll have no one but yourself to blame.”

Keeping his head down and away from the knowing look his brother had after saying that. He was handling things badly again, unaware that others had picked up on what was going on between him and Shirou. And know that they knew, they were on the move to get close to what was his. Once the front door closed behind Kunimasa, he pushed away from the couch. Blanket still wrapped around him, he headed towards his bedroom that would usually beckon him. Once, there was a time that Shirou’s scent could be found on his bed. Lingering on his skin even, caressing hands slipping down and inside, feeling flesh start to twitch under his touch. The rapid breathing that hitched under his soon to be lover’s breath while his fingers curled around the rapidly swelling flesh. Pulling his hand free, his senses lulling him to give it.

It was easy to recall the memory of staring down at the wolf. Watching eyes well up as the canine told him that he loved him. The feel of tight heat clenching around him, driving him crazy with want and desire. A brief tough to the cool sheets, his own scent reaching his nose. Almost hollow, when not just half a year ago he held the wolf in his arms and felt whole. He shouldn’t dwell on what he had chosen, Shirou promising to wait for him.

Towards the bathroom to start a hot bath, he resolved to get closer to the wolf without Shirou knowing it.

Under the steam of the hot water, closing his eyes to those memories of the night. Skin sliding against soft sheets when Shirou tried to obey the order he gave so he could explore every expanse of the pale body before him. The way the form below him trembled under the soft glow of the lamp on the nightstand next to the bed. Finding sensitive spots on Shirou’s body, first with his fingertips and then, with his lips, watching the male shiver with pleasure. When his hand reached the one thing that intimidated him, he could remember pausing and hesitating before completely bypassing Shirou’s cock. Eyes seemed to waver, full of feelings that he felt ashamed to be on the receiving end of them that he could only look away when hurt started to creep inside them. It took all his willpower to force his hand up and curl around the jutting flesh. It was well worth the internal struggle, the sight of hands clawing at the bed and the way teeth bit down on his lower lip to stop the gasp of his name.

His hand slipped down under the hot water, curling around himself and with quick strokes, a twist of his wrist while biting down on his lower lip, brought himself off. Eyes slowly opening, a name on the tip of his tongue and the skip of his heart. His hand a pale imitation of his memories, nothing like what he actually wanted. He knew graduation was quickly approaching and though he had passed the exams, he hadn’t done anything else. It never occurred to him to him to ask Shirou where he planned to go and if he even applied. Swallowing as he reached for the soap, washing up dispite having came in the water. He didn’t know what Shirou wanted to do, the closeness that they had only months ago seemed to vanish, almost reverting to the way treated each other after that one night.

At the sound of his cellphone going off, a sound under his breath that resembled both a sigh and a curse, he pushed himself to leave the hot water. A towel used to dry his body and hair, while another was used to wrap around he made the short walk from the bathroom to his room, ignoring his phone in favor of getting dressed before turning to his phone, which now lay silent. A flip and a bit out curse, missing Shirou’s call and a text message he received from the girl who slapped him earlier. Words blurred on the small screen, accusing and angry, demanding to know who else he was going out with. He gave a chuckle, it wasn’t any of her business who he was sleeping with, it was only his business and though he knew it was Shirou’s business as well, he didn’t think of it like that. Never bothering to answer the text and instead, attempting to return Shirou’s phone call.

“Madarame?” Came Shirou’s voice, low after the third ring. He gave a silent sigh of relief when he heard the male’s voice, almost afraid that Shirou wouldn’t answer his call, as if the male was trying to avoid him. As if he knew what he was doing.

“Look, are you busy tomorrow?” He asked, glancing at the calendar that hung on the wall, above his desk. Bought on a whim at the start of the new year, one he hadn’t used but now, was glad that he had it. Waiting for Shirou’s answer, hearing muffled sounds from the background, as if Shirou had others with him. In his bedroom. The swell in his chest rose up, jealousy eating at him like never before. His mind working to figure out who was with Shirou, alone with him in his bedroom.

“Madarame? I’m a little busy, but you can join us tomorrow.”

The reply he was waiting for, wasn’t that. ’Us’, which means that Shirou would be busy with others, with someone that wasn’t him.

“Madarame?”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, I’ll be there.”

He swallowed back the words that wanted to ask who Shirou was with. Wanted to know why Shirou was making plants with friends while it was their day off, when it could be just them. Barely hearing the farewell that his boyfriend gave, the buzzing of the dial tone telling him that it was time to hang up. Pulling his phone away from his ear, staring at the screen before deciding to hang up. It wouldn’t be any use to stare at the phone.

Was it wrong of him to thing that things would go smoothly for him, thinking that Shirou would want to spend time alone with him, just hours before he needed to leave, meeting Shirou at his house. Instead of being with Shirou, being alone with him and now having to share the wolf. He never did share well with others, let alone his partner of choice, though he held his tongue his tongue when he had talked to the heavyweight on the phone. Locking the apartment behind him, his brother most likely in bed with Noririn in his arms. Sleeping peacefully with dreams of a turture that was set to happen while he himself, muddled in his present.

Was he jealous of how smoothly things were going for his younger brother? If someone was to ask him, he would most likely deny it, but knew that deep in his heart he was. The ease of how Kunimasa had accepted that his future wife was male. While he, on the other hand, couldn’t get over the fact that the one who loved him, loved him for so long was male. He couldn’t get over Shirou being male and yet, he couldn’t let the wolf go. Didn’t want to let go of what his body desperately needed and wanted. Didn’t want others to get close while he was unsure.

His footsteps, while he was lost in his thoughts, had lead him to the train platform of the train station. The chill in the air seemed to linger as he waited for the sound of the train to arrive, stepping on and into the warmth that the machine provided, though he could live without the smell of others and monkeys around him. Barely remembering the train ride, feeling the heated looks girls and woman alike. From the small group of four to the left of him, school girls around his age to the few office ladies that sat just feet for him. Pushing away the feeling of wanting to push out his chest in pride, the fact that he could lure females out made him feel above the others. Untouchable.

A kind smile on his lips as one of the school girls broke away from her friends and approached him. His eyes and nose could easily pick up on her willingness to fuck, the pheromones that she let out, urging and cajoling him to take her. The brief introduction, the slip of paper handed to him that most likely held her name and phone number. And everything was forgotten, his plans for the day and the one waiting for him.

He lost himself in the pleasure the girl offered him, the welcoming heat that was nothing but a pale comparison to what he wanted. It was the sound of distant ringing that had him pulling away from the girl, with her pug like soul on display. By the time he made it to his phone, it was that of a beep that announced a message. The name displayed of the call he missed and the message, from not Shirou, but his younger brother. Expecting to have a voice message, it was the scrolling screen on his phone with the words:

Too bad you missed out, maybe next time.

He could only pause in both his footsteps and his thoughts. What was Hidekuni doing with Shirou? His warning to the nekomata should have been enough and the jaguar had proclaimed that he wasn’t interested in the wolf. A glance at the time on his phone told him that he should have met the heavyweight a long time ago. Over his shoulder, catching the wink the dog gave him before she too, continued on her way.

Taking his time to return to the train station, doing quick calculations in his head, trying to figure out how many stops he was from the one he actually needed to get off. A lick at his lips, feeling them swollen and sore, smirking to himself on the inside and wondering how he was going to hide what he had been doing from the one waiting for him. The announcement over head of the arriving train, stepping back to let those off before stepping inside. The middle of the day, the rush of workers and and students alike hadn’t even started, leaving him with in the car with only a small handful of people that paid him no mind. Though he was looking out the window of the train, he didn’t see the passing scenery. His only thought was how he was going to explain why he didn’t show up when he said he would. Phone in his pocket, pushing away the guilt of sleeping and fucking another while he was with Shirou. they weren’t exclusive, though he did expect Shirou to be, so he was aloud to be with anyone he wanted, right?

The overhead announcement of the upcoming station, bracing himself as the train slowed down its approach. It was when he chanced a look to the car to his right, narrowing his eyes at the three while his hands clenched in in anger. The few that shared the car with him hurried out as soon as the doors opened. A deep breath, calming or at least, attempting to calm the emotions that raged inside him, telling himself that it wasn’t what he thought it was. Of course Shirou wouldn’t stray from him, didn’t like the thought of others attempting to get close to the wolf. He didn’t want to entertain such thoughts of Shirou becoming interested in someone other than him.

He moved quickly, footsteps swift as he weaved through the throngs of people that waited to board towards the group of three as they left the train car, watching the dark head turn towards him. Gray eyes seemed to light up as he got closer, but dimmed quickly when the male breathed deeply, the sigh that was meant to be silent was heard by him and the others, watching the two that flanked Shirou’s side narrow their eyes at him.

“What are you doing with them?” A jerk of his head towards Oushou and Hidekuni, ignoring the dirty looks that the middleweight snake and the heavyweight cat sent him, only focusing on Shirou in front of him. The forced smile that was easy to spot as a fake smile before the wolf murmured, “Well, they’re helping me look for a place to live, Madarame.”

Swallowing hard, his hand shot out to grab Shirou by the wrist, fingerings tightening to prevent the heavyweight from trying to escape. Pulling Shirou away from the small group and towards the bathroom, forcing the wolf inside before blocking the door with his body. ”What the fuck are you talking about “looking for a place to live?” What does that have to do with cavorting with those two?” It seemed that with every word he spoke, it was spoken softly and yet, harsh as Shirou flinched.

“They’re my friends and they’re helping me look for a place when I start College.”

The blank look on his face before his eyes widened.

“Y-you honestly forgot about applying for college?” Shirou asked, rubbing his sore wrist. How could he forget about that? ”Then why didn’t you tell me? That you’ve applied to several schools?” He asked, running his hand through his hair in exasperation. Honestly, the male before him was just a little too thick sometimes. It was his words that had him biting his tongue, cursing himself for not listening.

“But I did try, Madarame. Several times in fact. But each time I did, you seemed to brush me off, as if you didn’t want to listen to what I had to say.” Shirou explained, just as frustrated as he felt. ”In fact, I left you several voice mails just a few weeks ago and you never responded to them.” Shirou’s head lifted and gray eyes that were always warm and welcoming to him seemed now hesitant and guarded. ”I wanted you to come with us today to look at apartments that were close to the university that I was accepted to. I value your opinion on certain matters, such as this, but it seemed you had different priorities than helping me.”

Opening his mouth to defend himself, but the hand that Shirou held up stopped him, as if the heavyweight wasn’t finished. ”You don’t have to make excuses, Madarame. I know what you were up to just hours ago,” a small laugh that sounded almost like a sob, “you reek of perfume, though different from the normal scent you’re covered in.” Shirou stepped closer, raising his hand as if to touch him. He wanted, almost longed for the touch but none came, seeing Shirou reach for the handle of the bathroom door.

“I told you yesterday that I’ll wait for you. But please remember, I can’t wait forever.”

The pain in those words tugged at his heart, pushing away the guilt that rose up. He knew he shouldn’t string Shirou along, but the thought of letting the male go wasn’t an option.

“We’re going out tomorrow again. If you want to join us, you’re more than welcome to join us, Madarame. But we won’t wait around for you.” He watched as Shirou moved around him, forcing him to move away from the door. He could hear the worry in both Oushou’s and Hidekuni’s voice and the way Shirou tried to placate the two with soft words. One of them must have said something, that husky laugh that he hadn’t heard in so long before the voices died down. Pulling open the door, his stride quick as he caught up with the three, spotting his brother laying a hand on Shirou’s elbow, as if to guide the male away.

He found himself pushing between the Jaguar and the wolf, ignoring the protesting sound from Shirou and the dirty look his younger brother sent him. ”Keep your hands off him,” a growl like order, “he’s not yours.” Giving his soul a brief flare in warning, watching Hidekuni stand his ground, unaffected by his little show of dominance.

“He’s not your’s either, Big Brother,” Hidekuni drawled out as he stood to his full height and jutting out his chin, “he’s his own person and even if you think of him as yours, he doesn’t even carry your scent claim. He’s up for grabs for someone who is interested.” He watched, eyes narrowing at him, knowing those words weren’t just for his benefit, but for the middleweight that flanked Shirou’s side. Gritting his teeth in anger, knowing his brother was right, he never bothered to reinforce the scent claim he had on the wolf, letting what scent Shirou carried deteriorate to nothingness. ”He’s allowed to have friends, even if you don’t like them touching him, it’s their and his right. And unless you proclaim him as yours…”

The words trailed off, leaving him to actually say something that would prove that Shirou was his. A look over to the wolf, the hopeful look in gray eyes had his heart pounding and swallowing past the lump in his throat. The begging he saw in Shirou’s eyes, only seeing them once before had him wanting to do nothing more then to show Hidekuni and that middleweight just who Shirou belong to. He did nothing of the sort, though and instead, glanced away for now. The triumphant grin the blond wore had his hands curling into fists at his sides. The disappointed look and the forced smile was back before the wolf excused himself away from the group, saying goodbye to Hidekuni and Oushou. Not a word to him. From the platform, he watched Shirou descend the steps back straight and head held high.

“I don’t know what your problem is Madarame or whatever problem that’s going on between you and Shirou, but let him go if you’re not serious about him. Don’t string him along with empty promises.”

Turning his gaze towards the speaker, bored and uninterested in what Shirou’s friend had to say. At least, that was his outwardly expression while on the inside, his soul seethed with anger at the words the middleweight spoke. How dare he tell him what to do.

“What? You think we don’t know how you’re treating Shirou? Seeing and fucking others while he waits for you?” A shake of a dark head and the flare that was given off. ”No? I thought that you’d treat Shirou like the way he should be treated. He’s open for anyone to court him now.”

A smirk sent to him before Oushou left him behind to catch up to Shirou, leaving him behind with his younger brother.

“You’ll lose him one of these days and it’ll be no one’s fault but your own.” Disappointment filled Hidekuni’s voice as the jaguar shook his head. ”Would you be able to get through the day knowing that Shirou lays in another’s arms? That he may love someone other then you?” With those words, he was left alone, just steps from the platform. A quick look around, a sigh of relief when no one paid attention of the conversation he had with the three.

He knew he should take Hidekuni’s warning to heart, but it was hard to imagine Shirou giving up on him. Of the wolf loving another. The heavyweight did say that he’d wait for him and he would hold Shirou to that promise. It wouldn’t do him any good to follow the group of three, not with Shirou being that angry and sad. Ignoring the few had overheard them, the shaking of their heads had him holding his head high. He wouldn’t show them that their gossip bothered him and really, it didn’t. But when they began to speculate who would end up with Shirou, he shot them a glare that had them scurrying away until the train arrived.

By the time he reached home, his mood soured to the point that he shot Noririn a withering look when he inquired about Shirou. Almost snapping that it wasn’t any of his business, the dirty look his brother shot him had him snapping his mouth close.

“Don’t take your anger out on Norio, Yonekuni,” Kunimasa warned his other brother, “if you’re angry, do something to fix it.” He leveled a look at the blond. He had a good idea about what happened earlier, from what Hidekuni had related to him during a phone call not too long ago. Needing to stay neutral in this whole mess, he couldn’t help but feel sorry for Fujiwara. The last time he talked to the canine, having to lie about Yonekuni’s location. The pain that the male was trying to hide, the friendly, almost broken smile ate at him. He never told Yonekuni, noticing others taking notice and interest in Fujiwara, keeping it from both his brother and Norio.

Only watching Yonekuni snarl to himself before the blond stalked to his room, followed by a slam of the bedroom door. A shake of his head before pulling the small cat in his arms. ”What was that all about?” The muffled question, one he couldn’t answer without giving away what he knew. Instead, he tipped Norio’s head to steal lips. A sharp nip that had the lightweight inhaling and a chuckle before pulling the cat towards his room.

~

Laying on his bed with his back to the bedroom door, Yonekuni fought with himself all the while rolling Hidekuni’s words over and over in his head. Eyes slipping close as he slowly lost himself in his thoughts and memories. Sometime later, waking from a fantasy like dream, reaching out to pull the male into the curve of his body. Frowning when he felt cool and empty sheets, sleepy eyes looking around for a hint of his missing lover before remembering that Shirou wasn’t there with him. That he hadn’t been with him in such a long time.

Sitting up, he didn’t have to look at the clock to know that the sun had gone down some time ago before leaning back against the headboard. Shifting and reaching down, the echoes of his dreams. The fantasy that he dreamt about, his hand slipping down his chest and down further, coming to a rest against the slowly growing bulge that seemed to throb with every beat of his heart. The broad back that seemed dotted with his marks, dark hair tossed and messed as the male moved back on and against him, taking him deeper. The panting of his name, the passion and emotions as Shirou looked over his shoulder at him.

His fingers making quick work of the fastening of his pants, staring down at himself in the dark. Eeasily making out his fingers curled around his hard cock, the fluid that started to bead at the tip before a swipe of his thumb smeared it away. Closing his eyes, losing himself in his memories of the one night he laid with the wolf. Thinking what could be if he just pushed Shirou against the wall and show him what he wanted. Hoping that the wolf would welcome him with open arms, let him sink home. Body tensing, hand milking himself, he wondered as he stared down at his cum stained hand, how Shirou would look covered in his seed.

~

He found himself leaving the apartment earlier than he planned, determined not to let anyone deter him from getting to Shirou’s home and back to the male’s side. To find out what his boyfriend was up to with that middleweight and his brother. A glance at his watch while he took the steps of the train station two at a time, Shirou didn’t say what time they’d be meeting up, but he wasn’t about to take any chances of letting the two upstage him in any way. With his jacket pulled closer to his body, he tried to keep his mind away from his activities from the night before, boarding the train, he kept his gaze away from those who moved close to him. Every breath he took, tasting the pheromones the females around him were giving off. Tightening his hold on the pole in front of him, resisting the urge to give in.

Counting down the stops as the train neared the one stop that he was waiting for, giving a sigh of relief when the announcement over head and the slowing of the train. Stepping off the train and ‘Away from temptation,’ he thought, proud of himself for not giving in to the urge to take one or two home with him. Slipping his hand in his pocket, fingering his phone in a way that he recognized as anticipation, as if he was willing the device to ring for him. Maybe with the hopes that the wolf would reach out to him, like he used to earlier in their relationship. More open.

Pulling his jacket closer as he walked down the street, catching the scent of a hot drink that had him stopping in at a small coffee shop, feeling a little ping in his chest. Almost a longing for a dream he didn’t have. Placing his order, glancing around the shop and for some reason, he could place the shop in his dreams. Of them, him and Shirou together, a little child between them, one who looked like him and yet, carried the soul similar to Shirou. The call of his order, taking the hot drink carefully before heading outside, his steps strong as he pushed the ideas from his dreams away, his imagination getting away from him.

By the time he reached the familiar house, the hot drink he held now was almost gone, looking up to the second story window with the hopes of seeing Shirou looking out the window. He tried to tell himself that he wasn’t disappointed when he didn’t see the male at the window as he opened the gate and walked up the pathway that lead to the door. With a quick, brief knock on the door, stepping back when he heard Shirou call out, opening the door.

“Madarame?”

The hesitant look, the smile that teased at lips that would look better swollen. ”Yo-you actually came?”

Scratching the back of his neck, feeling flushed at the pleased look, only to drop his hand when he caught sight of the two that seemed to constantly flank the heavyweight’s side.

“You actually came.”

He swallowed back the demand to know why his brother and that middleweight were there so early, but the happiness that Shirou’s voice had that he kept the question at bay. ”I’m not late, am I?” He nodded his head in the direction of Oushou and Hidekuni. The shake of a dark head before stepping back.

“No, they just showed up a few minutes ago. Come in, I planned to make some breakfast before we leave.”

Stepping inside the warm house, the silence seemed to thicken as Oushou gave him the same look he gave him the day before while his younger brother just gave him a nod. ’They weren’t expecting me to show up,’ he thought to himself before toeing off his shoes and removing his jacket, hanging it up in place next to Shirou’s jacket. Eyes seemed to take in the wolf’s back, following the heavyweight into the kitchen, taking a seat at the table, only to watch Oushou sit opposite of him while his brother followed Shirou into the kitchen.

“What are you after, Madarame?”

The hiss had him turning his attention from Hidekuni and Shirou to Oushou, watching the dark haired snake curl his fingers along the table top, as if he was trying to dig his nails into the hard wood.

“I told you yesterday that if you’re not serious about Shirou, let him go. Do you know how hurt he was when you showed up yesterday with the small of nekomata? He said that you’d rather be with a girl than help him pick out a place to live.” Eyes widening, the satisfied smile on the middleweight’s face had him doing what Oushou had been doing earlier, curling his fingers along the table top before curling around the edge of the table while trying to keep his temper in check.

“What? You didn’t know?” The brief chuckle before a glare followed. ”He’s been accepted to the university of his choice and we spent yesterday looking at apartments.” The look said it all, turning his head, watching the two interact. The brushing of shoulders as one chopped and the other one saw to the stove, stirring in what the other chopped. All too soon, the smell of what the two were coming up with reached them. Easily seeing the closeness that was growing between his brother and the wolf had him biting his tongue in attempts not to say something that he would regret. He always knew Shirou was one to make and keep friends easily, his brother was no exception. But what Hidekuni told him yesterday, the haunting words seemed to echo in his mind.

“-after him, you know?” After who? Shirou? Who was after the wolf? He could only ask himself, he couldn’t turn and ask the other male to repeat what he just said, not wanting to show Oushou that he wasn’t paying attention to what he was saying.

“So Shirou, did you decide which apartment you liked? Or are we going out searching again?” Oushou asked, the knowing look that the snake wore was gone, replaced by genuine curiosity. A dark head lifted, looking over at Oushou, a brief glance his way before the wolf’s attention was back on Oushou.

“Well, I’ve got an idea on one of them, but I want to see others before I make a choice.” He caught the nod Shirou gave Hidekuni, as if there was a secret between the cat and the dog. A secret that he knew he wouldn’t like.

Breakfast was eaten in silence that seemed strained to him, though he knew it was because the three were talking of a subject he didn’t know. Feeling the heated glances that were sent his way, looking up to catch on from Shirou. The heat in gray eyes sent a shiver running through him and for one brief moment, he wished that he was the only one with the heavyweight. All he could do was force his body to calm down, sending a look in return, watching in satisfaction as the male seemed to squirm in his seat, as if he too, were wishing that they were alone.

With the kitchen cleaned from the mess Shirou and Hidekuni had made, jackets slipped on and house locked up, he walked side by side with Shirou. The two behind him, a few steps back, seemed to be talking amongst themselves and when he was sure that Oushou and Hidekuni wouldn’t hear him, he asked the question that had been bugging him since that phone call two days ago. Shoulder bumping against the wolf’s, looking ahead as he spoke.

“Why are they helping you? In fact, why do they know about you going the University that you want and not me?” He thought his question was honest and straight to the point. He should have been the first one to hear where Shirou wanted to go, should be the first one to know that Shirou was accepted. He should have been the first person, behind the male’s parents of course, to hear the news about everything. ”And why were they in your bedroom with you? They shouldn’t even step foot in there.” A brush of a hand against his as they walked, turning his attention to the dark head that was bowed.

“I was going to tell you, right after Christmas, of where I planned to apply, as well tell you that I’ve been accepted. But you seemed busy with someone else, almost every time I try to tell you.” His eyes widened at the words, Shirou knew? He bit his lip to hold back any the protest he wanted to make as Shirou continued. ”As for Oushou and Hidekuni-kun knowing and being in the room with me, they’re my friends. Oushou knows because he’s going to the same university as me. He might be rooming with me for the duration of school, but that’s up in the air. Hidekuni-kun’s been keeping in touch with me since Christmas. He’s going to be helping and teaching me English in exchange for helping him with his studies.”

His words trailed off, keeping his gaze away from Yonekuni and on the path straight of head, to Oushou and Hidekuni, before returning back to the path.

“I thought you were just going to help him with your studies, nothing more.” Catching the irritation in Yonekuni’s voice, holding back the sigh. If only the blond would tell him, not leave him guessing about what he wanted.

“Well, it was just going to be helping, but when I mentioned that I wanted to transcribe literature and fiction, he mentioned that I needed to be fluent in English. And though I’ve got more than the basics down, he says I need more and offered to teach me.” He smiled to himself, remembering the bright look the jaguar wore when he spoke, the answer in English.

“Well, why didn’t you ask me then?”

He took a moment to answer, weighing his words carefully. ”I didn’t know you were fluent in English, Madarame-” He caught himself, glancing up at the blond’s face, “Yonekuni. Besides, you don’t seem to have any time for me anymore. I’m even surprised that you joined us today.” A bitter smile crossed his face, “Especially since you didn’t come with us yesterday.”

“About that-” Heart clenching, he didn’t want to hear the excuse, whatever reason the blond had for showing up and smelling strongly of perfume..

“You made it perfectly clear of what you want, Yonekuni. I told you before that I’ll wait for you. But I can’t wait forever.” He glanced up, the set jaw and tense body had him regretting his words, but he knew they needed to be said. ”Anyway, I’m ready to pick the apartment.”

“Why does your friend have to be your roommate?” He could easily pick up on the hints of jealousy and desperation that seemed to litter in the innocent question.

“It hasn’t even been decided, we’ve only talked about it.” Shirou offered, taking the steps up to the platform. ”Would you be comfortable rooming with me anytime soon?” He left the question hanging, knowing the truth, as much as it hurt to admit it to himself. The silence that normally would be comfortable between them was now strained and uncomfortable. He used to pride himself in being able to read the blond. Now, though, he wished he couldn’t. The body language told him more than enough, that Yonekuni was uncomfortable being in his presence. But it was what he said that shocked him.

“Just because I don’t know how I feel right now, it doesn’t mean I want to share you with others. Even your friends.” The small confession gave him hope. Was Yonekuni becoming comfortable with him? Was he regretting sleeping with those girls? The rational part of his mind told him not to get his hopes up, that a leopard doesn’t change it spots. A look away from one blond to another, catching the look send to him from Hidekuni. The frown and narrowing of eyes before a shake of a head and a smile, on that asked “Everything okay?” Smiling in return, he nodded.

From apartment to apartment, building to building, narrowing down the choices before coming to a decision. He stared down at his food while Shirou chatted to the person to his left. The casual brushes that his friend offered, most likely not knowing what it was doing to him. Gripping his chopsticks tightly in his hand, chewing on his lower lip. He had heard the words Shirou had said to Madarame, about him being Shirou’s roommate and the question. He desperately wanted to be with his friend. To be free to touch soft skin and find out why his soul seemed to sing when he felt the heated touch

He hadn’t brought up the idea with his mother, not with her problem with his brother and his new family. The prejudice that she had against monkeys, if she were to find out that the one he wanted to be with one, he would be disinherited from the family. Still, having thought about it for so long, it would be worth it. Taking a bite of his lunch, glancing up at Madarame, who seemed to be sulking, making a sound under his breath once he finished eating. The blond heavyweight made it clear from the start that he didn’t want them there, even though he was the reason for them being there in the first place. The pain in his friend’s eyes, not only two days ago, but when the blond had dared to show up yesterday, reeking of another. He wasn’t blind, easily picking up on the interest that the younger one had and though the heavyweight cat just claimed that he wasn’t interest in Shirou that way, he wasn’t stupid. Something seemed to draw others to his best friend.

“Right, Oushou?” His head jerked up, realizing they were talking and had asked him a question.

“Y-yeah.” Agreeing to a question he had no clue what had been asked.

“You see, Hidekuni-kun, it’ll be the right choice in picking the first apartment.”

He smiled to himself, that was the first apartment they had looked up yesterday. The two bedroom apartment, open and inviting, just blocks from the university. Pricey, he knew, paid by Shirou’s parents for the male’s graduation gift. If he wasn’t allowed to room with his friend, he could at least crash there during the week. Smiling to himself, catching the dark look Madarame shot him, making him smile even more.

~

It would be time, their lives moving on in different directions. ’Which would usually happen when friends grew up,’ Shirou thought to himself, looking around the empty apartment. Pulling off the gloves he wore, cleaning up what was left behind by the previous owners and what was missed by the cleaning crew just days ago. Having been handed the keys just two days ago, showing his parents the apartment later that day. The warm smiles soothed the anxiety that he felt, the lack of contact from Yonekuni had made things worse.

He wasn’t a fool, feeling the tension when they had eaten lunch together last week, the abrupt departure of Yonekuni as they talked. His calls ignored, pushing away the pain of rejection as he prepared to move on to the next stage in his life. The silence of the empty apartment would take some getting used to, it was the sound of a knock on the door that pulled him from his thoughts. Unlocking the door, the familiar blond hair and welcoming smile sent an uncomfortable flutter in his stomach, a feeling that he would have to think about later.

“Hidekuni-kun,” he smiled up at the blond, “what’re you doing here?” The light blush staining cheeks and the bottle that was held out towards him.

“I came to welcome you as a new neighbor.” The Jaguar’s voice deepened before eyes darted away, as if embarrassment.

“Neighbor? When you recommend-” He felt embarrassed, as if being caught in a trap laid by another. The door closed behind the younger mail, shoes being slipped off at the door.

“Yeah. I’m a few doors down from you. Didn’t I say that I’m really close to the university?” The sheepish words had him smiling a little, setting the bottle aside on the counter.

“You did. I’d give you a tour, but I haven’t even packed up my things at home.”

“Would you need some help then?” Hidekuni offered, watching his friend while catching the pheromones the older male was released. ”I mean, if you need a hand. And since I don’t start for a few more weeks, you could give me a hand. A-and I can help you as well.” he cursed at the stumble in his voice, trying to cover up his slip. ”Like, make start a conversation with you in English and move on from there.”

The brush of a hand on his and the smile that was sent to him, an answer to his slight request.

“Sure, Hidekuni-kun.” He gave himself a mental shake and turned away, the memory of Norio’s scent seemed to be fading from his memory and he forced himself to move, lest he start embarrassing himself.

“Should I just come by tomorrow morning?” He asked, stopping at the door to slip his shoes on before reaching for the doorknob. A look over his shoulder, seeing the nod of a dark head. ”Great! I’ll be by then.” Giving the canine a wink, closing the door behind him before resting against it. The memory of the love he had for the returner to ancestry seemed to pale as his heart pounded. No, he couldn’t feel this way about another person, not when he was already taken by his brother, of all people.

He hadn’t lied about needing help with some courses, not exactly familiar with some classes and the schooling structure that they had here, unlike back home. Maybe he was getting over his head by offering to teach Shirou English, but he couldn’t take back what he offered. He had more pride than that. A glance at his watch, wondering if Norio was busy, knowing that his brother would be upset if he dropped by to see the lightweight. A pang in his chest before pushing himself away from the door and towards home, maybe his mother would be able to help him resolve the mess he was feeling.

~

Staring up at the ceiling above his bed, not seeing the fan that moved with the blast of hot air from the vents. He hadn’t seen nor talked to the male, Shirou wasn’t showing up in class, not when they had the choice of showing up for the last couple of days. The beeping of his phone had stopped long ago, he didn’t want to answer, didn’t want to face the fact that others were interested in Shirou. Outside the locked door, he could hear the sounds of his brother and Noririn moving around, knowing he would have to wait for them to leave or slip off to Kunimasa’s bedroom if he didn’t want to answer questions he knew they’d ask. He could easily remember the lunch where he had stalked out, he was sure Shirou’s friend knew what he was thinking.

The open flirty going on in front of him, he was sure the wolf didn’t have a clue that his brother was flirting with him. They’d been talking about everything, from school to apartments when he saw the hand approaching Shirou’s hand, as if to show him something. He couldn’t voice his displeasure and instead, pushed back his chair to stalk out, shooting his younger brother a look as he tossed out his share for the food. And he hadn’t seen nor talked to the male since. Berating himself for leaving when he should have stayed, should have forced the nekomata to leave his chosen partner alone.

He missed the warmth that Shirou provided him, the comfortable feeling of coming home. He shouldn’t have run away and with that thought, he pushed himself off the bed, unlocked his bedroom door and headed to the bathroom. Shrugging off his clothes, catching a glance of his back in the mirror, the scratches on his back were slow to heal, turning away and stepping under the hot spray of the shower and wondering how long Shirou would continue to be forgiving. Washing away whatever lingering scent that could have clung to his skin, not wanting Shirou to know that he had fucked another after leaving the lunch a week ago and again, just earlier that day.

Dressed perfectly for the cool, almost cold weather, jacket heavy and pulled tight to his body to keep warm. A look at his watch as he stepped onto the train, keeping his gaze focused, his mouth shut in silence while the few that shared the train car with him gave him a wide berth, as if they knew what type of mood he was in.

Moving quickly, exiting the train as soon as it came to a slow stop, ignoring the protests of those who had expected him to wait his turn. Once again, finding himself at the house he had awoken in so long ago from his dream like state. He didn’t have to knock this time, seeing the bundled male looking at him from where he stood on the porch.

“Yonekuni?” He didn’t answer, just striding quickly up the path and pulled the male into his arms. Burying his nose against the side of the wolf’s neck and breathed deeply, unable to stop the shudder. Whether it was from arousal or the sudden heat that washed through him, he didn’t know nor did he care. Feeling the wolf stiffen in his arms, pulling away from him and pulling him inside. As soon as the door closed, attempting to pull Shirou back into his arms but the resistance the male put up had him pulling back. Why was Shirou resisting?

“Yonekuni, next time make sure that they don’t mark your neck.” The heartbreak in the heavyweight’s normally calm and soothing voice had him cursing himself. He never thought to check his neck for bite marks and hickeys, only concerned with his chest. The forced smile as Shirou turned from him, feeling a knot growing in the pit of his stomach.

“Just remember what you promised, that you’d wait for me.”

He thought he heard the male murmur “I can’t wait forever, Yonekuni.”


	3. Chapter 3

He had lost count of how many times he told himself that he shouldn’t have made such a stupid promise to Yonekuni. Now being told to hold onto it after three years later of a sluggish relationship and an excellent record and grades in his classes. Recommendations from his professors as well as the strong friendships he shared with Oushou and Hidekuni along with others he had met while attending university. The relationship he thought he would have with the blond, the thoughts he entertained when they first got together was nothing like reality.

He would have thought their relationship would have grown like Kunimasa-kun’s and Tsuburaya-kun’s relationship. The tender way the older male was around his partner, the pregnancy that had them closer then ever. If anything, his relationship with Yonekuni had reverted back to the way it used to be. But only this time, Yonekuni didn’t touch him. No pleasure from the gentle brush of a hand against him. No, the only pleasure he got nowadays was that from his own hand, his own touch.

Sure, he’d get kissed once in a while, though that seemed to be few and far in between. No, it seemed that Yonekuni only came by when he felt like it or when he wasn’t himself in the cold and rain. The pitying looks that he caught from Tsuburaya-kun or should he be referring the younger male as Madarame by now? The two having married before having their son.

There were times he had imagined the heated looks that Hidekuni-kun sent him when they were either alone or out with Oushou and friends, but he knew that it was all just in his head. After all, the jaguar had a girlfriend that was nice, though he couldn’t help the twist in his gut when he was around her. The happiness that Yonekuni’s brother had, both of his brothers had, he wanted it. He wanted what everyone else had. A shake of his head, as if to pull himself out of the self induced pity thoughts.

Turning his attention back to the books that laid in front of him as well as his notes and homework before sighing and glancing out the window. The clouds that had been building and forming over night and all that morning looked ready to unleash their fury, making him glad that he didn’t have any classes that morning. It was the rumble of thunder and the crack of lightening off into the distance that had him smiling to himself, just a little smile that was soon gone at the sound of a knock on his door. Almost coincident and he gave it no thought, about to dismiss it as his imagination when he heard the knock again, harder this time.

Setting his book to the side, he pushed himself off the seat and towards the door. Never bothering to look through the peephole , knowing that it could only be one of three people that drop by. Of course, he knew it wasn’t his parents. They were traveling the world at that moment, enjoying his father’s retirement. The sound of a click as he unlocked the door was loud, opening the door only stepping back when the form of his childhood friend tumbled into his arms. The violent shivering had him pulling Oushou into the apartment, closing the door with his free hand before leading the half conscious male further into the room.

A touch to the male’s forehead had him flinching, heat from just a touch, a fever that had him shaking his head at how Oushou made it here in one piece. Looking around his apartment, he had a spare room, but after the fuss Oushou’s mother put up when she heard that her son wanted to room with him, threatening to cut off paying for his classes that he had to withdraw the idea of staying with Shirou. It sat empty for the time being, no extra bed and no extra futon, he couldn’t put his sick friend on the couch, that lead him letting Oushou sleep in his bed. Gently urging the male towards his bedroom, pausing for a few seconds before changing direction and heading towards the bathroom.

“S-Shirou?” The harsh wheeze, dark eyes trying and failing to focus on him and instead, closing as the entered the bathroom.

“Shhh.” He whispered, urging the male to sit before reaching for the damp shirt, aware that he had the fevered male’s attention. Swallowing hard, slowly pulling off the damp shirt, soaked with both sweat and rain, though he had to guess that it was mostly sweat. Schooling his features as not to show any surprise, his hands made quick work of the damp clothes that Oushou wore. He didn’t have to look up to know that his friend was embarrassed about his nakedness since he, himself, felt flushed. Guiding Oushou to the bath, running the water to the perfect temperature, testing it with his hands before urging his friend into the water. The sound of the rushing water nearly drowned out the sound of relief, dropping to his knees before rolling up his sleeves in determination. Slowly lathering up the soap, washing away the sweat and grime of the fever, it was the weak grasp of a hand on his arm that had him stopping, looking at Oushou as the male struggled talk.

“You’ve should have been a nurse,” the mumbled words as eyelids started droop, the flush to dark to cheeks seemed to darken, “instead of a translator.” Only able to smile at Oushou’s confession of “nursing him back the health” helping his friend out of the water once he was rinsed off. Gently toweling off the body, adverting his eyes at the twitching flesh. With the order to Oushou to stay where he was, quickly heading to his room for some clean clothes that would be a little big on his friend, but would have to do. Returning to Oushou and helping him first into the pants and then the shirt before drying off dark hair completely. Grabbing the towel that had been set to the side, slowly drying dark hair before leading the clean, but fevered, male to his room with the bed turned down. As soon as Oushou laid down, pulling up the blankets with the lingering thought tha he’d have to ash them, lest he got sick.

Turning away to leave Oushou to sleep, the shockingly tight grip on his, reminding him of a time long ago, stopped him.

“W-why are you doing this?” The question startled him, but he only smiled to show that the question hadn’t bothered him. Turning to the bed and sitting on the edge, closing his eyes and breathing deeply before opening them.

“Because you’re my friend. My best friend,” his voice choked, disgusted with himself of how he treated his best friend in the past, “I would do anything to help you get better.”

“Anything?”

He nodded, standing and heading towards the door, a look over his shoulder while his posture was relaxed. ”Yes. Despite what Madarame thinks or tells you, you’ve been my friend for so long. I would do anything to help you Oushou. Now, just sleep as long as you need.” Closing his bedroom door softly, telling himself that he only imagined hearing the groan from his long time friend. He meant what he told Oushou, knowing that if Yonekuni heard what he told his friend, he would have a fit, despite himself playing with girls, only showing up when he wanted something or needed his attention. ’Or,’ he though bitterly to himself, ‘when he thought someone was getting to close to him.’

Footsteps quiet, even though he was sure Oushou was asleep, heading to the small kitchen. A chilled bottle of wine he bought for Yonekuni’s birthday, having bought the bottle before making dinner for the one he loved, sitting alone while it grew cold. A memory that he didn’t want to remember, along with many other disappointments that seemed to happen to him when it came to Yonekuni.

With the sound of a tight pop, the bottle of wine that had been sitting in his refrigerator for a year was now open. A wine glass that his mother had insisted he had, saying that even though he lived alone, he should have at lease one good wine glass, pouring a small amount before setting the bottle aside. A toast to everything that seemed to disappoint, to a life he thought he’d have and a love that was just as well forgotten before taking his seat at the window once more. A sip of the fruity liquid, pulling up a set of his notes as he set about to study once more. The background of thunder rumbling seemed to be the perfect mood get lost in his work.

Just as he brought up the glass for another sip, a knock on the front door had him spilling a little, cursing under his breath as he rushed to clean up the mess as not ruin his notes. A glance down at the shirt he wore, a few spots and a hint, a whiff of what he had been drinking. Sighing under his breath, he set the wine glass aside, along with the notes that, thankfully, hadn’t gotten wet and his books, pushing himself up again. Shaking his head, wondering who of the two left could be at the door. Unlocking the door, revealing the last person he thought would show up on his doorstep. Ragged and soaked, the blond that he had been waiting for, the very one that left his emotions in a tangle. A mumble of his name as arms pulled him close. Keeping his emotions in check, knowing not to get his hopes up while Yonekuni attempted to get close. After all, he was used to such things.

Keeping his tongue in check at the lingering scent on Yonekuni’s clothes, a different perfume than usual. Catching a look at the skin of the blond’s neck, he knew what happened. Again. ”You got caught again, didn’t you Yonekuni?” He asked quietly as the heavyweight drew back from him, rather quickly. The sigh of resignation, watching the guilty look the blond wore say everything he needed to know. Reaching up to cup the reddened cheek that carried the a small scratch. Biting back another sigh, leading the heavyweight to the bathroom More mumbling as the blond breathed in, the sound of a low growl before biting his lip in pain when fingers encircled his wrist, tightening to the point that it would do more than just bruise his skin if the blond tried.

“Why,” a rasp of a voice that deepened rapidly. In the blink of an eye, the back of his head was slammed violently into the wall when Yonekuni pinned him. Blue eyes narrowed while the powerful flare of the blond’s soul had him wanting to bite his lower lip in agitation. To show the male his submission. He didn’t though, keeping his back straight and head held high, despite the pain in the back of his head throbbed with every beat of his heart. Head held high, he didn’t have anything to hide from the one who pinned him.

“Why,” the blond repeated him, his voice at a near growl, “do you and this whole place reek of snake?” The sound of a deep breath in, the flare even stronger as the male leaned him. ”Like you’re friend, are you fucking him?”

“N-no!” His heart constricted and tightened at the words. ”I have never, never slept with anyone but you, Madarame.” The flinch at the use of the blond’s family, knowing that the male liked to be called by his given name but at that moment, he wasn’t going to give into the demands of the one he loved. Not after everything.

“I have been patiently waiting for you, Madarame. Biting my tongue when I see you with a girl, knowing that you-you’re,” he looked away, feeling the tears starting to build, “I’m taking care of a sick friend-” He cut himself off, turning his gaze back to angry blue eyes. ”You’re accusing me of sleeping with Oushou while doing the exact same thing with any girl who shows any type of interest. The only reason you show up anymore is either when you get caught or when you think someone is getting too close to me.” Breathing deeply, the ache in his chest threatened to overwhelm him.

“Do you actually want me, Madarame? Or am I just a convenient heat source to be used when you feel like it?” Brushing away the few tears that slipped free as he tried to calm himself. ”You haven’t touched me since school.”

“I’m not sure-”

He held up his hand, stopping the words that he knew by heart, having heard it so many times before. ”Yes, you’re not sure. But what about me? I made the promise to wait for you, Madarame. But I can’t wait forever. And I shouldn’t. The love I have for you will always be there, but if you can’t give me what I want and need,” he placed a hand on his chest, as if silently telling the blond, “I haven’t had sex since that one night we shared. The last time you actually touched me with desire, instead of disgust.” A hallow chuckle as he pulled away from Yonekuni and made his way into the living room, sitting on the couch with a heavy sigh.

“Oushou’s sick and he’s staying here.” A hard glare at the immediate protest, shutting Yonekuni up before he could say a word. ”If you can control your jealousy, you can stay, Madarame.” The movement as the male followed him, a dip in the couch and a blond head on his shoulder.

“What did you mean “If you can’t give me what I want and need”?”

The question murmured close to his ear, he tried his best to ignore the faint scent of perfume, reaching up to brush away the bangs that covered blue eyes.

“Just think about it, Madarame. I want to be loved and held, to be treated as a lover should be treated.” He let his words drift off, wanting the blond to understand the underlining meaning of them. He shouldn’t have to explain to him, hoping that he would understand and finally make a move to further what relationship they had.

Neither saw the weak body that leaned heavily against the wall for support, hand reaching out as if trying to stop the two. With his head throbbing, he knew he should have stayed in bed, wrapped up in Shirou’s scent, but with the raised voices, he couldn’t ignore the sound of Shirou’s pained voice. The accusation from Madarame of Shirou sleeping and fucking him, despite his wildest dreams, it wasn’t true.

He could only watch quietly, keeping hidden as Madarame asked and the quiet answer. If he was up to it, he would have smirked at what he heard and instead, filed away the information later. Slowly making his way back to the bed he left, wanting nothing more than to bury hiss head in the pillows that were covered in Shirou’s scent. His fevered mind planned and plotted, if anything, he was patient. Madarame was bound to screw up, giving him. Pushing away his own problems with his mother and setting him up with arranged marriages, he would hold Shirou to what he told him.

Setting his aching body back into the bed with a low groan, wanting nothing more than the comforting touch Shirou had, the warmth and welcoming. Closing his eyes and letting sleep claim him, falling into his dreams of being one with the one he loved. It would be later that he thought he heard the door slowly open, the feel of a hand on his forehead and the whisper of his name, it took everything he had to convince himself that he hadn’t imagined. Whispered words that he wanted to be real, the heart break he heard in Shirou’s voice and if if he wasn’t so weak, he would have reached out to comfort him. Why didn’t Shirou pick him? He wouldn’t treat the one he loved the way Madarame treated Shirou.

He never knew that his first and only chance would come a year later, a dream that he never admitted to anyone but the person it was about. The arrangement his family was forcing down on him, to go through continuing the family line. He had no choice, with his brother running off with the one he loved, one that his mother despised, siring twins. And though he loved his niece and nephew, the frustration he was feeling bubbled to the point that he pushed himself away from the table in the middle of dinner and took off. Hands shoved in his pockets, he walked the streets, knowing by heart where he was going. Pausing at a corner convenience store before heading to the one place he was accepted and welcomed. A bag hanging from his left hand, the contents of what he bought, knocking on the door with his right, easily catching the sounds of two voices. The sound of footsteps and the click of the lock before the door swung open.

Familiar blond hair that belonged to Madarame’s younger brother. He could easily pick up on the irritation in the cat’s blue eyes before pale eyes flicked to the back he held. ”Feeling down, too?” A question he didn’t have to answer since the nekomata knew the answer. Stepping inside when Hidekuni stepped aside, toeing off his shoes and joining Shirou in the living room. The forced smile and red rimmed eyes, Shirou didn’t have to say anything, he could only guess what happened. Taking a seat on the floor, his knee brushing against Shirou’s. He didn’t miss the look the blond shot him, the denial that Hidekuni gave him when he confronted him a long time ago was now useless. The blond had been drawn to the pheromones that his friend was giving off. He didn’t tell Shirou that he now knew his secret, stumbling upon it one day when he dropped by to return the key he borrowed.

The apartment had been silent, toeing off his shoes at the doorway as he called out for Shirou, waiting for for a response. Silence seemed to be his only answer as he stepped further into the apartment. Silence, except for the very faint gasps that caught his attention as he made his way further into the living room and into the hallway. Following the sounds to Shirou’s bedroom, the door cracked open just barely halfway, the sight of the body on the bed had him swallowing back a groan that wanted to rise at what he saw.

Long legs parted and bend, hands cupping and stroking the length that seemed to beckon him before one slid away. A pink tongue licking at fingers, sucking them in to coat them in saliva, imagining something else that tongue could lick and suck, barely catching as the fingers slide away and down. Past the hand that held the throbbing cock and taunt balls, down to the small, puckered hole. His grip on the door jam tightened as he watched Shirou pleasure himself. Wanting nothing more than to push himself away from where he stood and over towards the bed. To climb up and kneel before Shirou’s parted legs, spread them wider to get a better view of the hard flesh, slip his fingers in to join Shirou’s.

A sound of disappointment had pulled him from his thoughts, watching quietly as the male’s hand released himself and reached over to the other side of the bed, his eyes widening at the sight of the toy being pulled out. They widened even further at the shimmer around Shirou’s body, the ears that popped up, dark hair lightening to almost white and the swish of a tail. His hand crept down, palming at the bulge in his pangs when the toy was rubbed against the mall hole, hips tilted even more, as if to give him a better view. The low hiss of pleasure as the toy sunk inside, unable to tear his eyes away.

He didn’t care if he was caught, his hand slipping the button free and lowering his zipper to slip his hand inside. The toss of a pale hair, sounds of pleasure that had him fighting with himself. Not to just do what his instincts told him to do. The arch of Shirou’s back, a wordless cry as his friend came.

The shake of his shoulder, pulling himself from his thoughts, flushing slightly and shifting his body with the hopes that the two wouldn’t notice his arousal. The little smile that Shirou tried to pass off and the knowing smirk that Hidekuni sent him.

“What’s got you drinking away your sorrows, Oushou?” Shirou asked, speaking up for the first time since he showed up. The sinking feeling in his stomach returned, reminding him of the arrangement his mother set up for hi, his path chosen and unable to be with the one he loved.

“Omiai,” he sighed as he toked the offered can from Shirou and popped the tab before taking a long drink, nodding. Watching the blond turn towards Shirou and mutter before the hidden madararui spoke almost fluently in English. His heart plummeted at the easy way Shirou and Hidekuni interacted. Even if Shirou couldn’t see the interest Hidekuni had for him, he could.

“It’s scheduled for next week and I can’t get out of it,” head down, speaking quietly, “Shirou, do you remember me telling Madarame that I love you?” Out of the corner of his eye, seeing Hidekuni’s head jerk up, eyes widening and he wondered if the heavyweight could guess what he was about to say. The faint blush to Shirou’s cheeks, fingers tightening on the can he held.

“Y-yes, I remember,” Shirou’s words were soft, “that was the first and only time someone told me that they loved me.”

The slight tremble of his voice and hands, lowering of the dark head. Setting aside the can of beer, he leaned forward and reached out, lifting the down turned head up.

“Don’t cry,” he pleaded as he gathered up his courage to say what had been plaguing him for so long, “please.” Tilting his head, brushing his lips across parted lips, only briefly and pulled back.

“I know your heart belongs to another, but I want,” he shook his head, as if to clear his thoughts, “no, I need to ask you this. Please sleep with me, if only once.” The silence was the hardest to endure, chancing a look at Shirou at first. Eyes wide in surprise and the flush he wore from darkened before looking at the younger male. Hands, strong enough to snap bone, clenched against legs. He knew Hidekuni wanted to speak out, object against his plea and mark Shirou as his own.

“Just, just think about it, okay Shirou? I know you don’t feel the same way that I do about you, but I want a taste of something I know I can never have.”

“I-uh, o-okay.”

The whisper had him digging his fingernails against the palms of his hands as he held his emotions in check. The pounding in his chest ached, nearly doubling over, although he forced himself to remain calm. ”Okay? Okay that you’ll think about it? Or “Okay you’ll sleep with him”?” Hidekuni found himself asking, refusing to look at Oushou and instead, stared at Shirou, watching the male shift in his seat.

“Why sleep with him when you could sleep with me?”

The minute the words left his lips, he wished he could recall them. The widening of gray eyes and the flush that darkened Shirou’s cheeks, a wave of pheromones slammed into him as well as Oushou, dark eyes narrowed at him.

“Girlfriend.” The words blurted out of Shirou’s mouth quickly, startling the both of them before he continued. ”I mean, you have a girlfriend, Hidekuni-kun,” Shirou stated softly, “why would you want to sleep with me?” The question hung in the air, two of the three shifted nervously before Shirou pushed himself up, leaving him and Oushou alone in the room. Hair bristling as the snake glared at him, a brief flare of the male’s soul in a threatening way, the furious whisper of “What the hell are you doing?”

“This is my only chance to lay with him and you have to butt in with “Why don’t you sleep with me? You don’t even care for Shirou in that way!” Teeth gritting as the fingers that had started to relax from clenching tightly started to dig into his palms once more.

“How would you know how I feel about him? You’re not the only one who hides their feelings! You’re not the only one who comforts and wants him to be happy!” Finding himself wanting to snarl and snap his teeth at the snake, the desire to let his soul out and fight for the male on the edge of his mind. Did he want to risk his heart after being rejected by his first love? He had a girlfriend, who was nothing more than a convenient excuse that, using her so he wouldn’t have to admit what was deep down and risk his heart again. And now, he was faced with the thought of losing his friendship with Shirou over emotions he wasn’t even sure of. The thought alone of the heavyweight laying with Oushou, being embraced by him and fucked. He shook his head and drank what was left in the can, rying to drown out the images his mind provided him.

“If you feel something for Shirou, be honest with yourself. He’s been waiting by Madarame’s side so long that he hasn’t been touched by no one but his own.” The satisfying smile, one that hinged with sadness. ”I’ll have only one chance to be with him. But you, you’ll be able to make him smile again, the way he should be smiling.” Oushou paused, he couldn’t help but wonder how the male knew of Shirou not being touched or pleasured by anyone but himself. The smile that the snake wore, though, seemed to tell that he knew more than he was letting on.

Silence seemed to settle between them comfortably, finishing their drinks from their respective cans when Shirou returned, taking his spot between the two. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught the interested look the wolf shot him.

His brother was a fool to throw Shirou to the side for girls that only cared about linage and not for the one who loved him. The last time Yonekuni had come by, the distance between the two was more than noticeable and though he was an outsider, he could see the canine pull away from the reptile. The fit Yonekuni pulled when he found out that he moved into the spare room of the apartment months ago, when his parents finished their business and were getting ready to move on to, Shirou had offered him to stay. But then, he caught the sorrowful look his brother had given Shirou. He knew Yonekuni was still struggling with his feelings and deep down, he felt Shirou start pull away from him. The smell of food pulled him from his thoughts, the lingering the scent that the wolf had given off earlier.

“So, you’re going to think about what I said?” Oushou asked after swallowing what he waas chewing. The pregnant pause and the squirming before Shirou nodded.

“Yes, I’m going to think about it,” the flushed look sent his heart racing and he hoped his body wouldn’t show how excited it was, “even though I told Madarame I’d wait, I want to be touched like a lover should be touched.” The embarrassment that Shirou was feeling at admitting of not having sex, a glance to Oushou. The restraint the snake was putting himself through, as if he was forcing himself not to grab and pull SHirou into his room and show the male just how much he was wanted.

The awkwardness that had settled earlier after Oushou’s question disappeared as the night progressed. The laughs and confessions of embarrassment, eating and drinking before one by one, they fell asleep.

He didn’t know what time it was when he awoke or what it was that woke him. The faint light coming from the window gave him enough to see the body he was resting against. Head pillowed on Shirou’s hip while a hand seemed to be curled around his neck possessively, the faint stroking of a thumb that soothed. Swallowing hard, breathing deeply to catch the wolf’s natural scent that called to the animal inside. Glancing up, the shadows on parted lips. Gaze flickering to the snake off to the side before back up, watching a pink tongue peek out to lick at a bottom lip before movement. The wolf shifted to his side, moving towards him and leaving his head nuzzled into the front of Shirou’s pants. Feeling a twitch under his nose, a low moan from Shirou, another scent and his hand itched to reach up, to touch and find out what Shirou wanted. To feel smooth skin under his hand.

A mumble of a name, straining to hear and understand before pushing himself away, up to his his feet to make his way to the bathroom. Stretching his body, he reached the bathroom, hand on the doorknob, it was the sound of “Hidekuni-kun” that had him freezing in his steps. A look over his shoulder, teeth biting down on a lower lip. ”I’m sorry about scaring you off.” He cocked his head, gaze tracing the outline of Shirou’s lips.

“What do you mean?” He could only ask, trying to keep his attention from slipping down the male’s body to the flesh that he knew was straining at Shirou’s pants. Dropping his hand from the doorknob, letting his hand hang at his side while Shirou looked at his face, searching his eyes before continuing.

“For, uh, saying your name while I dreamt,” he heavy flush and he could only imagine ears laying back in submission, a tale tucked between legs. ”I didn’t know you could hear-” He didn’t wait for the male to finish, the hand that he left dangling snapped out to pull the wolf to him before spinning them around to pin Shirou to the wall. He moved in closer, catching more of the scent the canine gave off.

“I don’t know when my feelings started to change,” he murmured, ducking his head to the bare neck before him, “I like you, I really do. The thought of Oushou wanted to be with you. Taking you, even if it’s just one time, sets something off in me.” Breathing in heaven like scent, letting it wash over his senses.

“Come with me,” he decided as he pulled back to look down into gray eyes. ”This summer, come with me to England. Get away from here for a while.” Ducking his head to keep Shirou from biting down on his lower lip, the shudder than ran through the heavyweight’s body was more than enough to get him hard. ”I can’t stop you from wanting to help Oushou. But don’t let my brother stop you from denying yourself happiness.” A quick lick at Shirou’s bottom lip, unable to stop the guttural sound that formed in his chest at the feel of a hesitant touch of a tongue against his. ”Come with me to England this summer, after your birthday. Let me show you other places where you could enjoy life.” He didn’t care if he sounded like he was pleading, not wanting to lose this chance at happiness.

“Can-can I think about it?” He nodded his head at the question, the excitement at the thought of the canine saying yes. ”I’ll let you know, Hidekuni-kun.” The shy smile, watching the disheveled male walk back into the living room. Walking quietly to his room, closing the door and leaning against it. He knew he had a ridiculous smile on his face, unable to stop his hands from fumbling with the button and zipper of his pants. Closing his eyes as he slipped his hands inside to curl around his hard cock, hissing when his thumb swiped away the fluid that started to bead. He didn’t hear the sound on the other side of the door as he groaned out Shirou’s name.

~

He shuddered despite the warmth the club provided. Taking the drink one of his customers handed to him, waiting for him to drink. ”Yonekuni-kun, are you okay? You went pale for a moment.” A girl with short blond hair asked, he struggled to remember her name for a moment and took a sip of the expensive champagne that she poured for both him and herself.

“I’m fine.” He gave her his winning smile before taking another sip of the liquid. It wouldn’t do for him to get drunk when it was him that had to get his customers to buy more and spend their money at the club. ”I had a strange feeling.” He tried to wave off their concern, but the girls wouldn’t drop the subject.

“Maybe it’s a premonition, Yonekuni-kun” the curly haired girl to his left offer as she scooted closer, letting the strap of her dress slip a little, maybe in the hopes he would be interested in what she had to offer, luring him in for a night together and more. A tactic that he was used to and had quickly become bored of, seeing the girls as those after to attach themselves to a heavyweight. If anything, she was worth only a quick fuck and nothing more, barely any heat to offer him.

He knew he shouldn’t be there, shouldn’t be surrounding himself with these opportunists. Should be home with the one who loved him, to be held and touched just right. But he didn’t have a home with Shirou. He had an empty apartment that sometimes was home to a girl he saw more than once. The feelings he had for the heavyweight canine were complex, confusing and twisting all at the same time. Maybe he could plan an outing, just the two of them. Maybe a movie or if Shirou didn’t want to go out, they could stay in and enjoy the evening alone. After kicking Hidekuni out of the apartment of course. It still irked him to know that his younger brother was rooming with his boyfriend, he couldn’t believe Shirou even offered Hidekuni room to stay. It should be him sharing that apartment with the wolf. But if he was sharing with Shirou, he wouldn’t be able to bring home any of the girls that he frequented.

Holding back the wince of Shirou walking in on him with a girl, he was still somewhat uncomfortable with referring Shirou as his boyfriend, when he hadn’t even touched the male in years. He used to wonder why the wolf never stopped by to see him, but would remember the first and only time the male did stop by to see him at work. Pulling the wolf into the semi dark corner, the worry he felt wasn’t for Shirou, but for the fact that if anyone sow him, they would put two and two together. They’d figure out that he was the male’s partner. Wouldn’t they speculate that he was gay? The harsh words he spoke to Shirou, watching the hope and light slowly die in the heavyweight’s gray eyes. The faint words of “You’re ashamed of me” as Shirou pulled away, saying “I won’t bother you again, Madarame.”

And he never did. The phone calls he used to look forward to stopped and the awkwardness returned, watching the male drift away. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of Shirou, it was the fact that he was concerned about his reputation for being a gentleman to the girls and woman who frequented the club and as a result, made him the top requested host of the club. He couldn’t let on that his partner was male.

The sound of his name being called by his manager, pulling him from his thoughts. Giving the girls an apologetic smile, he excused himself and their words of “hurry back” lingered in the air. He followed the manager though the room, around the tables and into the back hall that lead to the manager’s office.

“let me get straight to the point, Madarame-kun,” he took the seat that was offered to him, the manager sitting across the desk from him, “let me state that once again, you’re the top requested host here.” He smiled to himself at that, maybe the premonition he had earlier was nothing but a chill. ”Another thing, though, it’s not exactly a rule to sleep with the customers, it’s not a good thing to mix business and pleasure. You see, we’ve got a problem here on our hands, Madarame-kun. And it all revolves around you.”

The sound of the door opening, a young woman stepped in. The every one he had slept with several times over the course of the previous month.

~

It had been a week since the small drinking party that he and his two friends had, leaving all three of them confused and drunk. The shocking question that had both surprised and aroused him, not only did Oushou have the courage to ask. To bare his want out in open for him and Hidekuni to see, but to reach and kiss him. Comfort him in ways that just being a mere friend couldn’t do. But the kiss that Hidekuni gave him, his hands trembled at the memory of the blond’s lips on his. The burning touch to his skin and the groan Hidekuni gave from the other side of the door. The sheepish look Oushou gave him the following morning, despite the hangover they all had.

Waiting after class on the last day of the week, graduation was rapidly approaching as well birthday, everything seemed to be rushed. Taking his time packing up his things, knowing that Oushou’s class would be out later than his, he made sure his notes were in proper order, slipping them into his bag. The hand on his shoulder and the friendly smile that his professor gave him.

“You’re doing quiet well in my class, Fujiwara-kun,” the older male chuckled, “in fact, you’re in the top ten percentage of all my classes. Have you thought about working overseas after school?” He shook his head, he hadn’t thought about it. Never entered his mind at all. ”Here, let me give you a number for a company that’s been interest in recruiting Japanese translators. I think they’d be perfect for you.” A business card was handed to him, which he took with a soft thank you. ”Just give them my name and they’ll call me to confirm.”

He thanked him once again, shouldering his bag he set off towards Oushou’s class on the other side of campus. He couldn’t help the feel of nervousness running through him with what he was going to say, what he was going to say to Oushou. He had thought about Oushou’s question, thought about it every day, going over again and again in his mind, coming to a decision that would hopefully continue their friendship. Pulling out his phone, he glanced at the time before shoving the phone back into his pocket as the doors to Oushou’s classroom opened, the lecture finished for the week. He didn’t love his friend the way Oushou loved him, he wanted to be touched and offer the pleasure that the male obviously wanted. To show him that even though he didn’t love him romantically, he loved him as a friend. Catching the sight of his bestfriend, weaving his way through the people to join his friend.

“Oushou,” a touch to the tanned arm, “want to have lunch?” With his hands shoved in his pockets, his friend wouldn’t see how nervous he was, didn’t want to give off any hint of what he was going to say. Walking quietly away from the campus, a few blocks away to a small restaurant that they liked to favor when they had lunch. The cool wash of air as they stepped inside, following the waitress to a small, secluded talbe in the corner. Taking the menu’s that were offered along with giving her their drink order before turning to Oushou.

“Do you remember what you asked me last week?” The male across from him straightened, cheeks coloring and the mumble of “I thought you forgot. A shake of his head and a smile. ”No, I didn’t forget. I thought about it and if you’re still interested-”

“Y-yeah! I’m still! Interested, I mean,” dark eyes widened, “does this mean you’re saying yes?” Shirou nodded, flushed as he thought of being taken. ”Do you have any more classes after this?” The rapid shake of a dark head, watching Oushou duck his head. ”I was afraid that you’d think of my question, request, as just a drunken ramble.” The fidgeting in his seat as his body started to react, biting his lip to stop the sound when Oushou reached across the table to take his hand, rubbing his thumb gently across his skin. Only pulling back when the waitress returned to take their order, flushing under the gaze Oushou gave him.

The friendly banter that they always enjoyed had never left, eating slowly as Oushou talked about the interviews he had for when he graduated. The talk turned downward when the topic of the omiai that the male had to attend a few days before. By the time that they finished, meeting Oushou outside once he payed, he turned to his friend. ”So, um, you’ll be by soon, right?” Shirou asked, shouldering his bag and watched Oushou do the same. The sound of agreement, frowning a little when Oushou kept his gaze away from, though he caught the hint of color on the male’s cheeks that quickly darkened the more he stared.

Quietly heading down the street, slowly walking home all the while knowing he would have the apartment to himself, with Hidekuni visiting his parents, who were in town for the day. The nagging feeling of guilt ate at him for what he planned to do, no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t push the feeling away. Lost deep in his thoughts,, he didn’t hear the call of his name as he neared home. The feeling of a hand on his shoulder, pulling him from his thoughts of his lack of a love life.

“You didn’t hear me calling you?” The familiar drawl of a deep voice, from the one person he hadn’t seen in three weeks.

“No, I didn’t Madarame.” He could hear and feel the call to his soul and while he would usually answer right away, he could tell something was off. If he was younger, he would have tried his hardest to cover up the silence between them. But now, standing there and watching the blond shove his hands in his pockets, he was more content to wait for Yonekuni to speak.

“I was wondering, since it’s a day off tonight, if you’d like to see a movie.” For a moment, he forgot all about what Yonekuni had been doing with the girls that flocked to him. Reminding him of how things used to be between them when they first started going out. He sighed and folded his arms across his chest. ”I thought you didn’t want to be seen with me in public, Madarame.” He gave the blond a small smile, as if to take away the sting in his words. ”As much as I want to, Madarame, I’ve got a prior engagement that I can’t break.”

“Then we can want a movie alone at your place.”

He bit his tongue, trying to keep his expression neutral all the while trying to think of how to persuade Yonekuni to leave without giving away what he had planned. ”Why are you doing this now? It’s-I mean, why now? You haven’t asked me out since we slept together in school. You usually don’t want to be seen with me.”

The fierce grab to his shoulders, the pain of being pushed up against the wall and lips covering his in a quick and forceful kiss. The once familiar feeling of want was there, the quickening of his heart and the spike of arousal. But it lacked the passion and love, the want and the fact that the lingering scent of another, perfume of the woman Yonekuni must have slept with earlier. Pushing at Yonekuni’s shoulders, ignoring the sound as the blond pulled back. It was nothing like the kiss Hidekuni gave him.

“Just because I say something like doesn’t make it true. It’s been so long since we were together, lets spend tonight alone.” Yonekuni offered, stepping back away from, allowing him to slip away from where he was pinned.

“You’re lying, Madarame. There’s something wrong and now you’re trying to escape with me.” A humorless chuckle that belied the pain he felt. ”You honestly don’t want me.” He sighed to himself, knowing full well that it would do him no good to even try to get his hopes up. ”You need to figure out your problems before coming to me.” Brushing past the still blond, a brief touch to Yonekuni’s shoulder. ”When you’ve dealt with your problem and ready to face me, then we’ll talk. As of right now, were nothing more then friends. Not lovers as I thought and hoped to be.” Turning to walk away, he thought he heard “Are you still waiting for me?” And though he was sure Yonekuni spoke those words, he didn’t bother answering.

By the time he made it back to his apartment, the guilt was back, eating at him. The voice in the back of his mind nagged at him for not staying by Yonekuni’s side. Didn’t he deserve happiness too? Wasn’t he allowed to have fun and be touched? Or was he expected to stay by Yonekuni’s side and wait patiently for even a speck of attention? All the while Yonekuni slept with anyone he wanted? He shook his head, pouring himself a small glass of champagne before going to each window to close the blinds, not wanting anyone seeing what he was about to do. He wasn’t a fool, knowing that Yonekuni had expected him to wait patiently for him, no matter how long.

He did warn the blond that he couldn’t wait forever and while four years had passed, the feeling of being ignored overtook his love for the blond. And the words that Oushou spoke, the confession Hidekuni gave. The feeling of being wanted and loved made it an easier decision to answer Oushou’s question.

He couldn’t help the nervous feeling growing in the pit of his stomach. Body aching, longing for a touch from someone who wanted him. Setting aside the glass he held, stepping into his bedroom and pulled out the new bottle of lubrication he bought just a few days ago. A different brand that he normally bought for himself. Coloring a little, heading towards the bathroom all the while slowly unbuttoning his shirt, shrugging the clothing off and letting it fall to the floor. Hands automatically to the waistband of his pants, slipping the button free before slowly lowering the tab of the zipper down. Rubbing his hand along his hip as he pushed down his pants, he couldn’t help but wonder how Oushou’s hand would feel like on his skin.

He couldn’t help the shiver of excitement as he stepped out of the clothing pooled at his feet, pushing down the last piece of clothing before reaching to turn on the shower. The trickle of water, followed by the sound of rushing as the water pressure built up, hissing at the hot temperature before turning on the cold water just enough to make it more tolerable. Washing away at his body, by passing his twitching flesh, not wanting to finish before things even started. He would be lying if he said he hadn’t imagined what Oushou would do to him. He never told his friend that he knew he was being spied upon last year, the teasing of the toy against his small hole, he could smell th scent Oushou gave off and the faint moan turned him on as he pushed the small vibrator inside.

Flushing under the rushing water, pushing away all thoughts in attempts to calm his body down, ducking his head under the spray of water and rinsed off the soap. Shutting off the water, reaching for the towel he had placed there earlier, he slowly dried off his body, rubbing against his stiff cock. A sound that he muffled by biting his lower lip, stopping his hand from reaching down. Forcing himself not to give in and get off before Oushou arrived. Wrapping the towel around his waist, gathering his discarded clothes that he left on the ground before heading to his bedroom, pausing at the closed door that lead to Hidekuni’s bedroom. He remembered the offer the jaguar gave him, the pain he could easily see in his blue eyes that he couldn’t stop him from helping Oushou. The thump in his chest, remembering the feel of lips on his, the flutter in his stomach. A feeling he hadn’t experienced in so long. Something he wanted to feel again.

The quick knock on the door, his thoughts of the younger blond pushed away while he swallowed down the lump in his throat. He couldn’t think about Hidekuni while with Oushou, it would ruin everything if he ended up slipping someone else’s name while his friend pleasured him. ’Shouldn’t be nervous,’ he told himself as he walked towards the door, looking through the small peephole before unlocking and opening the door. Stepping back so that if there were others passing by in the hallway, they wouldn’t see how little he was wearing. Briefly looking at the small bag that Oushou carried, no doubt a change of clothes before looking into dark eyes that seemed aflame with want.

“O-Oushou.” He hadn’t meant for his friend’s name to come out as a breathy whisper, though that didn’t stop him from reaching for his friend’s hand to lead the male into his bedroom. The mumble before a clearing of a throat.

“Shirou,” a genuine smile as he was pulled close, a brush of lips against his, ”can we?” A jerk of a dark head towards the hallway, a slight nod of his head before he was being pulled, almost dragged towards his room. The minute the bedroom closed, Oushou dropped his bag on the floor, forgotten as hands reached out to cradle the back of his head. ”I’ve dreamt about about this for so long.” His reply was stolen, a kiss that started off gentle, a nip to his lower lip and the soothing swipe of a tongue, as if he was trying to apologize for the brief pain. A hand on his bare chest, slowly moving as if Oushou was trying to map out his skin and muscles, memorizing them and storing them away.

Pulling away from the kiss, trailing his lips across a tanned and flush cheek and down the side of his neck. Teeth nipped gently, playfully along the strong cords of muscle, pausing to move and suck along the bobbing adam’s apple as his lover swallowed. A soothing kiss, the tip of his tongue tracing the mark, taking away the sting while sliding his hands up Oushou’s side, rubbing his chest through the cloth of his shirt. Hand moving down, slipping under the shirt, touching warm and smooth skin. Fingertips making their way up to find and tease flat nipples into hardness, flicking the tip of his thumb back and forth across the rapidly hardening nubs.

“Pull it off.” He ordered softly, he didn’t have to tell Oushou what he meant, knowing that the male knew exactly what he meant. Watching Oushou scramble at his shirt, hands grasping the edge of the clothing and pulled it over his head, tossing it to the side where the rest of his clothing will lay when they’re done. ”Perfect,” he whispered to himself, leaning in to nuzzle the tanned chest. Dropping kisses and licks as he ducked his head, trailing the tip of his tongue around the edge of the light brown nipple, closing his lips around the hard nub of flesh. Soft sucks, flicking his tongue along the nub, nipping while the palms of his hand slid around, first up and then down, rubbing against tensed muscles. Switching to the neglected nipple, hands slipping back between them, palming the strained cloth of Oushou’s pants, feeling the hard flesh twitch under his hand. Murmuring nonsense, a sharp nip when fingers slid through his hair, tightening around dark strands. ”What,” one last flick of his tongue, lips sliding away, “do you want, Oushou?”

Taking the male’s lips in a quick kiss, the sudden feel of being jerked back. ”I’ve always wondered how it would feel if your mouth was on me,” he groaned, imagining, “Sucking me off. Wondering if your mouth is as hot as your hands or would it be hotter?”

Watching Oushou move until the back of his legs hit the edge of the bed, sitting down and spreading his knees all the while rubbing at at his flesh that lay hidden in the pants he wore. Licking his lips, moving and kneeling in between parted legs, he nuzzled at the strained cloth, catching the muted scent, wondering if Oushou’s scent would be stronger once the clothing was removed. Hands slowly unbuttoned and lowered the zipper. His heart raced at the sight of stretched, white cloth, the last barrier that blocked him from his goal. It had been so long since he had seen another male’s flesh, it didn’t count when he’d see and touch his own.

Hands moving, swatting away Oushou’s hands in favor of pulling the clothing down to bare the flared and bulbous head. Dark and swollen, the small slit leaking copious amount of pre-cum. A slow lick, swiping away the clear fluid while pulling the clothing further down, giving him more access. Tracing the edge of the sensitive head with the tip of his tongue, following the veins down the side and back up. Closing his eyes, taking the head of Oushou’s cock in his mouth, weighing the flesh against his tongue while the pleasured groan rumbled out of his lover’s chest. Breathing deeply through his nose, picking up a rhythm that started off slow and hesitant, almost unsure before fingers, gentle in nature, ran through his hair. Encouraged by words and hisses, sounds that he seemed to understand as he chanced a look up, glazed eyes staring down at him.

The movement of his bobbing slowed while his hand joined in, sliding inside to find and gently caress the taunt and heavy balls. Working them softly in his hand, he pulled his head up, letting the slick flesh slip free from his mouth. Hands slide away from his hair, down and cupped his cheek, thumb rubbing along his bottom lip. A lick at the thumb, his free hand pushed at the towel at his waist, letting the towel pool around him. Glancing down at his body, looking away, almost ashamed with himself for being turned on so much.

“Shirou,” his name name whispered harshly, “show me. Let me watch you touch yourself.” He knew what Oushou was thinking, knew that the male didn’t have to say “like you did before, when I watched. Peaking in on you.” One hand on his shoulder and up, turning his head towards Oushou, seeing the male’s other hand wrapped around his cock, slowly stroking. Dark eyes slitting in a way he’d seen only another person do, swallowing harshly. ”Show me how you use that toy of yours. Ben, ah-” he smiled to himself, leaning forward to lick up the beading fluid, “wanting to see more of you.” A bite to his bottom lip as his hand joined Oushou’s for only a minute, pulling away before standing and kneeling on the bed. Reaching over to the nightstand, his fingers curling around the toy he had used the other day, along with lubrication he pulled out just an hour ago.

Settling back against his pillows, licking his lips nervously as he watched Oushou stand. Hands rushing to push pants down and off before kneeling on the end of the bed, situated just right. A bite of his bottom lip, popping the cap of the lubrication open, tilting the bottle just enough to cover several of his fingers with the slick substance. Capping the bottle and setting it to the side, tilting his hips a little while reaching down past his straining flesh and his taunt balls, which he lifted just enough so Oushou could see where his fingers where headed. Fingertips seeking and finding, rubbing against his small, puckered hole. Slowly circling, dipping just the tip of one finger inside himself, a sound that resembled a whimper escaped as he pushed the finger a little deeper.

Eyes slowly closing as he worked the first finger in and out, biting his lip to stifle his groans as he worked a second finger in, the trembling of his legs as his finger slipped deeper. The hot touch of a hand on his skin, fingers joining his. Eyes snapping open, mouth opening to speak only to have his lips stolen in a slow and building kiss, sucking on the corner of his lover’s mouth.

“Grab the toy,” a slow lick, “and the bottle.” Through hazy eyes, he watched Oushou do what he ordered, grabbing the toy and the lubrication. Pulling his finger’s free, along with Oushou’s, taking the toy that his lover held up for him. Deft fingers flicked open the bottle once more, getting ready to tilt and pour the slick liquid on his hands, the vibrator was grabbed from his hand and tossed to the side.

“Let’s do that later, Shirou,” arms wrapped around him and he found himself on Oushou’s chest as the male pulled him close, “I want to go slow right now. Savor you.” A shudder ran through him as Oushou’s mouth moved slowly down the side of his neck, teeth sinking in with a hard suck. Hands sliding down his back, cupping his ass and urging him to move, almost rutting against him while Oushou’s mouth seemed to latch on to any part he could reach. The feel of hard flesh poking against the curve of his ass, smiling down at Oushou while he rocked against the one below him. Ducking his head, whispering words into the male’s ears. The low moan as hands abandoned his ass and slipped between them.

Staring up at the dropped head, gray eyes closed as his hand slowly moved along Shirou’s length, the slow movements of the male’s hips. This seemed like nothing more than a dream, the cry of his name when his thumb rubbed against the sensitive tip. Struggling to lift his upper body high enough, tongue catching the sliding droplets of sweat. Taste exploding on his tongue, surpassing what his imagination had tried to supply him when he was younger. Heat intensifying between them, dropping his hand away and forcing the male onto his back. Lifting one leg to Shirou’s chest before Shirou caught onto what he planned to do.

Baring the prize for his eyes, running the palms of his hands along the underside of Shirou’s long legs, enjoying the contrast of his tanned hands and Shirou’s pale skin. ”Do you know what else I dreamed of? Not only did I want to watch your body take in that toy, but to taste you. If,” his heart fell at what he was about to say, “if only once.” The low murmur of his name before bending down, nosing against Shirou’s exposed flesh. Overwhelming scent, more so than the male’s sweat. A tentative lick, tongue parting through the fine hairs that encircled the base of Shirou’s cock. Snuffing at warm skin, as if to force Shirou’s scent to arise more, soft nips as he neared his goal.

Gently rubbing his thumb against the lightly lubricated hole, leaning in to further catch the scent of soap and Shirou, grinning to himself at the thought of the male washing up just for him. Easily pushing in his thumb, his tongue tracing the edge of the hole, determined to do this right as he closed his eyes and memorized more of the male’s musk like scent.

~

He should still be with his parents, enjoying the evening at a nice restaurant before heading to the art gala was having. Should be conversing with his mother, slightly hinting that he found the one that made his heart race. It was the onslaught of a headache, pounding behind his eyes that had him excusing himself and putting an end to the evening for him. Bidding his parents goodbye, slowly making his way from the restaurant and towards the train, making his way back to the apartment that he shared with Shirou. Just the thought of th male made him smile, despite the throbbing in his head.

Enduring the train ride home, forcing his way through those who were getting off of work, the long walk to the apartment seemed to go on until he finally reached the building. Up the stairs, reaching for his keys before unlocking the door. The minute the door swung open, his instincts screamed at him. The sight of familiar shoes next to Shirou’s, the living room dark and everything came rushing back to him. The three of them drinking, the question and confession. Of his face nuzzling into Shirou’s lap and the words of telling the male he couldn’t stop him but oh how he wanted to.

A quick glance down the hallway, the door that led to Shirou’s bedroom was closed and most likely locked, if he were to try. Toeing off his shoes and arranging them so they sat between Shirou’s and Oushou’s shoes before stumbling into the kitchen, trying to make as little noise as possible while searching through the cupboards for the bottle of aspirin that he knew they had. Finding the medication and a bottle of water from the fridge, he passed by Shirou’s door. Passing Shirou’s door, he heard the faint sounds and entertained such thoughts of Shirou failing to please Shirou. Leaving the wolf unsatisfied. A low sound that resembled a whimper followed by a whine had him rushing to his room.

Once he closed the bedroom door, Hidekuni leaned back against the door and closed his eyes before breaking the seal on the bottle of water. A mouth full of water and drowning down several aspirins, he nearly dropped to the bed once he reached it, trying to ignore the escalating sounds, rolling onto his side with his back to the door. The silence in his room seemed to allow the sounds of the apartment to echo, low groans and harsh breathing. Closing his eyes tightly, covering his ears with his hands in a vain attempt to block out the sound of Shirou’s pleasure. Attempting to deny the truth of what was actually going on in his home. He couldn’t complain, couldn’t march into the heavyweight’s room and pull the middleweight off the male he wanted. Instead, he tried to pretend that this was nothing more than a bad dream.

He didn’t know when he fell asleep, the sound of low rumbling that could only be thunder woke him from the light slumber. The room semi dark, what light that filtered through the curtains was weak, barely enough for him to see properly. Rubbing at his eyes, wondering why he was alone in his room, his dream lingering in his mind before he remembered the night before. Of coming home and knowing that Shirou laid with Oushou. Sitting up in his bed, he could hear the sounds of footsteps coming to a stop outside his door and he only imagined Shirou standing at his door. Maybe with his hand raised, as if he was getting ready to knock or maybe a little hesitant.

The soft knock on his door startled him. Was he still dreaming? To hear a knock when he thought about Shirou knocking on the door. Debating on whether to answer or not, just to ignore it, it was the sound of another knock. Harder this time. Pushing himself to his feet, the few steps between the bed and the door disappeared, reaching and opening the door. The sight of who he wasn’t expecting to see standing outside his door.

The one who laid with his roommate looked slightly flushed, almost pleased but frowning, shifting from foot to foot. Narrowing his eyes, watching with little satisfaction as the snake stepped back. ”L-look, I know you’re not happy with me being with Shirou last night. It won’t be happening again. No matter how much I wish it.” He strained to catch the last words, the male looking away from his, as if gathering his thoughts or perhaps, coming with the terms of letting go. ”Just make him happy. Treat him the way he should be treated. Be true to your feelings. I’m sure he feels the same way about you.” Oushou’s hand raised before letting it fall to his side. A knowing nod before the smaller male shouldered his back and turned on his heel, leaving him to hear the click of the door closing behind him.

Shirou felt the same way as he did? That couldn’t be! He was sure that his friend was still waiting for his older brother to make a decision. But being told to be true to his feelings. Not to let Shirou suffer anymore, not to wait for Yonekuni to reject Shirou once again. Instead, he was going to steal the wolf away and make him his.

Quickly straightening his bed, looking down to realize that he hadn’t changed out of the clothes he wore the night before to dinner. Unbuttoning his shirt, he shrugged it off before making his way to the bathroom, ignoring the faint scent of the snake. Pushing down his pants, letting them pool at his feet before stepping out of them, turning on the water before ducking under the hot spray. Washing his hair, scrubbing away the sweat from the day before, though he would have preferred to get sweaty in a completely different way. Especially if it involved Shirou. He couldn’t help the silly grin that he knew was on his face, rinsing away the soap from his hair before washing up his body, paying special attention to his hard flesh. Curling his fingers around his length, imagining that his hand’s was the wolf’s. Smaller fingers teasing the head before working to make him come quickly. Softly panting out Shirou’s name, washing away the cum that stained his hand.

With the water off and slowly draining, he stepped out of the shower only hear the faint sounds in the hallway. Quickly wrapping a towel around his waist, letting it hang low enough to give the older male a tease, with the hopes that he’d catch Shirou’s interest. With a second, smaller towel, slowly drying his hair when the doorknob turned and the click of it opening. Licking his bottom lip and pretending to be surprised, he turned to see the half asleep male, half lidded eyes going wide as the male fully woke up at the sight of him.

“Hi-Hidekuni-,” the stuttering that fell from still swollen lips, the flush that had nothing to do with the night before and the lack of honorific that Shirou always used gave him hope, “I’m sorry.” Shirou turned to leave, his hand reaching out before he could stop himself, stopping Shirou from leaving.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” He said, a small smile trying to calm the canine down. The large shirt that the dark haired male wore, almost gaudy that it must have belonged to his brother, slipped off Shirou’s shoulder enough to give him a view of bare skin that seemed to be littered with marks that he longed to replace as his own. Swallowing back the growl when the scent that Shirou carried reached his nose, a scent that screamed of Oushou before dropping his hand away. Avoiding gray eyes as the pleasant atmosphere turned awkward.

The flush that graced the wolf’s cheeks darkened while both the scent and pheromones seemed to thicken while Shirou turned his body, as if blocking him from seeing the front of his body. Oushou’s words, spoken not even an hour ago, came back to him. The male hadn’t been sure about Shirou’s feelings for him, but now he knew. Keeping the feelings he felt down for now, eyes narrowing on the on the way the male seemed to chew on his lower lip. Hand moving on it’s own accord, reaching out to put a stop, thumb rubbing along the tender flesh only to suck in a breath when he felt the lick of a tongue.

If he were to look down, he would see the towel he wore start to strain from his rapidly hardening flesh. Forcing himself to move, lest he push the male up against the counter and fuck him until he removed all traces of the snake from the male’s mind and body. Walking past Shirou, making sure that his damp skin and just a hint of his attraction pheromones to get the canine worked up. Smiling at the choked moan, he reached the door before pausing and looking over his shoulder. Eyes enjoying the sight of Shirou’s hand caressing over the bulge in his pants.

“Shirou, it’s your birthday next week, isn’t it?” He asked, innocence written on his face. The jerk of a dark head, face flushed and lips wet.

“Y-y,” a swallow and a bite to a tender bottom lip once again, “yeah, it is.”

“Good,” he nearly purred as he opened the door, “keep that day open, okay?” He didn’t wait for a response and instead, headed back to his room to take care of his problem.

~

He took liberties on planning a dinner with Shirou for his birthday, even though he was unsure if the male had already made plans. He ended up telling his mother about his love interest, carefully explaining the situation between his brother and Shirou, inviting them to dinner as well, though if he knew what was to happen, he would have put a stop to dinner. Almost like a celebration for everyone. Shirou’s birthday and finishing up his education, completing what he sought out to do. And himself, getting accepted to the University of London back home. With the hope that he could get the male to come with him.

When he told Shirou about dinner earlier that morning, the surprised look on his face, along with a flash of sadness in the male’s eyes had him determined to get Shirou to come with him. By the time eight rolled around that evening, it was the knock on the door that had him letting his mother in, biting his tongue at the cool look in the older male’s eyes when Shirou flinched a little before following him down the stairs and to the waiting car. It seemed that despite what he told his mother, who most likely told his father, his words weren’t enough.

It was easy to see how uncomfortable Shirou was throughout dinner, as he was the only one attempting to make conversation that didn’t include his brother. Shortly halfway through dinner, he watched Shirou excuse himself, leaving him and his parents behind. As soon as Shirou was out of earshot, he turned to his mother and father, leveling a look at them. ”Why are you treating Shirou as if he was a criminal? He did nothing wrong!”

“He should stick by Yonekuni’s side, even if he’s been with others-” A glare at his father, interrupting him.

“He’s been cheating on Shirou for almost five years! You’re saying that he should be there, waiting for Yonekuni?” He watched his mother open his mouth, only to shut it while looking over his shoulder. His father looked at what caught his mother’s attention, the widening then narrowing of dark eyes.

The three of them watched Yonekuni escort a girl, who must have been close to his age, to table just several tables down from them. Nodding to his parents, quietly telling them to hold their mouth’s and comments. ”I told you.” He whispered quietly, as not to draw attention to themselves. Quietly pushing back his chair, suppressing his soul so his brother wouldn’t be able to pick up on him. Weaving between and around the tables, heading straight for the bathroom, meeting and stopping Shirou as he emerged.

“Shirou, you might want to suppress your soul,” he struggled to explain to the confused male, but the words seemed to zap all the confusion away, “Yonekuni showed up.” The sadness that he saw in gray eyes earlier returned, a slight and almost hesitant nod.

“I understand.” The calm expression, almost neutral, settled on the heavyweight’s face. A look that didn’t suit Shirou at all. When he was sure he couldn’t detect anything from the wolf, he lead the male back to their tables. Both his parents kept their gaze down on their plates, only looking up to speak or chance a glance at the blond, who seemed to sulk while the girl across from him chatted. By the time they took their seats once again, the coldness that had been in his parents eyes were gone, replaced by sympathy. Quiet words were spoken as he tried to cheer Shirou up, who only gave him forced smiles. He couldn’t help but notice Shirou’s eyes seemed to seek out Yonekuni. About to wave over the waiter to bring out the cake he specially ordered, in attempts to distract the wolf, it was the sound of the one Shirou had been eyeing that stopped him. Voice loud and shocked, catching everyone’s attention around them.

“What do you mean “You’re pregnant”!?”


	4. Chapter 4

Within seconds of the deceleration, those around them and further out as the restaurant slowly became silent. Patrons all around paused their quiet conversations, looking over with curiosity while others, though curious like a few, gave an almost disgust look. Thinking that the one who made that deceleration had no manners, to know that you shouldn’t shout. Heads turned their attention to the irate blond who pushed out his chair to stare at the woman while others turned to watch the guest he brought. ”You drag me here, insisting on coming here on my day off, all to tell m that “You’re pregnant” Is it even mine?”

It was as if you could hear a pin drop on the floor, even the waiters and waitresses stopped what they were doing, watching the blond take his seat once again. Everyone intent on finding out what was going to happen next. They didn’t hear the girl’s response, but it didn’t seem to matter any more. Looking to his right, intent on seeing how Shirou was taking the news that Yonekuni didn’t have the guts to tell him in private, though he could announce it in public for everyone to hear. He could see the faint shimmer of tears in the male’s gray eyes and the choked sound before he felt it. Before everyone felt it. The strong flare as Shirou looked up.

Those of madararui descent looked over towards their table, especially the blond that the other patrons were watching closely. The murmuring as several seemed to inch closer, intrigued by the hint of what they caught of Shirou’s soul. ”What a birthday, Shirou.” Hidekuni heard the male whisper, watching gray eyes lower to the table, blinking away the tears that had been gathering in the wolf’s eyes. The flare that had everyone’s attention slowly died down until it disappeared, as if never happened at all. Out of the corner of his eye, catching movements as the one person who had everyone’s attention approached their table.

“S-Shirou! What are you doing here?!” The question, though in reality, it was more like a demand in the form of a question Yonekuni had shot off at his friend. Shooting a glare at his older brother, he held his tongue while the rest of the patrons, the ones that didn’t return to their meals, held their breath wanting to know what would happen next.

“Well-, I uh, was having dinner with Hidekuni-kun. He treated me on this day, trying to cheer me up, a dinner with him and his family. A birthday dinner, you see.” Words stiff with politeness that was woven in the male’s character from birth. The flinch on his brother’s face would have been hilarious if the situation was completly different.

“B-birthday? It’s your birthday?” The humorless laugh as Shirou pushed back his chair and stood. The sadness that Shirou felt seemed to come off of him in waves, he licked his lips and nodded to his parents. The night was ruined beyond repair with the blond’s deceleration, Shirou’s birthday was ruined and all because Yonekuni couldn’t keep himself in his pants. He would pay his parents back for the dinner, instead of paying for it at the end, after giving Shirou the cake and his gift. He reached for Shirou’s hand to comfort his friend, the low growl that came from the reptile. The painful grasp on his shoulder and the words of “Don’t touch him!” reached his ears.

“He can touch me all he wants. He’s my friend, Madarame, even more so than you.” Shirou’s voice was soft, ringing with both sadness and finalization. As if the male was coming to the conclusion of how everything would end. ”Madarame, Hidekuni-kun has been there for me. He and Oushou are my friends-,” a small smile, “my best friends. He and Oushou have stood with me through thick and thin. You’re supposed to be my boyfriend, Madarame, mine. To be there with me and for me. To touch me like a loved one should be touched.” A laugh, though if he was going to be honest with himself, it sounded more like a dry sob. ”I’ve been waiting for years. Waiting for you to come to terms with how you feel about me. I said I’d wait for you. But now, I can’t wait any more.”

A deep breath as Shirou closed his eyes, he knew his friend was getting ready to close a chapter in his life. One that would be hard to deal with.

“Madarame, you’ve proven time and time again to be possessive and yet, unfaithful. I’ve remembered your birthday every year, which you seemed to forget. Every year, I tried to celebrate your birthday. Dinner and a gift, all were pretty much ignored. And yet, you could never even bother to remember my birthday. This year, a birthday gift from you is the news that you got some girl that you’re dating-”

“I’m not dating her!” The interruption did nothing for Yonekuni’s case, as Shirou swallowed hard and continued, as if the blond hadn’t spoken up.

“Pregnant.” His heart clenched tightly at the tears that slowly slipped down Shirou’s pale cheeks. ”You’re willing to touch any and every girl that you meet and yet, string me along with false promises. You didn’t want me getting close to anyone. You’re like a child with a toy, jealous of anyone who showed interest but the minute someone turned away, you forgot about me.” Hands clenching at Shirou’s sides, he could only imagine the indentations of Shirou’s fingernails against the palms of the heavyweight’s hands. Wincing at the tightening of the male’s hands, he watched Shirou swallow and turn to him, looking at him with such pain shadowing gray eyes.

“I-I can’t do this any more Madarame. I can’t keep my promise any more. I’ts over. I just can’t wait for someone who doesn’t want me. G-Good bye.” The opening of his mouth to tell Shirou to wait for him, to hold on but the wolf moved fast, halfway through the still restaurant. The minute the doors that Shirou had just passed through closed, the murmuring and whispering began. Most, if not all, were sympathetic towards Shirou and the way the breakup happened.

“Why didn’t you do this in private, Yonekuni?” The reasoning in his mother’s voice as he shook his head in disappointment. ”I thought you were raised better than this.”

Thoughts raced through his head, his gift still sitting in his pocket, the one he was going to present to the canine at the end of the meal. He wanted to feel bad for his brother, but he couldn’t find it in himself to feel that way. The shocked look on Yonekuni’s face was all that the blond deserved for breaking Shirou’s heart. ”You got what you deserve, brother. If anyone is to blame, it’s yourself.” He turned to his parents as he nodded once again. ”I’ll see the both of you in two weeks.” Keys in his pockets, he pushed back his chair and followed after Shirou with the shouted words that followed him, the angry and desperate words of “Not to fucking touch him!”

The further away he got from the speculation, the quieter it became, watching people move out of his way. Chancing a look over his shoulder, seeing both his mother and father struggling to restrain Yonekuni from coming after them. The change of heart, seeing how the reptile had treated Shirou, he knew that right now, he had their blessings. Pushing the heavy doors open, slipping past and out into the chilly spring air, he looked around for any sight of the distraught wolf. The faint sound of his name, the sight of the male with his back to the wall and red rimmed eyes, a crumbled tissue in Shirou’s hand. Joining Shirou at his side, Hidekuni could only curse his brother for making him cry.

“I’m sorry, Hidekuni-kun,” a sniffle as the wolf wiped at his nose before tossing the used tissue into the trash can that sat off to the side. ”I didn’t mean to cause you a scene and ruin the dinner that you had planned.” Unable to understand why Shirou was blaming himself, he grabbed Shirou’s hand and slowly lead him away from the restaurant. The slight tugging, the resistance as Shirou tried to tug his hand away, he only tightened his grasp and said what Shirou had been thinking.

“I don’t care if anyone see’s me holding your hand. I’m not ashamed. I’ve never been ashamed of you, Shirou.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the darkening of cheeks, even with what light the streetlamps gave off. Giving Shirou’s hand a squeeze, he quietly added, “You have nothing to be sorry for. It wasn’t your fault at ll. I’m sorry that your birthday was ruined,” kicked at the ground as they walked, “I wanted tonight to be special for you. With you finishing up school and graduating and me, being accepted to the University of London back home, I-uh,” the sudden feel of bashfulness hit him, “wanted to give you your birthday present.” He knew he was blushing, feeling his cheeks heating up further.

“Hidekuni-kun,” Shirou started, peeking at the blond and coloring again, “is-uh, the offer to join you back home still home?” The grip on his hand tightened as blue eyes widened and the jaguar ducked his head.

“Yeah. I mean, yes, it is.” He thought quietly to himself, he already weighed the pros and cons for this decision and because of what happened less than an hour ago solidified his decision.

“Can I say yes to the offer then?” The nodding of a blond head and for the first time since earlier that day, when he awoke to the knowledge that it was his birthday, he gave himself a small spark of hope. He had given the idea some thought, the business card that his professor gave him and hoped that things would look up for his future. The slight tug had him looking up from the ground, seeing Hidekuni pull him towards the curb as he let go of his hand to flag down a passing taxi.

“It’ll be faster this way.” The younger male explained, guiding him to the vehicle that pulled up slowly. Hidekuni held the door open for him, slipping inside and moving to the farthest side of the taxi, buckling himself in and turning to watch his friend do the same. Sitting quietly as Hidekuni gave thee driver the address, hidekuni turned to him. The shy smile and warm fingers that curled around his.

“Can I ask why you came to this decision?”

Swallowing slowly, he looked away from the friendly face and looked out the window. He hadn’t been expecting that question. As if the blond knew his hesitancy to answer the question, he quickly spoke. ”It’s only, I don’t want you regretting coming with me, making this decision on a whim and regretting it soon after.”

Biting his lip, he waited a minute before answering, the truth spilling from his lips. ”Last week, a professor of mine gave me a business card. F-for a publishing company that’s located in London. He suggested that because I did so well in his class, that I’d be perfect for a position with them. I’ve been thinking about it since you actually asked me that one night.” He confessed quietly, chewing on his lower lip while turning his gaze from the window to Hidekuni. ”The scene that-,” the hitch in his voice before clearing his throat to start again. ”What happened earlier was just the final nail in the coffin. I was hesitant at first, but to see Madarame and his new girl, to find out that he impregnated her. That-that was what made me decide.” The light that danced in Hidekuni’s eyes, the hint of a smile and the way the male ducked his head as he blushed.

Te rest of the drive was made in silence, watching the jaguar pay the driver before heading up the stairs to their apartment. A brush of a shoulder against his as they reached to door. Reaching for his keys in his pocket, he didn’t have to look over his shoulder to know that the nekomata waas closer to him than he usually was. Almost feeling the hot breath against his neck, a brush of a thigh against his legs.

“Hidekuni-ku-” turning as he opened the door, the hungry look in his friend’s blue eyes had his breath freezing in his chest. ”I know we’re just friends now and after what happened tonight, all I want to do is pull you in my arms. Kiss away all the pain in your heart until all you think, the only think you can think of is me.” Blue eyes looked around before dragging him inside, slamming the door close behind them and locked the door. ”Can, can I just hold you?”

For the first time since he met the jaguar, Hidekuni looked vulnerable, unlike the proud animal he was. A lick to his lips and the smile to the younger male’s face. ”I-I’m just going to get changed.” The jaguar rushed out, faint coloring dusting his cheeks before leaving him alone in the living room. Shaking himself out of the lull he was in, going to each of the wings, making sure that they were locked and closing the curtains. Heart both aching and pounding, the steps to his bedroom disappeared, stepping inside to only freeze at the sheepish look the blond wore. Hidekuni sat on the edge of the bed, clad only in pajama bottoms that he must have rushed to throw on while his chest was bare for him to see. Only imagining how quickly the male must have ripped of his clothes, he hid the smile before turning, slowly reaching and pulling off the suit he wore. Hanging it back up to washed. Each button of his shirt was carefully unbuttoned, tugged from the waist band of his pants. Trying to pretend that he didn’t know that Hidekuni was watching him, keeping his head down to hide the blush as he slowly worked out of his pants, setting them to the side as well. As he pulled on his pajama bottoms, chancing a look out of the corner of his eye, catching the hungry look that Hidekuni had.

Swallowing, he didn’t notice the nervous way his hand shook as it reached for a shirt, grabbing not his pajama shirt, but some random shirt before turning back to the bed. It was then that he couldn’t hide the nervousness he felt as he laid down. The younger male followed his movements and the minute his head hit his pillow, arms from behind wrapped around him and pulled him close, almost forcing his back against the bare chest. It was the soft murmuring of his name that had him closing his eyes, telling him to let go the painful memories of awful confrontation earlier.

~

He could only watch quietly as the one across from him cried silently, tears falling down pale cheeks as the male spoke to him. He didn’t pay much attention to what Shirou was saying, only thinking. How could he have gotten caught? He knew that the male knew about him and the girls and while he thought that the canine was okay with that arrangement, content to wait for him, the news that he got a girl, that girl he escorted into the restaurant pregnant. He wasn’t stupid, catching the looks his brother sent his partner. The friendly looks that barely masked the want in Hidekuni’s eyes, but up until that moment, he was Shirou would ignore the advances. Hearing the words that the wolf “Couldn’t wait for him” and “Goodbye”. Watching Shirou walk away from him, away from them and the relationship they built together. He watched his brother fallow the male, ignoring his date in favor of trying to follow, struggling to get past the table that his father and his husband sat at.

“Stop it! LET ME GO! I need to-”

“What you need to do, Yonekuni, is calm down.” His father told him gently, calmly, pushing back before looking around, sending everyone back to their own conversations with one look. Though he knew better, they were more interested in what just happened, most likely speculating what would happen next.

“You’ll never accomplish anything now, Yonekuni, if all you do is just storm after him. What will you say? And how can you explain yourself?” His father turned to his husband and quietly talked to David, watching the dark haired male nod before pushing back his chair, leaving them to them selves. Hands itching, curling into fists as his side, he spun on his heel and bypassed the table that he occupied with his date, heading straight for the bar, all the while knowing that his father and the dog followed him. Ordering a bottle of the strongest sake they had, quickly paying before heading to a small table in the corner, almost hiding away from others. He didn’t care that the two had taken a seat, his father sitting across from him and the girl at his side.

“Why,” he asked the girl as he opened the bottle and poured himself a shot inn the shot glass that the bartender provided him, “did you choose a restaurant for telling me that you’re pregnant? Why not some place private? Where no one can over hear.” The girl, whose name he never really bothered to learn, even though he fucked her several times over the course of a month.

“Well, I thought it would be a perfect setting for the news. I could tell you and you, you’d be happy-”

“Why would you think I’d be happy to hear that you’re knocked up? You cost me the one person who was waiting for me!” It was if the girl didn’t hear him, watching her turn to his father and chat happily. Catching the look his father gave him before pulling out his cellphone and calling the one number that he hadn’t dialed in so long. The ringing of the number, holding onto his hope that Shirou would pick up and the elation when he heard the click. But the sound of the recording of Shirou’s voice, leaving a message before pulling the phone back, staring and sighing, pushing the button to end the call.

“So, what do you have to say about me being pregnant?” Brown eyes looked away from his father and to him, he bit his tongue to keep from saying something hurtful and instead, turned his attention back to his shot glass and his phone. Sure, he dreamt of a child, but with Shirou as he slowly, ever so slowly, came to know what he fell for the wolf.

“Yonekuni.” He looked up, the grim look on his father’s face, mouth opening before closing and looking away from eyes just like his. Just a shake of his head as the older male pushed back his chair, getting ready to leave. ”I was hoping that Hidekuni was lying or exaggerating about your behavior or treatment of and to Fujiwara-san. In fact, I treated-, no, David and I treated him bad this evening because of what we thought. Yonekuni,” the heaviness of his father’s words seemed to sink into his soul, “I hope you’re prepared to deal with the ramifications of Fujiwara-san ending the the relationship. There are others, especially Hidekuni, who are interested in the male. Good luck with the news of your upcoming family.” The tilt of a blond head, the older reptile leaving him alone to drink away his miseries.

Shooting his father a glare, about to get up when the girl’s hand on his stopped him. ”Why are you so determined that the child isn’t yours? And who is this “Fujiwara”? Was he the one you wanted to go after?” He heard the snort of disgust before sighing and pouring another shot, closing his eyes to push away the image of Shirou’s tear stained face that seemed to be burned in his memory.

“I don’t believe the child is mine since I know I’m not the only one you’ve slept with.” Through narrowed eyes, he watched her open her mouth to protest, giving her a hard look. ”If it’s mine, i’ll do what I have to do to take care of it. But if it’s not, I won’t lift a finger to help.” Downing the shot, he sighed once more. ”Shirou, he’s-, was my partner. Has been since before we finished school. He promised ot wait for me until I’m ready with what I feel for him.”

~

Slowly awakening from the light slumber he was in, the warmth against his back startling him to fully consciousness. Attempting to sit up, wanting to look around and look behind up, but the bare arms around his chest prevented him from doing so, bringing him back to light. Back to what happened the night before. Looking over his shoulder, moving awkwardly to brush away blond begs from the sleeping male’s forehead before turning back on his side, back into the position he was originally in. Glancing at the clock that sat on his dresser and through blurry eyes, he could make out the time. He hadn’t been asleep that long, only for a few hours.

Closing his eyes, willing himself back to sleep, it was the feel of gentle movements from his chest as hands slowly searched, discovered. The feel of hard flesh pressing against him and the breathy sounds in his ear, a low moan that faintly resembled his name. Clenching his eyes tightly close, biting back sounds of pleasure when large hands slid down from his chest, pausing at the waist back of his pants, almost hesitant before continuing, slipping inside. Finger ran along his naked length, the smooth caress of fingertips before long digits curled around him while a free hand rubbed along his hip, winding his body up more.

A sound, muffled by shoving his hand across his mouth when the hand on his hip moved further back, in between. Gently caressing one cheek, fingertips tracing patters that neither knew as a single finger inched inward. Almost in determination, seeking what it wanted from him.

The sound of distant knocking, over the sound of his rapidly beating heart, over the harshness that was his breath. Body stiffening in Hidekuni’s arms. What was he doing? Why was he taking advantage of his friend’s kindness? The younger male was just trying to calm him down, help him ease the pain of a broken heart, the pain of the break up. Scolding himself for getting into this mess, willing his body to relax, to slow down and despite everything, he couldn’t help the throb of want his body gave. Hands pulling away, one returning to his chest while the other covered his eyes, preventing him from looking around and maybe from getting up to answer the desk.

“Don’t worry, Shirou,” the sleep laden voice whispered hoarsely in his ear, “don’t think and just relax. Sleep now.”

Breathing slowly as he could, the hands covering his eyes fell away while he left his eyes close, barely caught the words of apology, murmured into the side of his neck, though he could feel the insistent push of Hidekuni’s hard flesh against him. If it were another day, with no reminders of what happened, he would have turned over to reassure the male that it was okay and that he didn’t mind the touch. As it was, he bit his lip to quiet the frustration that had built up inside him at Yonekuni’s actions.

He held his breath as the canine in his arms calmed down, the breathing evening out before releasing the breath he held. Cursing himself for giving into his desires, wondering what had caused Shirou to panic in his arms before remembering that he heard the knock on the door, almost pounding. Extracting himself form the bed, moving slowly as not to wake the male that was slowly drifting off to sleep. Pulling up the blankets that had been kicked to the foot of the bed. The pounding of the door again, closing the bedroom door softly before grabbing a shirt from his room and back down the hallway. A peek through the small peep hole before unlocking and opening the door just widen enough to see his two older brothers.

“Hidekuni?” The shake of a dark head, as if Kunimasa didn’t want to think about it. he didn’t look at the blond that his older brother was attempting to hold up. The slight swaying of Yonekuni’s body, as if the heavyweight was having trouble staying upright, which was most likely true, with the smell of alcohol wafting from him. ”What the hell happened? I get a call from a woman, who did not tell me her name, told me to come and pick Yonekuni up at a bar.”

Biting down on the inside of his cheek, knowing he’d have to tell his older brother the truth, as much as he didn’t want to. But he couldn’t do it here. ”I’ll tell you, but not here. He,” a jerk of his head towards the drunk blond, “can’t stay here.” Movement of his hand, towards the inside of the apartment. ”Let me get my shoes on and I’ll tell you when we get him home.” Kunimasa’s dark eyes narrowed at him, almost processing the words before stiffly nodding his head.

Moving quickly back inside, penning a quick note to Shirou in case the canine woke up while he was gone before snagging his keys. Wallet shoved in his pocket and shoes slipped on before locking the door, closing it softly behind him. Joining Kunimasa in helping the blond back down the stairs and down to the street. Under the weight of the nearly unconscious male, luck seemed to be on his side as a lone taxi on the empty street spotted the hand that Kunimasa shoved into the air, slowly coming to a stop just a few feet of the curb.

Out the window, looking at the darkened buildings and windows while Kunimasa gave the address of his own home. He wasn’t surprised much when the nekomata didn’t give the driver Yonekuni’s address, which was just as well. He didn’t have the urge to step foot in the reptile’s apartment. Only able to imagine how it looked and most likely, if not completely, reeking of females that he fucked.

The ride was slow, made in silence, broken only by the faint mumbling of Yonekuni. At which, both brothers looked away uncomfortably. Neither wanted to see their brother like that, pathetic as he was when he was that low. Holding the weight of his older brother while Kunimasa paid the driver, watching as the dark haired male returned, taking up Yonekuni’s other side before he spoke up.

“It’s Shirou’s birthday. Or was, actually, last night.” He caught the slight nod of understanding. ”I treated him for his birthday. Took him out for dinner as well as desert, hoping to cheer him up. Well- ” He paused as they reached the door to Kunimasa’s and Norio’s apartment, following the older male inside before handing Yonekuni to his brother. ”Yonekuni showed up with a girl. He obviously didn’t know that not only was it Shirou’s birthday but that Shirou was there. More concerned about shouting at his date, with her being pregnant and all.” Taking the offered bottle of water, removing the top and taking a long drink, catching the shake of a dark head. Kunimasa didn’t approve of Yonekuni’s treatment of Shirou, either it seemed.

“Shirou ended it right there, right there in the restaurant In front of everyone to see. Said he didn’t want him.” He smiled to himself, finishing over half the bottle of water before pushing himself off the couch, he needed to get back soon. Back to the apartment and slip back into Shirou’s bed. ”I can make my move now. He lost his chance and I want to make Shirou happy.” Leveling a look at Kunimasa, seeing the barely hidden disgust in his brother’s eyes. ”I don’t care if you don’t approve, I know what you’re thinking. I care for him-” Stopping himself from saying more, snapping his mouth shut.

“Why are you always after leftovers? Sniffing after someone else’s partner? Acting like a scavenger the minute one’s back is turned to steal away whatever you can.” The low bark like laugh, the chill in Kunimasa’s voice struck a chord in him. ”First Norio and Fujiwara? Can’t get anyone on your own.”

Biting down hard on his bottom lip, anger rising up in his throat and chest before his hand curled tightly around the bottle of water, the crinkle of plastic and the droplets of water. He shouldn’t have been holding anything, setting the irreparable bottle to the side before heading to the front door. ”If this is the way you treating me because I fell for someone who was dating someone else, then I won’t bother you any more. Good bye, big brother.” He didn’t bother looking back, closing the front door quietly behind him, forcing himself to move. Down the stairs, reaching the street, he shoved his hands in his pockets as the walked away, lost in thought. Too frustrated to take a taxi, he shot those that approached him a glare that had them changing their mind. He never thought that Kunimasa would act that way towards him, alienating him and now, Shirou.

Losing track of time, it was the hint of the sun that slowly started to rise that he realized how long and how far he walked. Of how he didn’t remember reaching the apartment building. Slowly taking the stairs, fishing for his keys from his pockets, he gave a sigh of relief when the inside of the apartment stood dark and silent. Still too wound up to slip back into bed, he closed the door softly behind him before toeing off his shoes and dropping onto the couch. It hurt to think that his brother thought so little of, accusing him. Instead of being happy for him, accusing him of being a thief, though he didn’t approve of Yonekuni’s actions against Shirou. Shaking and dropping his head into his hands and closed his eyes.

Was he actually ready to take on the world? Enter into a relationship with his feelings still new to him, let alone not knowing how Shirou felt about him. What if he were to ask, baring his heart out only to be rejected. It was the feel of a warm hand against his cheek, startling him from his thoughts that his head jerked up. The small, hesitant smile and the concern in the male’s gray eyes and he knew. Knew right then and there the answers to all his questions. He had a chance that he wouldn’t pass up, knowing he’d never have another chance. Wouldn’t let go, no matter what others or his family said about him and Shirou.

“Hidekuni-kun? What’s wrong?” The wolf took a seat next to him on the couch, a comforting hand on his. And though he knew the movement was meant to comfort, he couldn’t help but wish for more then friendship.

“What-, what would you say if I could-” He shook his head, no, it wasn’t the right time yet. ”It’s nothing, would you, uh, like something to eat?” Smooth, covering up what he actually wanted to say. Frustrated with everything, standing up forcibly and stalked into the kitchen, unaware that he was mumbling as he pulled out what he needed to make breakfast.

“Are you regretting asking me to join you, Hidekuni-kun?”

Nearly dropping the heavy pot, catching it before it slipped out of his hand and onto his foot. ”W-what makes you ask that?” He turned as he asked, his eyes wide as he watched Shirou look away self consciously.

“It’s just, you weren’t here when I woke up several hours ago. And now, there’s something you want ask but-”

Quickly shoving the pot onto the counter, ignoring the clinking of glass in favor of approaching Shirou as the male stood at the edge of the kitchen. Looking almost afraid, heart already broken and now, the male thought he was regretting asking him. Pulling the heavyweight into his arms, feeling Shirou’s arms slowly come up to wrap around him while he rested his head on the wolf’s shoulder. ”I wanted to ask you, been thinking about this for so long. Ever since I came to terms with what I feel. I wanted to ask if you’d like to go out. Like dating, I mean. But I figured you-, no, that it wasn’t the right time to ask such a question.”

The stiffening of the canine’s body as he held Shirou, feeling the older male starting to pull away. Letting his arms drop to his sides, stepping back to watch and wait for Shirou’s reaction to his words. This was the reason that he didn’t want to bring up the question, afraid that he’d startle the male and alienate Shirou to the point that he’d lose his friendship and more, so much more, with the wolf.

“Hidekuni-kun,” Shirou began as he looked back at him, almost fidgeting, “I won’t lie and say that I haven’t thought about it. I’m not sure, at this moment at least.” A swallow and lick to lips, “Given with what happened yesterday, I’m a little hesitant. But,” Shirou chewed on his bottom lip and he could feel the excitement build in him “I want to.” Seeing the coloring to cheeks and the way gray eyes darted to him. ”I-, uh, liked it when you touched me last night,” more restless movement as if Shirou were reliving what he did to him just hours. ”If I say yes, can we go slow? I’m not exactly ready to enter a relationship.”

He found himself nodding rather quickly and if Shirou needed plenty of time, he’d give all that the male needed.

~

He never thought of how much work went into preparing for a trip would take so much time. So much work. With not knowing how long he’d be over there or if he’d ever be back here. The necessary paper work that went into working over seas, filing as well as sorting everything with his parents, he didn’t have time to miss someone one who never gave him much work. With the work visa approved, the interview with the publishing company his professor named, Shirou was just about ready to leave behind the painful memories of a lost love.

The sweet way the nekomata seemed to pamper him, making him feel wanted. Just before Hidekuni had to leave, the young blond took him out on his first actual date, surprised to hear that he’d never been on one. A movie that they both liked, sitting in the back of the theater like a real couple. Shirou smiled to himself at that memory, the ache in his chest didn’t seem as sharp to him, not with the calls that kept up his spirits.

The phone in his pocket went off with a familiar melody, vibrating softly against his thigh and he smiled to himself as he recognized Hidekuni’s ringtone. Toeing off his shoes, pulling out the small device and answering, the deep voice he’d come to love greeting him. A skip in his heart at the light words, deep down he was wishing that the nekomata wasn’t so far away right now. Hidekuni had left for home just a week ago, after attending a small graduation party for both him and Oushou, though it was easy to remember the tension between the two males. That was, until Oushou’s mother dragged him away, scolding him for leaving his date alone. A date that was his marriage prospect. Though he told the male he wanted to take things slow, his body wanted to be touched again. The pleasure Oushou gave him lit a fire inside him that wanted to be stroked again. To burn more and hotter, to be touched by the younger male.

Giving Hidekuni the flight information, hanging up when noise on the other end of the phone, the younger male regrettably had to go. Whispering goodbye, hanging up from the call before he slipped out of his clothes and hanging them back up. Changing into a spare change of clothes, everything else was already packed, looking around his room once more. Everything he would need, which wasn’t a whole lot, was ready to be shipped.

It had been a few weeks since that disastrous dinner that was his birthday, since the last time he saw Yonekuni and he knew that it was for the best. Being possessive of someone and yet, showing them no love, emotion or attention, he couldn’t stand it. Of course, the dirty looks Kunimasa shot him when he saw him around wasn’t the worst. After everything they’d been through, he thought he had forged a small friendship in the dark haired male. But after what Hidekuni confessed over breakfast that one morning, the rejection and alienation was to be expected, though it hurt him to know what Hidekuni was going through.

A hesitant knock on the front door, pulling him from his thoughts of his younger boyfriend. He tried to suppress the small smile and failing, he closed the door to his bedroom as the knock on the door became a little louder, more persistent. It couldn’t be Oushou, he had a key and would move in once he left. Which made things easier on him, since he wouldn’t have to worry about finding a renter to take care of the apartment. And easier on his best friend, since he got hired as a gym teacher for a middle school just blocks away.

When the third knock came, he sighed and answered, wondering who would visit him at such a late hour. He soon fount out the minute he unlocked the door, stepping back when the visitor slammed the door open with a viscous bang against the wall. ”M-Madarame?” The look in blue eyes, faint murmuring when he stepped back again, only to have the larger blond follow him.

“Shirou…”

Feeling his heart clench at the sound of his name, spoken in a way that he only dreamed about. ”Madarame, what-,” he shook his head, clearing the thoughts of what his soul was whispering to him. ”What are you doing here?” He asked, waiting quietly for an answer. He was patient, learned from early on that being rushed and hurried wasn’t for everyone. When the reptile remained silent, he sighed and headed for the kitchen. Opening the refrigerator and grabbing two bottles of water. One set on one end of the table while he set his on the other, grabbing a single glass. The click of the door and the nearly silent footsteps as Yonekuni walked in and took a seat right where he set the bottle of water down.

“Madarame, for the past couple of years, you’ve made it quiet clear that you wanted me to wait for you. I promised and I waited. Waited for so long, but you didn’t seem to want me, did you?” Staring down at the bottle, quietly opening the bottle before fingering the paper label, looking up a minute later. ”I’m tired of waiting. I told you that back at the restaurant. I”m not going to wait any-” He started to explain, only to be interrupted by a low voice, he could only imagine the desperation that seemed to underline Yonekuni’s words.

“But what if the kid’s not mine?”

Words he never thought the blond would utter, startling him. He didn’t think about that, but how could Yonekuni be so cruel? ”What does that have to do with anything? If its yours, you’ll have to do the right thing. As much as it hurts me to say this, you’ll need to be a part of that child’s life.” Trying to keep his voice neutral, it wasn’t any of his business anymore.

“It has everything to do with it! If this kid’s not mine, would you come back to me?”

Swallowing and nearly choking on the mouthful of water, he coughed before wiping away at his eyes and mouth. He never thought about it, never gave it any thought about giving in and forgiving him. ”C-can you honestly,” he gave his head a shake, “you honestly expect me to for give you for cheating and sleeping with all those women, for getting one of them pregnant?” Pushing away from the table, walking up and down the length of the kitchen, pacing. ”How can you even ask me that? I’m forgiving, Madarame, but even I have my limits.” Dropping back into his chair, narrowing his eyes at the quiet blond. ”I can’t Yonekuni. We can remain friends, but that’s all we’ll ever be from now on Anyway, I’m leaving in a few days.”

The widening then the narrowing of blue eyes, so Yonekuni seemed to be affected by his words then he let on.

“Leaving? Where and with who?” The demand left his lips before he could stop himself, burning inside at the thought. He fucked up royally and that was the only reason he showed up at Shirou’s tonight, to try and get Shirou back to his side. But this news, the panic like feeling that filled him at the words that Shirou was leaving. Was he leaving the city? Moving away for something? Or was it something else?

“I have a job interview with a company-er, a publishing company in London and if I get the job, it’ll be a few years.”

London? A slow shake of his head, curling his fingers around the plastic water bottle, ignoring the crinkling of plastic. ”With who?!” The only person who lived there, with an interest in the wolf…

“No, don’t tell me…” His fingers crushed the helpless plastic, crushing it to the point of destroying the bottle. ”Hidekuni.” His lip curled in disgust as the name left his tongue. He thought his brother was getting awfully close to the male. ”Are you fucking him?”

The rapid paling of Shirou’s face, jumping to his own conclusion, answering his own question. ”You are, aren’t you? You’re fucking him. Telling me about my cheating and you’re fucking him.” He gave a bitter laugh. The sound of hands slamming down on the table, startling him, though he wouldn’t admit it. The flushed look on Shirou’s face reminded him of their one time together, though the passion that he remembered was replaced by anger that the male gave off. If Shirou’s soul were out, he knew lips would be curled up on his muzzle, teeth bared.

“Even if I was sleeping with him, which I haven’t, it wouldn’t be any of your business, Madarame-”

“Then why won’t you come back to me? If you’re not acting like such a whore and fucking him, you should come back to me. The way you claimed to love me.” The minute the words left his mouth, watching the males eyes fill up with tears. Maybe he went too far, cursing his quick tongue.

“A-a whore. You’re calling me a whore, despite your actions. Cruel, Madarame.” A sniff as the male pulled off his glasses, hands brushing away the rapidly falling tears. ”Go, just-just go.”

“But-” He tried, getting up out of his chair to reach up, laying his hand on Shirou’s shoulder. The rapid and sudden flare of a soul he hadn’t seen in so long, the slap of a hand and deep growl. Gray eyes flashed, narrowed while teeth that Shirou started to bare, elongating before the loud “GO!” was uttered. Stepping back, a warning sound before doing what Shirou ordered. Chancing a look over his shoulder, the sight of shoulders shaking. Crying. Even more so then at the restaurant. He fucked up even more so, shoving his hands in his pockets, closing the front door and freezing at the sound of glass shattering, as if thrown at the front door.

Wondering how he was or even how to approach Shirou in order to fix things. What even possessed him to call the wolf a whore when the male himself had been faithfully waiting for him. No, he couldn’t walk away. turning on his heel, the few steps back to the door and reaching for the door knob. Locked. Knocking becoming pounding at the door, hoping that deep down, the heavyweight would forgive him and let him in. Ignoring the neighbors that opened their doors to tell him to stop. Barely hearing the slide and click of the lock, holding his breath, the unfriendly look that Shirou wore had the words on his tongue die.

“I told you to leave, why are you still here? Hoping that I would forgive you?” The red rimmed eyes, tear tracks that had barely started to dry seemed to glisten, getting ready for more. ”You called me a whore, Madarame, a whore! I’ve been by your side while you fucked and every girl that you met. And you call me a whore?”

A bit on his tongue, the flinch at the harsh words. The male never cursed, to be pushed to curse, he wouldn’t be getting any type of forgiveness soon. ”How cruel you are, Madarame. You’ve sunken to a new low.”

And with that, he closed the door, locking and securing the door, barely making it into his room before he broke down. Reaching for his cellphone, his fingers paused before dialing the number, uncertain on how the younger blond would take to being interrupted.

~

Boxes shipped, the few he had. One last gaze to the apartment that he spent the past four years in, good times and bad. And now, it was time to let go. Turning to Oushou, who stood just a few feet away, handing him the key. Of course, Oushou already had his own key but since he was now leaving, he was giving his childhood friend and one time lover his key. He told his friend about what happened earlier that week, the displeasure his best friend had in his voice about Yonekuni. He didn’t want to tell him, but being caught red eyed, ending up letting what happened slipped.

Behind Oushou, off to the side, was Oushou’s partner from the omiai that he had went to. Though they were “testing the waters” before making any sort of commitment, he knew it would all work out. He understood the cool like attitude that the male had given him, keeping his distance before nodding to his friend. The honk of the taxi’s horn and the words of “Make sure he makes you happy.” Smiling back and a nod to the larger male, who seemed to eye Oushou more now that he was about to leave.

Pulling his suitcase behind him, watching the driver load it up while he climbed into the back sat, giving the area one last look around before settling in for the trip to the airport. Feeling his cellphone vibrate, glad that he had set it on vibrate before leaving, he glanced at the small screen. The one number that had been calling him repeatedly. Ignoring the call, shutting down the device before paying the as he collected his bag. Walking away from the curb and into the large building. Swallowing down the nervousness he felt, he pushed himself to leave behind the past to look forward to the future.

~

It seemed that he had pace the length of the small apartment, up and down. Back to the same spot before continuing once more. The apartment that he had spent his free time cleaning as much as he could, trying to make it livable, since no one had lived in it for years. Rent was taken care of, left to him by a late uncle that he only met a few, brief times. The time that he hadn’t been cleaning was spent trying to keep himself calm, knowing that it would only be a short amount of time before the wolf was with him. The phone call he received just a week after he had left, recalling the memory of Shirou’s pained voice and the words that he had to coax out of the wolf. Calming himself, glancing at the clock, even though he already knew that a short amount of time had passed since he last checked and gave up waiting at home. Keys in hand, shoes on, he locked the apartment and headed out to pick up his boyfriend.

Hidekuni smiled to himself, Shirou had told him about the job interview, the hop in the male’s voice and he crossed his fingers, praying that the heavyweight got the job. He would admit that he was selfish when it came to love, would do whatever he could to get the canine to stay in the country with him and away from his brother. After what happened, he knew that Yonekuni would be a problem for the both of them if they were to stay in Japan.

By the time he made it to the airport, cursing traffic and rush hour, he caught the sound of the arriving flight. Glancing around, searching through the throngs of people when a familiar call hit him. A call that had the animal inside of him jerking his head and finding Shirou right away. Gray eyes locking on his and the warmth that filled him at the smile. Approaching the heavyweight, he reached out and pulled the canine into his arms, uncaring how it would look to others. He didn’t care, not with Shirou at his side, he wouldn’t fuck up the way his brother did. He wasn’t ashamed of what he felt for the wolf.

“Come on, you must be tired,” he caught the nod before the male could stop himself, eyes watching the movement as Shirou licked his lips, wanting to trace the male’s lips with his fingers, “Shirou.” The color to pale cheeks and the hand that curled around his. Breathing deeply, catching his boyfriend’s scent and held back the shudder as the jaguar in him caught the heady and delicious pheromones. A hint of something unknown, looking around to make sure that no one else caught and with a sound under his breath, he gave anyone who even dared to look at Shirou a glare.

Stepping through the door of their apartment, neither could help the feeling of frustration. Shirou’s confusion and him, wanting to mark the heavyweight as his own. Cover the male in his scent. Forcing tighter control on his body, his wants could wait until Shirou was ready. Leading Shirou further into the apartment, he hadn’t been staying in the apartment very long, but with the hopes of what he wanted, the two of them could make this place home.

“There’s a room if you’d like to sleep by yourself. Unless, of course, you’d like to, uh, sleep in my room. With me, I mean.” he felt himself heating up, flushing like a school boy before mentally berating himself. Didn’t Shirou tell him that they should take things slow? Looking away, he didn’t see the hand come up and turn his head.

“Hidekuni-kun, you don’t I’m a-”

He saw the pain in his lover’s eyes, the damage that Yonekuni did with his words and rested his forehead against Shirou’s. ”Don’t think that! Didn’t I tell you that you’re not? You’re far from that, almost pure to me. You’re nothing like that Shirou! Yonekuni was angry at what he lost and took out his mistakes on you. You’ve given Oushou a memory that he’ll never forget and me, you’ve given me a chance to dream of a future with you.” Pulling the canine into his arms, burying his nose against Shirou’s neck, breathing in the intoxicating scent. ”You’re nothing like that and I would give anything to make you happy.” His lips against skin, parting and tasting before trailing up the male’s jaw line to his lips. ”Let me show you.” Trailing his lips once again, pulling back to see the smile on Shirou’s lips.

~

‘Time likes to fly by when you’re having fun,’ he thought to himself as he finished up for the day. The interview he went in for started out a little rough, he couldn’t help but be nervous. But once he managed to calm his nerves down, it continued more professionally. He had gotten the job he applied for, though not int he department he thought he’d get, but translating the manga that the company had started to license. He didn’t mind it, it was work, but he was waiting for an opening in the literature department. Shutting down his computer, he glanced out the window to see the over cast sky and couldn’t help but wish for snow. That would make a perfect Christmas for them, though they wouldn’t be spending it at home, but leaving for the holidays to visit his parents back in Japan. Back to see Hidekuni’s parents for a bit.

Locking up his desk before bidding his boss a good day before leaving for the weekend and the holiday, he bit his lip and tried to hold back the smile at what he had planned. Wanting to treat the nekomata with something that they’ve both been wanting and waiting for. Nodding to his fellow coworkers, he pulled his jacket close to his body as he left the warm building. Bypassing the the taxies that were slowly looking for customers, down the street before the hotel came into view. He had made a reservation for Hidekuni and himself, a gift for both the blond and for himself, though Hidekuni didn’t know about it just yet. Through the door that the bellman held open for him, a nod of thanks before he approached the desk.

“Excuse me, I have a reservation.” He smiled to the employee and gave him his name then his credit card, taking the card back and the key once he was fully checked in. Following the directions that were given to him, he fingered the cellphone in his pocket as he approached the elevator. Stepping inside the empty device, he pulled out his phone and called the phone number that he knew by heart.

“Hidekuni?” It still felt a little weird to drop the honorific from his lover’s name, but when the blond requested it, he couldn’t deny what the younger male wanted. ”I’ve-uh, got something for you,” he started, suddenly feeling shy though he was alone, “you’ve still got classes, right?” The smooth voice of the younger male sent shivers down his spine, as if the blond were with him, behind him. As if the blond had ducked his head down to whisper in his ear. ”We’ll, when you’re done, come to room fourteen zero eight in a few hours. I’ll be waiting for you.” He held back the chuckle at the curse Hidekuni gave, knowing that he still had two classes. Ending the call, he looked around before making sure that know one had over heard in him the hallway. The bag he carried, once shouldered, now dropped to the floor with a thump once he slid the key into the door and unlocking it. Collecting his bag once more, closing the door behind him before toeing off his shoes and setting them to the side. What light that seemed to fliter through the clouds in the sky darkened more now that snow had slowly started to fall.

Turning away form the window, he set his bag on the bed and opened it. A change of clothes for both himself and Hidekuni, catching sight of what else he had packed. A brand new bottle of lubrication. The day before, he worked up the courage to enter the sex shop several of his coworkers had talked about, not that he joined in, though. It was something he overheard. Had eyed shelves of toys and lubricants, movies as well as clothing that was meant to spice up one’s sex life. Blushing to himself, he closed the curtains before turning on the lamp to light up the darkened room.

His body stirring, wanting the heated touches that the blond gave him. The looks he was sure Hidekuni was trying to hide, the want and desire that he could feel on his skin when the nekomata looked at him. The knock on the door startled him, almost making him jump. A hand to his chest, calming his racing heart. It couldn’t be the heavyweight, the younger male still had two classes. But a look into the small peep hole of the door, he quickly unlocked the door and opened it wide enough for the jaguar to come in. Cheeks red from the cold, hair wind blown and jacked hanging open, as if Hidekuni had quickly shrugged it on and never bothered to zip up. His boyfriend was out of breath as he stepped further into the hotel room, dropping his book bag and toeing off his shoes, setting them right next to Shirou’s.

“Hidekuni? I-I though you still had classes…” Down cast eyes, cheeks darkening before the smile, the same one that sent both shivers and his stomach aflutter.

“I couldn’t wait and all my classes have been pretty much the same.” Reaching up and helping the cat slip out of his jacket, finally noticing the bag in his hand. ”Err, I thought you might be hungry.” Taking the bag from Hidekuni, setting it on the small table off to the side of the bed before returning to finish removing the jacket.

Leaning in, catching the scent Hidekuni gave off. One that reminded him of forests long past, of the animal that he was and that Hidekuni was as well. The murmuring of his name, rubbing his nose along the length of a strong neck. ”I thought about you, Hidekuni. About your hands,” reaching and holding, curling his fingers around Hidekuni’s, “of how they’d touch me. Of you inside me,” his words trailed off when he pulled back to look up into slitted blue eyes, “deep inside me-” Words cut off when the hands pulled away and pushed at him, forcing him down onto the bed. The passion and fire in the nekomata’s eyes, feeling his soul respond to the call.

“You’re mine, Shirou.” The animalistic growl, full of possessiveness and love, a feeling he responded to in kind. A dip in the bed, the body above him as the blond knelt then straddled his chest. Shirt quickly unbuttoned and tossed aside while his own hands slid up to rub at the jean clad thighs, slowly moving upward and inwards to palm at the straining cloth. Catching blue eyes staring down at him, making sure that the nekomata was watching him, he slipped the button free and grabbed the tab of the zipper , slowly lowering it. A brief flash of white, pulling at the flaps of Hidekuni’s pants before slipping a hand inside to find what he had been dreaming of.

Pulling at the slightly damp underwear, only imagining the fluid that had started building on the tip of the jaguar’s cock. Waist band of Hidekuni’s underwear was yanked down, larger hands scrambling to pull the hot and heavy flesh out. Moving forward, Hidekuni leaned towards him. Parting his lips, tongue licking at the bulbous head of the blond’s cock, fingertips pulling down and moving along the hard flesh that lay before him.

Feeling his body trembling, eyes riveted on the sight of Shirou’s lips wrapped around him. Sucking at the head of his flesh, as if it were the finest treat in the world. His hands betrayed his wish, trembling slightly as he reached down, brushing away at the dark bangs, getting a better view of gray eyes. Watching them narrow at him, he bit his lip when a hot hand reached up to cup his taunt balls, soft hands cradling his sack while the gentle suction continued. Shirou’s free hand slipped up, wrapping around his length, moving in time with his head. The sudden feel of cool air hitting his wet skin, a hiss of his breath slipped out from his lips while his lover whispered words he only heard in his fantasies.

Cradling the back of Shirou’s head, his hand joined the canine’s, moving rapidly over his cock. The shuddering of his body, trying to tell the one below him but the smile and the words “come”. A cry of the heavyweight’s name as he came, spilling over on both his hand and Shirou’s face. Watching through blurry eyes, unable to hear anything but his labored breathing and the heavy thud of his heart as it raced in his chest.

The pink tongue slipping out, catching his seed that landed on wet and swollen lips. Hand taken away and cleaned of his cum, the lazy smile that graced the wolf’s face, though he he couldn’t help holding back the snort of laughter. ”Wow,” he licked his lips, leaning down to kiss Shirou’s lips before pulling back. ”I didn’t know you had this in you, Shirou. But I’ve dreamed,” he pulled back and got off the male’s body, “dreamed of you, covered in my scent. Marked by me. Mine.” He reached out and helped Shirou to his feet, clothing that the male wore was nothing but a hindrance for him, helping the wolf shed his clothing. Delighting in the expanse of skin with every piece of clothing that was removed, he soon reached up to rub in the drying cum. Keeping his gaze on Shirou’s face, the flush to cheeks and the heady scent that the male unknowingly released.

Once he was sure that his cum was gone, fully rubbed into Shirou’s skin, he took his lover’s lips in a quick and yet, possessive kiss. ”Mine.” It was Shirou who spoke this time, grabbing his hand and leading him into the bathroom. Mine to love and keep for myself.”

L-love? Shirou loved him? Feeling as if his chest would burst, the one he loved loved him back. Rushing quick as he could, shucking his pants off, careful of his sensitive flesh before pulling the canine into the curve of his body. Not caring if Shirou had bathed or not, pulling Shirou into the shower, water turned on before pushing his lover against the wall. Ducking his head, lips claiming any part of Shirou he could reach, anxious to sin himself deep into his lover’s body.

Dragging his lips down and away, muttering into the side of the wolf’s neck. ”I still can’t believe it. I’ve wanted and waited for so long, Shirou-”

The finger against his lips, half lidded eyes watched him. The warm and welcome smile gracing Swollen lips, words that turned his world upside down. ”Hidekuni, you’ve helped me heal. Made me feel as if I’m the only one in the world. I-” A swallow, he knew how hard this was on Shirou. After the pain of the past five years, he understood so much. ”I love you. Love you so much that I-” He didn’t let the canine finish, sinking down onto his knees and pulled Shirou down with him. He would do what ever it took to keep Shirou happy, to build a future together. Under the spray of water that was ignored, letting his hands roaming across Shirou’s body. Finger’s mapping and exploring, dipping and pressing inside to feel the tight clench of Shirou’s body. Imagining how it would feel once he pushed himself inside.

Slowly washing each other, Hidekuni couldn’t get over how Shirou looked with his head tossed back, groaning out his name while trying to catch his breath. His hand slipped up Shirou’s body, turning the dark head to kiss away the cry as he pushed a finger inside, the sight of Shirou coming because of him, the jaguar inside him purred at the sight. Pride and ego growing at the knowledge of Shirou getting off, enjoying him. Ignoring the throbbing of his body, wanting Shirou to enjoy to this more so than he, shutting off the water. Wrapping a soft towel and drying the canine off, holding back a sound at the whimper that the wolf gave, handing him a robe before drying himself off. Making sure that he had Shirou’s attention, he stroked his fingers up and down his body, teasing the both of them before he dried himself off and donned the second robe.

It was the feel of a foot against his, the both of them sitting at the small table to the side of the bed. Eating the food he brought, he could feel the tension building, seeing a hint of a pale nipple that seemed to hide behind the robe that Shirou wore. Watching as the male pushed back his chair, forgetting about what he was doing, just setting aside his utensil while Shirou shrugged out of the robe. Leaving the food half eaten, he followed behind, shucking off the robe he wore. Kneeling on the bed, almost as if the male was presenting himself, offering up what his body had to offer. Sliding a hand up Shirou’s back, gently forcing the wolf’s chest to the bed, trailing his lips down the opposite path of his hand. Kissing each vertebra while his hands raised Shirou’s ass to the exact position that he wanted.

The breathy sounds of his name, holding firmly on hips while spreading cheeks and blowing warm air against the small hole, watching it twitch. He wondered briefly how a such a small hole could stretch around him and if it really could. He wanted to find out, wanted it right now. Wanted so much as it beckoned him to do more, inviting him. Running his nose along the cleft, the musky, raw scent that called to his soul had him dipping his fingertips in. Sliding one finger in slowly, his tongue joining in to wriggle around the edges. A slow pump of his hand, pulling back to barely catch Shirou looking over his shoulder at him. Slipping in a second finger, eyes glued to the way Shirou’s body swallowed his digit, wondering how his lover’s body would look stretched around him. Nipping at pale cheeks that pushed back against him and unable to wait any lover, he pulled his fingers free to force Shirou on his back.

Pushing legs apart and settling in, leaning to rest the palms of his hands just above Shirou’s shoulders, he turned into the hand that cupped his cheek. Pressing a soft kiss while he let part of his soul slip free. Watching the expression on Shirou’s face, gray eyes clouded with love and passion. ”love you, Shirou.” Ducking down to lick at the male’s chin and down to the underside. hands that trembled, reaching for the lubrication only to have Shirou beat him to it. The shy grin, Shirou scooting back against the pillows and headboard. Swallowing hard as Shirou pulled his legs, up, the click of a cap opening and eyes trained as they trailed their way down.

“I’ve imagined you, Hidekuni,” a murmur, looking up from the fingers that were slick with lube as they circled the small, puckered hole. ”Touching me like this, holding me and,” his groan joined Shirou’s as a single finger pushed inside, “taking me. Love me Hidekuni, the way the animal inside tells you.”

It would be later that he thought of the way Shirou’s fingers dug into his shoulders as he clung to him. The suck on his lower lip as he moved and the sounds of his name being cried out as Shirou cried. Unable to take it anymore, burying his nose against Shirou’s neck to muffle his cries.

His finger traced the edge of Shirou’s furred ears, the slow breathing never changed when he pulled himself closer, wrapping his arms around Shirou’s chest. ”I don’t want you to go back,” he confessed softly into the pale hair, “Yonekuni would do whatever it takes to get you to go back to him. I’m scared, Shirou. I love you so much that I can’t stand the though of my brother trying to get you back.” He breathed deeply in Shirou’s scent. Closing his eyes, hoping the fear that he was feeling was nothing more than just insecurities. He didn’t see gray eyes open, nor did he hear the faint whisper of his name.

~

He was lucky enough that his father decided to have dinner at the restaurant while he stayed for the holidays, working to help since he was forced to leave the club once word had gotten out that he got a customer pregnant. Which was just as well, he lost the interest he needed for the job since that night Shirou kicked him out.

Shirou.

Just the thought of the male sent a feeling rushing through him. Pain that pierced his heart at the thought of the wolf laying with another, but he had a chance now. He couldn’t help that he over heard things he wasn’t meant to hear. Overhearing the words that his father had told Karen, who looked delighted to have more at her Christmas party. He avoided telling her about Shirou and the situation that happened, only coming clean when she heard Noririn reaming Kunimasa out for his treatment of both Hidekuni and Shirou. His ears had rung for a week at her lecture, voice high and expression stern. Not even the prospective thought of another grandchild did anything to improve her mood.

But when he heard the words “coming home” he couldn’t help his mood looking up. He didn’t care that David had asked how serious Hidekuni was, though they shot him a look and a shake of their heads. ’It doesn’t matter what they think,’ Yonekuni thought to himself, ‘I’ll get him back.’ Finishing his shift, he changed out of his uniform with the date in mind of when the two should arrive.

He regretted calling Shirou a whore, knew that the male was far from that. Anger always made him say the wrong things, screwing and fucking things up to the point that there was only a thin chance that he’d be able to fix things. He tried many times to get a hold of Shirou before he left. Calling, leaving messages on his phone and each one ignored. No response to “call him back”. He tried to visit the male at his school, only to realize how late it was, no students around and those that lingered on campus informed him of the graduation that had just finished. Of which he hadn’t been invited to. He wanted to ask how this all happened. But he knew. That it was all his fault for not realizing his feelings sooner.

It happened one night, just a few weeks after Shirou had left. Stopping by the apartment with the hopes that Shirou hadn’t left already, he was never told when Shirou was leaving and with the hopes that he could catch the male. The sight of the unknown male that blocked the door, glaring at him before the middleweight showed up, his mood darkening.

“What do you want, Madarame?”

“Shirou. Is he home?” He couldn’t stand that shit eating grin that spread across Oushou’s face. The smirk that said he knew everything. The sigh before the snake turned to the unknown male and spoke quietly. He managed to catch a few words before the male walked back into the apartment.

“Really, if Shirou hadn’t told you anything on where he is, why should I tell you?” His hands curled into fists at his side, struggling to come up with a reason.

“Look, why do you want to know? From your past treatment of Shirou, you haven’t exactly treated him right, you know? Cheating on him and then calling him a whore? That’s-that’s just really sad, Madarame.” A shake of a dark head as Shirou’s childhood friend stepped back. ”If you don’t know your feelings for Shirou, then you best just for-”

“I LOVE HIM, DAMMIT!” He wasn’t aware that he had shouted, the heaving of his chest as he tried to catch his breath. The intake of breath, almost holding it in, realizing what he should have figured out so long ago. ”I-I love him.”

“Yes, you love him. I-” A bite of a lip before the middleweight sighed. “Shirou left three weeks ago for London, leaving the apartment for me and my partner. I honestly don’t know when he’ll be back.” He watched the male step back further into the apartment. ”Or if he’ll even be back. You should have treated him better, Madarame.” The click of the door, leaving him alone, standing in the hallway.

The ringing of his phone pulled him from his thoughts, pausing as he pulled off his shirt before tossing it to the floor. A glance at the number, the one who ruined everything. Taking a deep breath, never knowing that this chance, his chance, would be his last.


	5. Chapter 5

The over head call of their flight number and their section, first class. A present from his father, saying that he shouldn’t be spending his money on two tickets. That he should worry about school and his relationship with Shirou, it would be an early morning, on his way to school, late because he got distracted by the dressing wolf that his father caught him. Waylaying him, shoving the tickets in his hand and with the words that it “would be an early Christmas present”, telling him that the two were expected to join the rest of the family for the holidays. Of course, he tried to protest and deny the gift. But with how stubborn the older jaguar was, there wasn’t much he could do.

And as they boarded their flight, Hidekuni couldn’t help the feel of apprehension filling him, whispering words to him. He knew that Shirou was looking forward to visiting his parents, to spend time as a family and to be introduced as Shirou’s partner. The apprehension he felt had nothing to do with the fact that he’d be introduced as Shirou’s lover but with the fact that he knew his brother would try as hard as he could to get Shirou back. Not that he was going to give Shirou up, no. He knew that his older brother must have realized what and who he lost. Gazing to his left, watching his lover settle in for the long flight, catching gray eyes and the flush that Shirou supported. He wasn’t the only one thinking about the night before.

Of coming home from the two day stay in the hotel, pulling the wolf in to his room and stripping Shirou for his own pleasure. Piece by piece, clothing fell away to reveal a pale chest that was covered in his marks. Skin that was soaked with his scent, marking that this male, this canine and one of a kind madararui, was his and his alone. He had taken great pleasure in making the wolf shiver in pleasure, having him beg for more of his touch. Exploring Shirou’s body to his heart’s content and having the male do that same. Finding out the spots that had Shirou shivering in pleasure and shaking in laughter, seeing how long Shirou could hold off on cumming and the feel of the hot body tightening around him.

And now, it seemed, it was time to go home. To see friends and family, though he was hesitant about seeing his older brothers. One who didn’t approve of him being with Shirou and the other, taking away his lover that he neglected. The feel of a warm hand on his, looking up to see the gentle smile that Shirou gave him, silently telling him that everything would b alright. He knew Shirou wouldn’t throw him away for Yonekuni. The gentle squeeze to his hand, feeling the fears that had been plaguing him for a while die down, for now.

He knew that it seemed liked his was rushing this relationship, should take his time to win Shirou over, even though the wolf said he loved him. Once they reached Tokyo, Hidekuni knew he had to come up with an excuse to go out shopping alone. The previous two weeks, he spent time looking over the shops in London and though he found a few that caught his eye, he knew he had more options in Tokyo. He didn’t confide in his parents nor in Karen, wanting to surprise Shirou. The feel of a weight against his shoulder, pulling him from his musings to see Shirou resting his head against him. Breathing even, the male had fallen asleep once the flight had reached cursing altitude. Pulling a blanket over the both of them, Hidekuni turned his attention to the window, steeling himself to what or rather, who he had to face.

~

He kept his mouth shut when he heart his father talking about his brother. He didn’t want to hear about Hidekuni’s accomplishments, didn’t want to know about how well he was doing in school and he didn’t want to know about his relationship with Shirou- He butted in on the conversation. ”What’s this about his relationship with Shirou?” He asked, setting aside his drink that the waitress had placed in front of him, more interested in what his father would say instead of the drink.

“As far as I can see, Hidekuni is serious about him, Yonekuni. I have a vague idea what he’s going to do. He’s been dropping some hints for the past few weeks, but I’m not exactly sure. He’s not saying anything.” The pause as the older reptile took a drink before setting his glass to the side, leveling a look at him. ”Yonekuni, I know you. At least, I like to think I know you well, with you being my son. You won’t give up with out a fight, but the damage you’ve done in the past months and years,” a shake of a blond head, “you’ll be lucky if he forgives you. Anyway, aren’t you with that girl,” Maximilian moved his hand in a circular motion, almost as if he was trying to jog his memory, “the girl you got pregnant-”

“About that,” he began, recalling the phone call a few days ago, the one that brought up his hopes and his thoughts on chances, “I’m-” He stopped himself when his father held up his hand, the stern look that he knew so well, the same look that Karen gave when he did something that she didn’t agree to.

“It isn’t me you need to explain, but to Fujiwara-kun. Though, Yonekuni, I’m still amazed that you actually took that girl to that restaurant. Forgetting your boyfriend’s birthday and calling him a whore?” The disappointed shake of a blond head and a heavy sigh. ”I thought you were raised better than that, Yonekuni.”

How could he defend himself? Everything his father said was true, he really screwed up and screwed himself over. The emotion he felt for the wolf, the love and after admitting it Oushou that he loved Shirou had grown, leaving a pit in his stomach when he thought about the heavyweight. Was this the same type of pain that Shirou felt? All the years of unrequited love, putting up with his infidelity, after his love was revealed. He looked away from his father’s look, shame filling him. It was true that a heavyweight having multiple partners was a common, but his family, save for his mother, never practiced such a thing, despite Karen’s furious anger at his mother. Taking Shirou’s patience for granted, relying on the promise that the canine made to him. Sighing into his drink, he didn’t see David glance at his watch, only hearing the sound of a chair being pushed back as the nekomata stood. The murmured words of “I’ll be back in a few hours”, never looking up as the older male left them alone.

“Yonekuni, you’re my son and I wish only the best for you. But be careful. Things have changed and you’ll be facing a challenge, one that’ll either make or break you. Love waits for no one, as the saying goes, so don’t be surprised if you don’t get what you want.”

~

He still thought about his father’s words as he laid back in bed, staring up at the ceiling while the blankets were thick and heavy, attempting to keep him warm at the start of winter. A pale and horrible imitation of the want he wanted to hold. With his head buried deep in his pillows, he could barely hear the noise of speaking out in the hallway, almost outside his door. As if someone decided that the perfect place to chat was right outside his door. Memories of the one summer he was closest to the wolf came back to him, of sneaking the heavyweight in his room in the middle of the night. Training and talking to the male, brief touches that had his heart racing and body yearning to push Shirou to the bed, run his hands and map his boyfriend’s body with touches. With the sound of faint speaking outside his bedroom, he slowly drifted off to sleep with the hopes that everything would work out in his favor.

In his dreams, it seemed as if everything was perfect. No awkwardness between them, quiet the opposite. It was as if this was the way his life should have been if he hadn’t screwed up so badly. Shirou would be waiting for him, quietly and strong. Hand offered to him while a smile on his face and eyes that held a welcoming heat, as if the canine couldn’t wait to get him alone. To show him how much he was wanted. Dreams of a child he could have, one that would look like him and yet, have Shirou’s form. Dreams that plagued him for weeks on end, torment him with what he lost. He wanted Shirou to hold a small bundle. To watch a pup squirm and wriggle as he grew, struggling to get on his feet and be playful that he knew a wolf pup could be. The love Shirou had for him would be enough to overcome the problems they had.

In his sleep, buried under his blankets, he whispered the heavyweight’s name.

Later, at a time that he didn’t have, he should really keep a clock in his room, he awoke. Though he wasn’t sure what awoke him from his sleep, but his body damp with both sweat and other fluids, something he hadn’t done since he was younger. It could have been the stickiness or maybe it could have been the brief knock he thought he heart earlier, rapping once and then, twice, that awoken him. Shoving off the blankets, grimacing at his soaked boxers, shaking his head for cumming in his sleep. Peeling back the edge of his soaked boxers, looking down with regret. If Shirou were here, he wouldn’t have a problem like this. Sighing with regret, pushing himself to move and head to the small shower that he was lucky enough to have connected to his room.

Shedding his ruined clothes, and a press of a button for the right temperature for the shower, he ducked his head under the hot spray of water and closed his eyes. He wasn’t jealousy of his younger brother, Kunimasa, and his growing family. But he knew that that was just a lie to told himself and told the world. He was jealous of the happiness his brother had. The loving attention that Norio had for his brother, adored his nephew though he wouldn’t play with him the way Noririn expected him to. But the dream of Shirou holding a pup, one that haunted him. Making him longing for more, of a future that he wanted. Washing away the evidence of the night before, he wondered when his brother would show up and if Shirou would arrive with him or if the heavyweight decided to stay in London. And if Shirou did come, would he show up at the Christmas party that Karen had planed out.

By the time he finished, hints of cold water had started to filter through the hot water. A fumbling hand reached, shutting off the water before grabbing a towel. Drying off his face with the warm, dry towel, he barely spared a glance at his soiled boxers, grabbing them and tossing the clothing into the hamper. By the time he got his body dried and bed made, he could smell the breakfast that was being made down the hall. Dressed warmly, he left the safety of his room and down the hallway, bypassing the workers that started early. Following the smell of both tea and strong coffee, he paused in the doorway. Eyes narrowing at the younger blond that occupied a seat at the large table, catching the scent that he thought he’d never smell again. As approached the table, the tension that started to build.

Blue eyes met blue eyes, pulling himself to his full height, glaring down at the nekomata. He waited for the jaguar to look away, to admit defeat but the only thing his younger brother gave him was a smug smile. It was the sound behind him that broke the tension in the room.

“Move, Yonekuni,” Kunimasa’s voice came from over his shoulder, the grumpy expression made up for the frustration he felt, “taking all the hot water.” The shake of a dark head, the small jaguar cub in his arms blinked sleepily from his brother’s arms. Taking the few steps to the table, his gaze returned and never left Hidekuni’s face, dropping into the chair that he pulled out. Finally, he broke his gaze away from Hidekuni’s when the younger male turned his attention to Norio, chatting with the younger nekomata. Letting the two talk, his eyes caught the faint bruising on the side of the younger male’s neck. The clenching in his chest, only imagining who gave his brother such a mark.

“Where’s Shirou?”

Those that had been moving about in the kitchen, working, froze at his words, rude and interruptive. He didn’t care for the twin like spots on his younger brother’s cheeks.

“Shirou? He’s, uh-,” the stuttering, watching Hidekuni’s cheeks darken even more. A look that didn’t fit the higher madararui. ”He’s a bit tired. Jet lag and all. I’m sure you understand.”

Oh, he under stood all right. The underlining meaning was perfectly clear to him. As soon as the others continued what they were doing or talking about, the noise level returning to normal, he leaned in while his hand curled around the edge of the table. Fingers attempting to damage while he tried to control his temper. ”It’s not jet lag,” he hissed, his voice low, “you fucked him. That’s why he’s not here!”

The air between them cooled even more as the large cat narrowed his eyes at him, fingers releasing the edge of the table only to curl into fists in his lap, as if he was getting reach to throw the first punch.

“I don’t see how it’s any of your business, brother. If I did, indeed, fuck him as you call it, I’m not about to tell you.” The warning like look on the younger male’s face went unnoticed. ”I’m not like you, flaunting my conquests. Which Shirou is not.” The sound of the legs of the chair scrapping the floor as it was pushed back, Hidekuni standing. ”You best stay away from Shirou. You lost and he’s mine now, I won’t give him up, not even for you.” The shit eating, smug like grin tore something inside him. ”Even if you miss him or love him,” the grin was gone, replaced by a possessive look that entered his brother’s eyes, not unlike his.

“He’s mine. And I’ll be damned if you think that you can waltz back in to Shirou’s life and try to take him back. If you even try, I’ll fight you for him.” A normally friendly lips curled into a snarl, hints of sharp teeth and he knew, knew from his memories past of the warnings Hidekuni gave him five years ago. The promise that Hidekuni made to fight Kunimasa as a male over Noririn and now, the promise of the jaguar fighting him to keep him away from Shirou. Such a promise couldn’t be taken so lightly. Turning and watching the nekomata leave, it was then that he became aware of the scene he caused. The awkward silence and the cough that Kunimasa gave.

“I thought Hidekuni wasn’t serious about Fujiwara-”

Palms of his hands made contact with the table as he slammed his hands down, startling everyone that stopped to watch and listen.

“You knew? You knew Hidekuni was interested in Shirou and you didn’t even bother to mention this to me?” His voice low, almost on the edge of hisses, starling the jaguar cub in his brother’s arms. Barely paying attention to Karen taking her grandson from Kunimasa, shooting the both of them a look.

“This is the reason I didn’t tell you,” the younger male grumbled, eyeing him with distaste, “you’d react like that. To the news that someone, our brother, would be interested in Fujiwara? It was bound to happen. You think that other than yourself, no one would be interested in him?” He dropped into his seat, he hadn’t thought that others would be really drawn to the wolf. Shifting under the dirty glare that Karen gave him as she handed her grandson back to Kunimasa.

“You screwed up, Yonekuni, you can’t be made at Hidekuni-kun for moving in and taking Fujiwara-kun away-” Ahh, the reasoning sound of his older brother, Shinobu.

“Why are you all on his side anyway? Shouldn’t you be on mine?” He demanded, not waiting for an answer as he pushed back his chair before stalking out of the family kitchen and back down the hallway that would lead him to the room that Hidekuni always occupied when he visited. And now, it seems, where Shirou was staying. Swallowing heavily, he made his way slowly down the hall, stopping when he heard the murmuring of voices. The faint sounds of laughter before he spun on his heel and headed back to his bedroom. He couldn’t believe it. Wouldn’t and refused to believe that Shirou was fucking his brother. He just had to be patient and try to win the heavyweight canine back.

~

He held his breath, hearing the footsteps outside the bedroom door before releasing his breath, feeling foolish. It wasn’t any of Yonekuni’s business if Shirou was there and of course, the heavyweight wasn’t there, having been dropped off at his parents home after being picked up at the airport. The wolf’s explanation of the atmosphere and the people they knew, would most likely be “uncomfortable” and awkward. And as if Shirou could predict such things, he was right. So he shared his bed alone, wanting his lover close by. But, a deep breath, some time apart would do some good. Shirou could visit his parents and he, well, he had some plans in the form of shopping to do.

A quick shower, the hot water gone and with nothing but cold, he snarled under his breath at Yonekuni’s arrogance before he finished and tried to dress as fast as he could. Pulling his clothing on, layering it enough to keep him warm before he straightened his bed, unable to stop himself imagining Shirou in the bed with him. A sigh that didn’t make a sound, he couldn’t think that way and forced himself to leave the room, only to stumble and nearly trip over the waiting blond. The glower he knew his older brother was supporting, hidden under several layers of both thick sweaters and a heavy jacket, wouldn’t scare him like his brother thought it would.

“I was informed that Shirou isn’t here, but with his parents.” A deep voice that sounded like it was tinged with remorse, sounded like the usual smugness that Yonekuni was famous for, despite the look the male wore. ”You’re up to something and I want to find out what. What do you have to gain by being with Shirou?”

Holding his tongue, refusing to rise to the bait or at least, that’s what he told himself as he slowly counted backwards from ten, shaking his head in the process. Patting his pocket to make sure he had his wallet on him, he would need it, he was sure. ”Why are you asking me this? What- no,” his voice lowering as he stared into blue eyes, just like his, “no, let me ask you this. Why are you so desperate to get Shirou back? It’s not like you love him, so why? Or did you suddenly came to the realization of what you lost?” Silence, awkward and stifling, almost suffocating, was his answer before he pushed past Yonekuni and back the way he came just over an hour ago. Quiet shuffling, though he knew the reptile wouldn’t shuffle, but maybe walk tall or even strut. Holding back a snort of amusement, he handed a small envelope to Karen, giving her a small nod. She knew what he had planned, his conspirator and almost, as if, partner in crime. Of course, his parents had an idea. At least, he thought they did, he dropped hints but didn’t confide in his mother, lest his mother confided in his father, which would lead to the whole thing being ruined.

“Everything will be set up for you, Hidekuni-kun,” the slight husky voice of the older nekomata, a smile twitching at her dark lips, “it’ll be perfect for you. Just the way you instructed.” A murmured thanks, nodding to Inukai, who would give them a ride into Tokyo. He was lucky enough that the older dog had errands to run while in the city and agreed to give him a ride.

It was later after they set off, the grumbling to his left. The two in the front seat seemed fidget a little at the sound, neither wanted to get on the bad side of the blond, who had invited himself along for the ride. Most likely to follow him and find out what he was up to. After being stuck in the holiday traffic for over a good hour, Hidekuni gave a sigh of relief when Inukai pulled up to their destination.

“Meet me back here at five tonight, okay?” He gave the two brothers a smile, a strained smile, but one none the less as he explained his plans. The echo of two doors closing, one softly and the other, a hard slam while the older male and his son drove off, leaving them alone on the cold, crowded street. Tugging on his jacket, pulling it closer all the while peeking at his brother, who looked cold despite the layers upon layers of clothes. When the older reptile caught him staring, he turned his attention up the sky. Dark and overcast with clouds, overshadowed by the sky scrapers, a gloved hand on his shoulder, pulling him from staring up at the sky and to the person at his side.

He didn’t wait for a word from his brother, jerking his shoulder from Yonekuni’s grasp, heading towards first store of many. While Shirou had been asleep during the long flight from London to Tokyo, pausing when they had to make their connection, he searched and found the address for the Ginza shopping district. He was lucky enough that Inukai knew exactly where he wanted to go and agreed ahead of time, though he knew the middleweight dog didn’t appreciate being woken up. He didn’t have to look over his shoulder to know that Yonekuni was following him.

As if the crowd that walked the street, composed of many people, parted for him, he made it to the first store with little problem. Nodding at the greeting as he entered the upscale jewelry story, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it on his arm and out of the corner of his eye, he caught the same movement of his older brother. Yonekuni only slipped off the heaviest of jackets, glancing around the room distrustfully, a sneer on the verge of his lips.

“What can I do for you,” a worker paused her words, glancing over him and his brother, “fine gentlemen?” The purr was evident in her voice and if she were madararui, pheromones would be thickening in the room. Darting a look at his brother before leaning in to whisper his request as so Yonekuni wouldn’t hear what he actually wanted. The woman opened her mouth before closing and pursing her lips, her demeanor changing to that of a professional as a prospective client, one that was willing to pay whatever it took, wanted to look at what the store offered. A quick nod before she straightened her body.

“Right this way, sir.” He followed, not caring if his older brother followed or if he stayed in the main room of the jewelry store. The display cases in the back were that of higher quality, more extravagant then what was shown up front. He waved off her offer to pull out the jewelry pillow, knowing that the right one would catch his eye and then, only then, would he want the pillow pulled out.

For the next hour, he narrowed it down to several items, but since this was one of many stores he planned to visit, he told the woman he would be back when he was ready to make his decision. The displeasure was evident, but when he gave her his family name, the calculating look entered her dark eyes and the smile that spread across her face. He didn’t like having to use his family name to get what he wanted, but this was for his lover. And since he was paying with his own money, he didn’t mind using his name. At least, not this time. Slipping his jacket back on, stepping outside in the early afternoon, bitterly cold and the rush of winter wind and as much as he didn’t want to, he waited patiently for his older brother. Grumbling aside, he continued on to the next store, refusing to answer the blunt questions that Yonekuni asked.

Stopping for lunch, finally taking in how miserable his brother looked and for one, brief moment, he felt sorry for him. But that was it, though. He wasn’t about to give Shirou up for someone who wouldn’t treat him right. As they ate quietly, he thought over of how he wanted to approach Shirou, how he was going to ask him the one question that had been on the tip of his tongue. He still had a few days until Karen’s Christmas party, had planned with the older nekomata, but even with all that, he still planned on pulling the heavyweight to the side and ask him. Ask Shirou what he had been thinking since they first got together.

“Why did you do it?” He asked the question that had been bugging him for so long, since the Christmas party that he started getting closer to Shirou. ”Why did you treat Shirou to five years of emotional torture?” Leveling a look at his older brother, watching the heavyweight crocodile school his features to hold back anything that would give him away. The click of the blond’s eating utensils being set aside.

“I honestly don’t know. Shirou promised me back in school that he’d wait for me, but-”

“Don’t you dare place the blame on Shirou!” He growled out, his voice low while his fingers tightened his chopsticks, uncaring at the sound of the wood cracking under the pressure of his grip. ”Don’t you dare! You’ve done so much to hurt him that I don’t know why you bother trying to get him back.” Pushing back his chair, pulling out his wallet to toss out his share for lunch. ”I won’t give him up without a fight, you’ll only come out as the loser.” Grabbing his jacket, he paused and narrowed his eyes. ”You should give Shirou more credit. Even if you show any type of remorse about Cheating on Shirou and calling him a whore, do you think he’d ever forgive you for that?” About to turn away, he gave his brother one last look and spoke. ”Do you even know how heart broken he was, shattered really, that you called him a whore? You don’t, do you? Because if you did, then you would know how long it took him to get over your accusing words.” He left it at that, weaving his way silently between the tables and booths. The fear he felt for the past few days seemed to grow ten fold and though he knew Shirou loved him, a small part of his mind whispered that Shirou may leave him. Throw him away for his first love.

After walking so far, he paused and looked over his shoulder, intent on making sure that his brother hadn’t followed him. Once he was positive that the older blond hadn’t followed him, he continued on his way through the shopping district, knowing that there was more shops than he could count. He liked the rings he saw at the first shop, the rare gems that would match Shirou’s natural coloring. But he wanted to make sure that he got the right ring. To make sure he wouldn’t screw this up. He only had one shot at asking the wolf.

~

Swallowing back the sound of surprise, Yonekuni hid, no, he didn’t hide. He shouldn’t have to hide. No, he suppressed his soul while blending in with the shoppers that converged on the sidewalk. Keen on knowing what Hidekuni was shopping for, he stuck close as he could without be caught, and while it was cold, he didn’t dare try to enter the jewelry stores that his younger brother entered. But as the minutes passed and then an hour, shop to shop, he roused himself to move, losing sight of his nekomata of a brother. A glance at his watch before he turned away from the way he saw his brother leave, returning back to where Inukai promised to meet them at five. The sight of the var slowly pulling up, he couldn’t help feel relief. Opening the door and nodding his thanks to the older male, he took a seat in the front, determined to take advantage of the heaters that were running on full blast, most likely for him.

He didn’t have to wait long in the car, Inukai’s son showed up and got into the back, setting aside the bags before buckling in. He paid no attention, thinking of nothing but getting warm. When he felt the car pull away from the curb and the honking horns, he finally realized that one person was missing. Turning around in his seat, looking at the sidewalk and hoping to see the running figure of his younger brother, wanting nothing more than to gloat and be smug at the nekomata being late.

“If you’re looking for Hidekuni-kun, he called me up earlier to say that he was going to stay in the city for another day or so before heading back.”

Glove covered fingers curled on his lap, looking down at the floor, the wretched feeling in his stomach that had started during the “conversation” that he and Hidekuni had, was back. Tighter than before. ”Inukai, tell me, what does Hidekuni have planned?” He didn’t look at the male, moving his gaze from the floor to the road. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught the tightening of fingers on the black steering wheel and the swallow the older male made.

“I only know a few things, but you know I can’t tell you, Yonekuni-kun.”Catching the look that the middleweight dog gave him, he opened his mouth and closed it before taking a deep breath about to ask when Inukai when he spoke up. ”If it comforts you, Yonekuni-kun, only Karen really knows. And she’s not saying a word to me or others.”

“He’s planning something, I know it,” he muttered to himself, not caring if he was over heard, “there’s no reason for a man to enter a jewelry store if he didn’t have something planned.”

“Jewelry store?” The question repeated, he nodded his head in irritation.

“Yeah, he was, no, he went to several stores, looking at the cases very intently. Talking quietly. Looking at the rings-” His words froze in his throat. That was it. That was what the jaguar was planning. ”No.. NO!” It couldn’t be that! It couldn’t! The hammering in his chest, his heart racing as his mind supplied him with images of his brother and the one he loved. He had to stop the heavyweight, stop him from asking. And as if the older male could read his mind, Inukai spoke up.

“Any news of the baby, Yonekuni-kun? How’s the mother?”

Head jerking up, he forgot about the woman and the child she carried. It was her fault that he was caught and the fact that he lost the wolf. Deep down, he knew it was his fault. But it made it easier to blame her, to force the guilt onto her and away from him. Making it easier for him to get through the day without the guilt of knowing it was him who pushed Shirou away. He kept his gaze away, turning from the windshield to the car door window while he answered. ”No, there’s no news about her or the baby. Though, I’ve heard that she’s seeing a former coworker of mine.” His voice was calm and expression blank. ”Not that I don’t mind. Couldn’t really care. I want to tell Shirou, but since he isn’t staying at the restaurant, I haven’t had a chance to tell him.” He let his words drift off, he had confided more today than he ever had.

“If it’s any consolation, Yonekuni-kun, there is a chance that he may be there this Friday and Saturday.” This weekend? The party that Karen was throwing? About to open his mouth, the look that the older dog sent him and the tone had him stopping. ”I’ve said too much, Karen doesn’t know that I know,” Inukai ducked his head, cheeks heating up in shame, “I over heard her talking to Shinobu-kun, and pretty much put two and two together. That’s pretty much all I know, so Yonekuni-kun, use this one opportunity to do and say what you need to do.”

Taking the words to heart, he nodded and planned, hiding the grin that slowly started to curl at his lips. He would use this little bit of information that Inukai let slip, steal away what was rightfully his.

~

The sound of a chime from the antique clock on the wall in the front of the shop, reminded him how late it was. He had returned to the first shop that he had visited earlier, after checking other jewelry stores, nothing he had saw there had caught his eye. When he had stepped through the door of the jewelry shop for the second time, the greeting the woman gave when from being polite and courteous to that of warmth of a prospective client. Someone willing to pay high price for something he truly wants. Though he hadn’t walked away from the other jewelry stores empty handed, their gifts lay in his pocket, secured and ready for him to give to Shirou’s parents. Thoughts of what he bought for Shirou’s adopted parents were pushed away, as he looked over the glass case and the pillow rings that the woman had pulled out. He couldn’t decide on the right ring. It couldn’t look gaudy nor too flash and he couldn’t help the feeling that if anyone he knew were to see him fret over rings, he knew they’d laugh at him.

Frustration slowly built up inside of him, biting down on his tongue as he went from one ring to another before he caught sight of the one that would be perfect. It had the same coloring of the other rings that, sitting to the side and away from more of the flashiest of rings, almost as if it had been pushed into the corner on purpose.

“Excuse me,” he caught the woman’s attention, unable to suppress the smile as the woman pulled out the ring he was indicating to. Away from the glass and into the light, it was what, almost exactly what he was looking for. A gold band with three small jewels, setting into a small triangle. Each jewel a different color and each one that would complement Shirou. His smile dimmed a little, trying to calm the elation he felt. Was he moving too quickly? Rushing ahead in fear that his brother would try to force his way between them, trying to get back into Shirou’s good graces. He could picture his brother trying to prey on the male’s good nature. He new his answer the minute he thought about the question.

“I’ll take it.” He said softly to the employee, unable to ignore the greed that rose in her eyes. Just as she opened to mouth to give him the price, he flashed her a smile, a smile that he had been told could get him whatever he wanted and saw her falter. Mouth closing, the dusting on her cheeks as she cleared her throat.

“H-how,” the coloring on her cheeks darkened as she composed herself, “how would like to pay for the ring, sir?”

Wallet out, he slid his credit card from the holder and as he handed the credit card to her, he released a little of his attraction pheromones in the hopes of her lowering the price. Not even a two seconds passed before he heard the audible ”pop” as the woman’s soul slipped free. Perk ears set on top of dark hair and the wisp of a tale that waved slowly back and forth. Hiding the pleased smile as the woman apologized profusely all the while, embarrassment was easy to see. He wouldn’t have guessed that she was a cat, as his card and the ring were taken. A few minutes of silence, watching the employee work as she slipped the ring into velvet box before both his card and his purchase was handed back to him. The receipt followed and going by the blush she wore, the heated look that followed, something else as well.

Thanking her for her time, pocketing the velvet box that held the ring and stepping outside into the cold, he chanced a look over his shoulder to see her watching him from the door he had just left. Lifting his hand to give a lazy wave and a smile, he moved on towards the train, side stepping and slipping between the shoppers. Once he was blocks away from the jewelry store, he pulled out his receipt. On the back of the printed paper, the woman had scrawled out her name and number, little words below asking him to call her. Chuckling under his breath, he shredded the paper and tossing it into a trashcan as he passed by. He wasn’t interested in what she had to offer him, there was only one person who had what he wanted. The only person he actually wanted. Glancing at his watch, he picked up his pace in hopes to catch one of the last trains of the night.

Making it to the station platform just in time, luck was on his side as he slipped through the open doors, reaching for a handle right as the door closed. Only a few others occupied the car with him, each one lost in their own thoughts or reading material and, he looked more closely before turning his head, not wanting to get caught staring, sleeping. With nothing left to do but lose himself in his thoughts, the soft vibrations of his phone and the low melody, almost lulled him into a doze but instead, he pulled his phone out of his pocket. Opening up the small cell phone, seeing the text across the scream to read the words of the one he was thinking about. Smiling slightly to himself, he didn’t care how he looked to others, if they were paying him any attention, he answered and sent a reply.

He never thought that there would be someone waiting for him to get off the train. Stepping out of the warmth of the train and into the cold, December night, his senses told him that a little to the left, one of the few people waiting for the train, that Shirou was there, waiting for him. Jacket buttoned up and hands shoved into his pockets, Shirou eyed him him from where he stood. Gray eyes lit up at the sight of him and the scarf that had been wrapped around the canine’s neck was slowly unwound as he approached. In their own world, Shirou reached up for him and wrapped the warm and scented scarf around his neck. He couldn’t help inhaling the scent it carried, thick and musky, as if Shirou had rubbed himself against the cloth, marking it as his before wearing it.

While hands were busy, tucking the ends of the scarf around, he gave a quick glance around the platform to see if anyone was paying them any sort of attention. And once he was sure that no one was paying them an sore of attention, he gave in and stole Shirou’s lips in a brief kiss, teeth nibbled and once his lover’s lips parted, he swallowed the heavyweight’s sound of surprise before pulling back. Color on cheeks that had nothing to do with the cold, pride welling up in his chest at the ability to fluster Shirou.

“Come on,” Shirou urged, though his voice was hoarse, most likely from shock, “I want to introduce you to my parents tomorrow.” When he opened his mouth to say that he had already been introduced to them before, Shirou continued quickly. “I mean, as the person I’m dating. The one that I love.” He could see the color on Shirou’s cheeks darkening and like the time he followed Shirou out of the restaurant, when everything changed for them, he reached for his lover’s hand.

“Shirou,” a whisper and suddenly, he wished they were alone, at home, where he could push the male up against the wall and show him how much he loved him. With his hands and mouth, body and soul. To show Shirou how much he treasured him. He so desperately wanted to ask the wolf now. Ask the male to marry him and bond together. He found his mouth opening against his will, almost blurting out what he wanted to say when he heard the harsh laughter and the mocking tones of a group of teens, only a few years younger than himself. Crude gestures with both hands and hips as the teens walked closer.

“Hey Blondie! When you’re done with him, let me have a go. I’m sure I can show him a better time and if he likes it, which I’m sure,” a leer at Shirou at had the heavyweight’s body stiffening, lips tightening, “he’d like it, I’ll let my friends have a go at him.” The guff like laughter filled the air, drowning out the sound of traffic on the street below. He didn’t let go of Shirou’s hand and instead, he did what every male in his position should do when it comes to protecting someone important to him. Pulling Shirou beside him and then behind him, protecting his lover and mate. The cold air of the night seemed to echo the sound that started to rumble deep in his chest, a growl like warning before his soul flared. Strong and fast, leaving those that had stood and laughed at their leader’s harassment trembling in fear.

Whimpers and whines rang out from the small gang, a few stepped back while several souls popped out in submission. Two backed away in fear while he stepped forward, his tail lashing out, side to side and yet, never touched the one he protected. The minute he took a second step forward, those that could move, those that weren’t paralyzed in fear, ran off, leaving behind the one who seemed to be the ring leader in their little gang.

Pulling back his soul just as quickly as he flared it out, he curled his lip in disgust. “It looks like you’re in need of lessons on being polite in public. It’s pathetic the way you treat your fellow human beings and your betters, so badly.” He crouched down, getting into the face of the mutt who lay back, hands braced on the concrete floor. “Don’t you ever speak like that again. Especially to my lover, for if you do, I’ll show you why I’m considered a top predator to you, who is one of the lowest in ranks. Do you understand?” The trembling nod of the downed dog before tightening his grasp on Shirou’s hand. Pressure against his back, Shirou resting his head against his shoulder.

“Hope that one day, someone will forgive you for your obnoxious displays and-” He just shook his head, turned on his heel and with Shirou by his side, walked away from the train station and those that trembled at the sight of his soul.

“Hidekuni, what-” Shirou seemed to stop himself and looked down, almost as if he was gathering his thoughts. ”What were you about to say back there?” The question seemed to linger in the air, like the puffs of warm air as they breathed in the cold air.

“I was going to say that maybe they’d find someone who loves them, unconditionally.” Feeling head crawl up his cheeks. The gloved hand squeezed his, his name being whispered Shirou cleared his throat.

“My parents,” the wolf started, ducking his head as he spoke, “aren’t home tonight and since I plan to introduce you to them tomorrow, I was thinking that you could stay the night.” He didn’t have to look at Shirou, to know what the male was thinking while his nose picked up Shirou’s interest. Swallowing, he started to nod before answering, ideas and want raced through his mind.

The walk home, well, back to Shirou’s home, was made in silence. Ignoring the whispers of those who caught sight of him holding the wolf’s hand, he resisted the urge to hurry and instead, took their time. Keys slipped from Shirou’s pocket, door unlocked and he found himself unable to resist the urge to slam the door and lock it behind them. The front door didn’t get slammed, but he rushed to get his jacket off and hung up next to the canine’s, shoes toed off, he followed Shirou to his bedroom. Barely paying any attention the sparsely decorated room, pressing the canine against the bedroom door as soon as he closed it. He found himself being turned, forced back towards the small bed.

“S-Shirou?” He attempted to swallow when he felt himself fall and bounce once before coming to a rest. Gray eyes hooded, lips parted before Shirou ducked his head. A startled groan at the feel of a suck on his neck, fingers working at the buttons of his shirt, parting the fabric and revealing his chest. He caught the faint words that the male uttered against his skin, blue eyes widening as he propped himself on his elbows. Emotion radiated in his lover’s eyes, the wolf was turned on because of his declaration? For showing that he’d protect him? He wasn’t complaining. In fact, he could only handle the sounds of pleasure as Shirou settled against his legs, body bent as a nose joined a hand in rubbing him through his pants.

Through hazy eyes, he watched the hot mouth move against his cloth covered cock. The way the male slid back up his body, stopping him from thinking. Hands moving, slipping the button free on his pants and pulling the zipper tab down. Clothing being tugged down enough before Shirou knelt up, slipping his shirt off before trying to remove his pants and stood on the bed, pushing the clothing down until he could just kick the pants off. Watching as Shirou knelt back down and ducked his head.

The cry of his name as Shirou rose above him, thighs trembling in the force to hold back. Covering the hands that were braced on his chest, he met Shirou’s downward movement. Wanting nothing more than to force his lover on his back, drape a leg over his shoulder and fuck him. Sliding his hands from Shirou’s, down his chest only to run back up legs that trembled with pleasure. Catching his bottom lip with his teeth when slitted gray eyes narrowed at him, the wolf’s hot body taking him deeper. His hand moved up, curling around Shirou’s cock as it moved in time with his movements, while with his free hand, he pulled the wolf down against his chest.

Steeling lips as he pushed up, wanting to come and feel his lover come, force his seed deep into the wolf. Tightening his hand around Shirou’s flesh, thumb swiping away the rapidly dribbling pre-cum. ”Do you feel me, Shirou?” He panted against the male’s slack lips. Each word he spoke, pushing up and forcing himself deeper, the sharp cry. The slow nod of a dark head, Shirou’s body trembling.

“Your body-” Words broken off when heat covered his hand, gasps above him that resembled his name. Licking at the heavyweight’s lips, slipping inside to taste more while sliding his cum covered hand away from Shirou’s length and up, uncaring that he was smearing the fluid on his skin. Ignoring the throbbing part of his body that lay inside Shirou’s body, waiting for the male’s breathing to calm down. Brushing away damp hair from his view of Shirou’s eyes, Hidekuni couldn’t help but marvel at the love that radiated from just a look the wolf gave him.

Resting his hands, one’s that had been gently rubbing up and down the sweat slick back, almost curling his fingers, digging his nails when the body around him clenching tightly. The rocking motion, pulling him deeper and towards the edge that had been in reach just minutes ago. A playful smile graced Shirou’s lips, one twitching at his own before forcing the male off and onto his back. The look of surprise and heat in gray eyes, words gracing and leaving Shirou’s lips had him doing what he wanted when his lover was riding him. One leg over his shoulder, an order for Shirou to hold the other against his chest. Moving slowly, though his body seemed to beg for more, his eyes trained on Shirou’s face. Taking in the flickering pleasure that crossed , the flesh that slowly started to harden again. He wanted to take his time, build up again as he rocked into the one below him.

“Shirou, Shirou,” he whispered as he got closer to the edge, ducking his head, “be with me. Stay-stay with me.” Begging muttered into the side of Shirou’s neck, his body shuddering as he came. ”Marry me, Shirou.” Breathing in the heady scent that emitted from the one spot on his lover’s neck, the one spot that he nuzzled and licked at. Marking the skin with bit marks, covering it with his scent. ”Marry me, I love you…” Words trailed off as he realized what he just said.

Clenching his eyes tightly closed, the hands that had been clenching at his shoulders fell away ton to pull him closer. Warm hands reached up, cupping his cheeks and forcing him to look into worried eyes. ”Hidekuni?” A wince, pulling his softened cock from the heat of Shirou’s body. Once he was free, pulling away from Shirou’s touch, he sat back on he knees, kneeling between Shirou’s legs. Movement, the sound of blankets sliding and Shirou sitting up against the pillows. ”Hidekuni? W-what do you mean, when you asked?” Swallowing past his dry mouth and the nervousness he felt. Since he blurted out the question, the one he wanted to ask more romantically, not in the heat of the moment. Keeping his gaze down, ashamed that he had no control over his emotions.

“I wanted to ask you, before Christmas. During dinner, where it’ll be a personal moment. I’ve been thinking about this since you-, since we first started going out.” A deep breath, he could do this. ”I had everything planned. A dinner at the restaurant, a private room for the both of us. I wanted to ask if you’d like to-,” he couldn’t help the stumble in his voice, “I wanted to ask you to marry me.”

“Hidekuni, are- are you sure? I mean, you’re not asking me because you’re afraid that Yonekuni will try to get me back?” The question, asked softly as Shirou reached out, trailing his fingers down his cheek and forcing him to look up. The worry in gray eyes, the faint turn of lips, a frown worrying swollen lips.

“D-did you hear me? Back in the hotel?”

The slow nod, turning his head into the gentle cup of his lover’s hand. ”No, it isn’t because of my brother.” He bit his lip, looking away quickly and just as quickly, looked back. Well, a little. But the reason is because I want to spend the rest of my life with you, making you happy. I want to be with you for the rest of our, no. I want to be with you until the end.” He confessed, pulling Shirou’s hand to rest on his chest. ”I’m scared, so damned scared that Yonekuni will steal you away. Or that you’d want to be with him.” Fears that had manifested in him for the past couple of months came spilling out. ”Build a family together, with you.”

Silence reigned in the room, his eyes searching Shirou’s eyes and his face for any hint of an of what his lover was thinking, any hint of an answer. The heavy pounding of his heart was the only thing he heard, pounding in his ears as he saw Shirou’s swollen mouth open and move but heart nothing.

“W-what did you say?”

Did he dare hope? The squirming of Shirou’s body and the flush that the male supported.

“I said, “Yes, Hidekuni”” It took him a second or two for the words to sink in before he moved, pouncing and forcing the male back onto the bed. Covering Shirou’s body with his own, dropping kisses and nips along a pale throat that was bared for him. About to dip his head, he stiffened before remembering what he bought earlier.

Scrambling off Shirou’s body, struggling to pull his pants back up his hips while shouting over his shoulder “Stay right there! I”ll be right back!” Tearing out of the room and down the stairs, taking them two at a time before the first floor was taken as he reached for his jacket that hung next to Shirou’s. Hand slipping into the inside pocket, pulling out the small, velvet box that held the ring that he had bought earlier. Hanging his jacket back up, he returned the way he came, up the stairs before entering Shirou’s room, right where he left his lover. Closing the door and shucking his pants, joining the canine on the bed.

“Here,” he held out the small box for the male to take, “I’ve been searching for weeks. I-uh,” he scratched at the back of his neck in embarrassment, “searched London and couldn’t find the perfect one, but today, this evening-.” A shake of his head, his cheeks even more flushed than Shirou’s. ”I hope it fits.” He offered as Shirou pulled out the band and tried to slip on his finger, though finding it was a bit too smile. Biting his lip in frustration, the gentle smile his older gave him was enough to calm him down.

“We can get it re-sized.” Shirou offered, slipping the ring off and back into the velvet box, setting it aside. Smiling against Shirou’s neck, he showed his fiancée how happy he was, cherishing the wolf’s body.

It was early the next morning that he heard the door creaking open and the startled gasp, though at the time, he thought it was merely his imagination. Snuggling deeper under the blankets, the body in front of him shifting, pulling away just enough to to move before settling down again. He didn’t hear the click of the bedroom door as it closed softly behind the person who opened it. By the time he woke up, he could smell the breakfast cooking and an empty bed, almost panicking before remembering where he was. A silly grin crossed his face, remembering the night before, the way he screwed up proposing and the way Shirou had shown him how much he wanted and loved him.

Blankets tossed off, getting up and reaching for his discarded clothes, wishing he brought a change of clothes with him before sneaking out of the bedroom for the shower next door to Shirou’s room. Once he was clean and dry, pulling on the clothes form last night, he headed down the stairs, pausing at the landing when he heard voices murmuring softly. A deep breath, pushing himself to move, entering the kitchen.

“Shirou?” He called out, seeing a dark head lift and a flush to cheeks. The sound of a chair being pushed back as Shirou stood at his side, reaching for his hand.

“”Mom? Dad? This is Hidekuni,” his lover introduced, though he knew that Shirou’s parents knew him already, “he’s my boyfriend and now, fiancée.” He expected the normal reaction of parents when their only son was dating another guy, but the warm and loving smiles that the older woman gave him and the approving not that Shirou’s father wasn’t what he was expecting.

“Shirou-chan told me that you two were dating for some time, ” he warm smile dimmed at her next words, “treat him better than you brother. I dn’t want to see him depressed again. He’s my son, if not by blood, by love.”

“I’ve done business with your father, Maximilian-san, Hidekuni-kun,” Shirou’s father said as he folded the paper he held, “you’ll go far. Treat my son right.” The look leveled at him and for Shirou’s adoptive father being a monkey, the look had him swallowing hard and nodding.

“Yes, sir. I’ll treat him just right,” looking at Shirou, the small, encouraging smile, “because I love him.”

~

The last days before the holiday flew by quickly, Hidekuni noted, spending time with his future in-laws and getting to know Shirou’s adopted family better. The visit to the graveyard, honoring the wolf’s birth parents, the introduction and the promise to take care of him. When they both knelt on the cold ground, he felt a hand slip into his, squeezing lightly. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see a faint sheen of tears as the wolf talked and wished that they could see them here, now.

Enjoying the light snow that started to fall as he took his lover to get the ring re-sized, sliding the now fitting ring on Shirou’s finger. And the look that the clerk gave him when Shirou held his hand, quirking an eyebrow, as if daring the man to say a word. Time rolled around, he kept the plan of dinner at Karen’s restaurant with the specific orders to have Yonekuni kept away. Returning back to the room he was given, ignoring the stony, uncomfortable silence when he joined his parents for lunch, planning for the dinner that night.

~

He stayed close, eavesdropping as much as he could without being caught, using the waitresses to learn what information they could catch while they they worked. He knew of the dinner Hidekuni had planned and the fact that he had been banned from serving them, irking him to no end, but just as well. He had his own plans as well, it was the news yesterday, getting the call that the girl that he had gotten “pregnant” had gone into premature labor. Of course, he hurried to the hospital, though not in worry for the girl’s well being, but to find out if the child she carried was his.

By the time he had arrived at the hospital, she had given birth to a small, baby boy. It took a few hours before the news trickled down that the child, the newborn was neither crocodile nor dog, but nekomata. The shame in the girl’s eyes and the apology for ruining his relationship while the apparent father stood at her side, glaring at him for all he was worth. A former coworker, a host. The relief flooded him and he wanted nothing more than to call Shirou and tell him that the child wasn’t his, but he didn’t know the male’s new phone number. But now, now was his chance. The dinner that Hidekuni had planned and the party the next night, the night of Christmas.

Counting down the hours, checking the roster for his assignment and cursing, seeing the younger Inukai and Manami working the private room, where the two were most likely having dinner. Trying and failing to trade with the two, surprised by the way Manami refused, thinking that the small nekomata would have liked to have the night off.

Smiling as he greeted the guests, showing them to their table, unable to stop the clenching in his gut. The very same feeling that had been dodging him all week, after realizing what Hidekuni had bought earlier that week. Sighing quietly under his breath, he endured the hours, severing those that came to enjoy the food and the atmosphere and the anticipation of the holidays. And while the pit of his stomach twisted at the thought of Hidekuni and Shirou, he couldn’t help the feeling of pride as the female patrons looked at him in awe and in lust.

By the time his shift was over, closing time as he and others were left to clear the tables, he caught sight of the one person that he thought about. And the very one that had been a thorn in his side for so very long. The bright smile that Shirou wore as he talked to Hidekuni, a smile that faulted when gray eyes saw him. The stiffening of the wolf’s body, the ducking of a blond head, whispered words that had Shirou’s body slowly relaxing and the glare that his brother shot him. His body moving on it’s own accord, trying to push his way past the workers and towards the couple that were walking away from him.

And is fate was working against him, his father stopped in front of him and allowed the two to slip away. Turning towards his father, a snarl at his lips only to match the one his father wore. The hand on his shoulder tightening and holding him in place.

“What is your problem, Yonekuni? You’ve had your chance and now you’re determined to ruin their happiness.”

Jerking his shoulder out of his father’s grasp, he thought for a minute before answering the question, almost reluctantly. “I don’t want to lose my chance at happiness. I’ll take Shirou away form Hidekuni, I’ll fight for him.” He answered and the underlining threat, he never knew how his words would come back to haunt him.

~

Fidgeting in the semi formal wear he was forced to wear, grabbing a flute of champagne from a passing waitress and gave her a smile. A smile that seemed to beg for help while the girl in front of him droned on, about what, he didn’t know nor did he care. He didn’t even know her name, though he was sure that he fucked her at some point in the last year or so. Taking a sip of the chilled champagne, he eyed the room with little interest. His cousin and his husband, children that were growing fast, surrounded Kunimasa’s three year old and the one that had been born just months ago.

The middleweight that had been another thorn in his side for the past five years seemed enamored with his date, the same one that had answered the door when he visited. Eying the door, almost impatiently and as he was about to look away, he caught sight of who he was waiting for. No one but him paid any bit of attention to the single person who entered the Christmas party, each one enjoying the festivities. Following Shirou with his eyes, watching the male approach the middleweight, narrowing his eyes when Shirou started talking. The hand on Shirou’s shoulder, watching Oushou gesture over to the children.

He couldn’t help the low sound in his chest. The hand on Shirou’s shoulder, even though it wasn’t in any way sexual, should be ripped off by him. To step between the two and tell the middleweight to keep his hands off his bitch. His thoughts paused, Shirou wasn’t his, was he? No, he lost the male, but now, he’ll fight his brother for the wolf. Lost in his thoughts, he didn’t see Shirou part from Oushou and his date, weaving through the party goers.

The touch on his arm, the feel pulling him from his thoughts. Shaking his head, he gave the girl a small smile before the girl continued chatting while his eyes searched out Shirou, finding the male with his arms folded over his chest. Posture almost stiff, watching his younger brother talk, Kunimasa explaining something that had the canine slowly starting to relax his stiff posture.

“So, Yonekuni-kun,” the girl began, running her fingers up and down his arm, “I was thinking that if you’re not busy later tonight, how about we celebrate the holidays together?” Turning his attention to the one who seemed to attach herself on him the minute he entered the party. About the answer, decline and tell her that he had plans with someone else, he saw that Shirou’s attention turned from Kunimasa to the one who approached the two. Following Shirou with his eyes as the male left the party as quietly as he came. Body moving, shaking off the hand, he followed the two, never knowing of the shaking of people’s heads and the pitying looks he received.

Into the darkened hallway, away from the party and the light that spilled out, following the figures that had left the party. Murmured words that he didn’t catch and what light from the party filtered through the hallway, he caught the sight of a blond head ducking down, stealing lips in a quick kiss. His body trembled in shocked, watching Shirou pull back and hoped that the wolf would rebuke the one who kissed him. His hopes died quickly when he saw lips move and this time, it was Shirou kissed the other. Head tilted, muffled moans as Hidekuni’s arms came up to pull the wolf closer. The pain in his chest blossomed as he took in the two. The one he loved being held by his brother.

Unaware that a low rumble from his chest echoed through the muted hallway, watching the two quickly pull apart.

“Get your fucking hands off him.” He moved away from the shadows, stepping closer to Hidekuni and Shirou. “You took him,” a jerk of his head towards Shirou, “from me. I’ll fight you as a male for him. He should belong to me.”

Through narrowed eyes he watched the nekomata urge the wolf behind him, letting his soul flare at the intimacy between the two.

“He only belongs to himself, Yonekuni and I won’t give him to you just because you’re on this so called “kick” that you think he’s yours. Do you honestly ever think about anyone other than yourself? How about the way you treated Shirou? Did you even think that he’d get over you and the way you treated him? Cheating on him?” His brother answered and asked, his own soul flaring out in response. “I love him!”

His body moving, almost morphing. He could feel his heavy tail swaying, longing to strike out and damage the jaguar. Ignoring the clamoring around him, his instincts screamed at him to strike and take out his rival. To claim his bitch. His prize and mate, to do what he should have done so long ago. A flurry of claws and teeth, tail slamming into the jaguar’s body, knocking Hidekuni to the ground. Blood lust pounded through his mind, wanting nothing more than to see the nekomata defeated on the floor, bloodied and barely clinging to life while he claimed what was his.

A step forward and another, only pausing when a blur of silver and gray streaked in front of him, stopping him from his victory. A large form, having not seen Shirou’s natural form in years. The wolf stood braced between him and Hidekuni, sharp ears lay back while pale eyes narrowed at him. Uncaring that the fight started to draw the party goers from the festivities and to the hallway. The shocked gasps and the muted whispers. All of this was ignored while he stared at Shirou, a step forward while his soul retreated. Hands held up in surrender.

“Easy, Shirou.”

Furred lips curled back, revealing sharp teeth that could rip muscle from bone in an instant, a pink tongue licking at elongated canines while a deep, guttural growl emanated from the wolf’s chest. Another step and the growl intensified. Fur along the heavyweight’s back bristled and stood on end before jaws and teeth snapped at the air, a warning sign he had to take to heart. Something the small crowd understood as well, taking a step back. The pit that resembled his stomach clenched tightly while his heart froze. He understood the position that Shirou placed himself in, understood it so well that he had to swallow before he could speak.

“Shirou, you need to get out of the way.” A moment’s pause before the shake of the canine’s massive head. “Get out of the way.” Another order ignored, he moved closer and watched the wolf brace his stance, lips curling once more, his bitch was defying him. “Move, dammit! Let me finish him off so you can be mine.”

His hand, despite his better judgment, reached out, only to be pulled back quickly as razor sharp teeth snapped at him, missing his fingers by just a hair. He stepped back in shock. The protective stance the wolf had over the injured Jaguar was easy to understand, to see.

“Why are you doing this? Interrupting a fight between me and Hidekuni! Don’t you know that this is over you?! Winner gets the bitch, gets you.” Gray eyes softened but remained defiant. This wasn’t the male he remembered. The Shirou he knew would move when he ordered him to. Movement from behind Shirou, watching his brother sit up all the while, rubbing away the trickle of blood from the corner of his mouth. A flash, Shirou’s soul retreated.

It was the cold look in the normally warm eyes that stopped him. The kneeling male radiated an anger that he hadn’t seen from the normally calm and collected Shirou.

“You’re fighting Hidekuni over me?” Words spoken calmly and almost calculated, as though Shirou was talking about the weather and not this. But he knew, taking a step back at the glare his former boyfriend sent him. He nodded and out of the corner of his eye, he saw the younger blond get up. “Don’t I get a say in this? Fighting my lover in trying to take me away? I may not understand the way of-” Shirou’s words stopped when Hidekuni placed a hand on the male’s waist.

“I’ll still fight you, brother, because I don’t want to let him go. Even if you win, you’ll never have his heart.”

Frustration at Shirou, Hidekuni, at the situation and everything building up until he couldn’t hold it in any more. “It shouldn’t matter that you don’t understand. If I beat him, you’ll be mine!”

“Even if you do beat him, I won’t go with you, Madarame! Even if you love me, which I seriously doubt. I love Hidekuni. And I won’t give him up because you-”

“But I do love you!” He interrupted, desperation coursing through him, he never thought that Shirou could love another. Watching his words skin in, the widening of pale eyes and the darkened color to already flushed cheeks.

“Y-you love me?”

Swallowing thickly, he nodded again, feeling his heart race in anticipation, as if he were a young school boy again. Surprised eyes closed and a heavy sigh. A glance at the nekomata at Shirou’s side and though his brother’s poise was that of someone being as patient as he could, he could see the worry that edged in blue eyes.

“I love you, Madarame,” the gasps from the crowed and the muttered was nothing but background noise, “and I think I always will. But I love Hidekuni more. Much, much more.” He could feel his heart break and wondered briefly if this was how Shirou felt when he saw him with girls or covered in perfume like scents and the marks that they left behind.

“He’ll hold my hand in public. He’ll kiss me and defend me like a true male should. He’s held me and comforted me so much, especially what you called me last time we spoke.” He could hear the thickening of Shirou’s voice, the emotion of remembering the horrid words he called Shirou. “Madarame, you were pretty much ashamed of me while we were together. It didn’t take the threat of someone stealing me away to get him to tell me that he loves me.” He watched Shirou cradle his left hand, fingering an item on his finger. “And now, just a few days ago, he asked me to marry him.” The canine leaned back against Hidekuni.

“Madarame, no,” the shake of a dark head, “Yonekuni, we were together for five years. And in those five years, you never touched me. Almost treating me as if I was nothing more than a hindrance to you. Someone noticed me, treated me as I should be treated. Accepting me.” Despite the amount of people in the hallway, he could hear the deep breath that Shirou took and the troubled look the male wore.

“What I’m trying to say, Yonekuni, is that we’ll be friends later on, but it’s time for me to move on, for you to move on as well.”

Through pained eyes, unable to do anything but lean back against the wall as Shirou gave him a half hearted smile and held Hidekuni’s hand. Fingers interwoven, he caught sight of the ring that Shirou had been touching and the tender way his younger brother treated Shirou. The warm smile, he could only watch as the one he loved being led away.

He lost Shirou, realized too late that he loved the wolf.


End file.
